I’m staring at this blank page and thinking: This is one of the most important things you’ll ever write. Be kind and brave, Glennon. Steady. Clear. Shameless. Gentle. True.
Pretend it’s just the two of us here in my kitchen. I’m making us chamomile tea. I pass a mug to you and ask you to sit down on the couch with me. You follow me into my family room and and we sit down and I look at you. I can see that you’re nervous because you’ve figured out I’m about to tell you something important. I quickly say: It’s okay. Everyone is healthy. All is well. We are all okay.
We are. And yet.
Craig and I are separating.
What happened? I am still looking for the words. While I am smack dab in the middle of the unfolding, here is my best explanation: As you’ll read in Love Warrior, Craig and I endured serious trauma a few years ago. We suffered. My God, we suffered. I was broken, just completely shattered. And then we healed. It was beautiful.
And this is what I learned: You can be shattered and then you can put yourself back together piece by piece.
But what can happen over time is this: You wake up one day and realize that you have put yourself back together completely differently. That you are whole, finally, and strong – but you are now a different shape, a different size. This sort of change — the change that occurs when you sit inside your own pain — it’s revolutionary. When you let yourself die, there is suddenly one day: new life. You are Different. New. And no matter how hard you try, you simply cannot fit into your old life anymore. You are like a snake trying to fit into old, dead skin, or a butterfly trying to crawl back into the cocoon, or new wine trying to pour itself back into an old wineskin. This new you is equal parts undeniable and terrifying.
Because you just do not fit. And suddenly you know that. And you have become a woman who doesn’t ignore her knowing. Who doesn’t pretend she doesn’t know. Because pretending makes you sick. And because you never promised yourself an easy life, but you did promise yourself a true one. You did promise – back when you were putting yourself back together – that you’d never betray you again.
And so one day you sit down with your beloved, wonderful, kind, brave, warrior husband and you look at him and you say: Honey. We have worked so hard, for so long. We have been warriors for each other and for our children and for this marriage. And yet. I don’t fit here anymore.
And your husband looks at you and, eventually through his tears, he says: Four years ago you gave me the most selfless love I’ve ever received. It healed me. And now I’m going to return that kind of love to you. The kind of love that only wants truth and wholeness and peace for each other.
For the next several weeks, you do nothing but cry and talk. Sometimes it feels like that’s all you ever do—because, it turns out, you have been grieving your marriage for years. But still, you cry and talk more. You close the bedroom door and sit on that bed and you talk. You talk about how hard you’ve worked together, how you stayed on your mats and didn’t run from each other. Since you didn’t run, you discovered together that fight or flight aren’t the only options. There is a third way: heal.
You talk about how broken you each were when you met, and how whole each of you is now. You say to him: You’ve been my healing partner. He says: And you have been mine. You talk about how you can forgive someone and love someone and at the very same time know that you cannot be with them anymore. You get more honest than you have ever, ever been before. You talk about how hard, how very brutal it’s all been for the two of you. Since day one. And you talk about how beautiful it’s been for the two of you. Since day one. There is a moment in every conversation when one of you says: My God, the kids – and neither of you can go on. That’s the black hole. Still is. I can’t write more about that right now. Someday. Not today.
You sit in a therapist’s waiting room to discuss how to handle this with as much peace as possible for the kids.
You sit with your children and you create a new family mission statement:
Then you help your soon-to-be-ex-husband-forever-life-partner move into a rented house a few doors down. You have family dinners, plan your family summer vacation together, and you look at each other and realize you’ve never loved each other more, bigger, truer.
And then you tell your team. You tell the people who are invested in your career. And hot damn, this is bad timing. There is fear and panic. Because you are about to launch the biggest project of your career, the book you finished a year ago, and so many have been working so hard for its release. And it’s all about your marriage. And the advice from many is: Wait, G. Just wait till after the book has launched to reveal this. This is a MARRIAGE book – you can’t break up before it even comes out! Glennon – it will affect sales. It will affect your career, your success.
And you will listen to this advice. And you will decide: No.
Like Mama T said: I was not called to be successful. I was called to be faithful.
I was called to be faithful to truth and vulnerability and to YOU. I never promised anybody I’d get it all right; I promised I’d keep showing up forever. Today. Whether I’m in the valley or on the mountaintop.
Please come close when I say this next part, it’s important: This next step is not a departure from the path of the Love Warrior. This next step is the fulfillment of it – for me, for my particular journey. Love Warrior is a book about self-trust. It’s a book about a woman who has painstakingly learned that there is a still, small voice guiding her through this brutiful life one next right thing at a time. And that the only thing she cannot do – not ever again – is betray that voice. Self-betrayal is allowing the fear voices to drown out the still, small voice that knows what to do and is always leading us home to ourselves and to truth and to love. Love is the boss of me, not fear, and certainly not “success.”
And by the way, success to me is not staying in a marriage — it’s staying in my own peace. At all costs. And so, even when it’s highly inconvenient – even when it feels CRAZY – I will listen to the voice, and I will obey it. And I will be messy and complicated – and I will show up anyway. Because I’ve fought too hard for my sobriety, sanity, integrity—and for your trust—to give it up now.
So I said to the team: We tell our people now.
And they said: Okay. Should we clear your schedule then? Revealing yourself in your writing about this is one thing, but do you want to be on stages with it? Won’t that feel too vulnerable?
And I thought about that for a while. Lord have mercy, cancelling the tour sounded good.
And I decided: No.
My family is here, now in two houses. But my family is also you.
I will not hide from you, not now. I will show up in your cities, in your churches and theaters and on stages and I will say: HERE I AM. A little busted up, but not destroyed. I will be at my weakest, but when we are weak, then we are strong. If I’m this weak, can you imagine how strong I’ll be? Damn.
Listen: Love is not a victory march. It’s a cold and it’s a broken hallelujah. So I might be cold and I might be broken but I am still gonna scream HALLELUJAH all over this country. I am going to stand in front of you with my medicated little head held high and I am going to be so busted up and broken that the light is going to pour out of me like stained glass. I know this.
Here’s what else I know: Some loves are perennials—they survive the winter and bloom again. Other loves are annuals—beautiful and lush and full for a season and then back to the earth to die and create richer soil for new life to grow. The eventual result of both types of plants is New Life.
New life. Nothing wasted. No failure. Love never fails. Never, never. Love is messy and beautiful and brutal – and Love is the whole point. So, I am not afraid, I was born to do this.
I’m asking you, please love me through this. Be my people. The world will have opinions and I need this Love Warrior Army. Please stay close.
Sister On, my beloveds. We can do hard things. We belong to each other. And LOVE WINS.
G
P.S. Since I publicly announced the trauma in my marriage four years ago, I have become a soft place to land for women in marriage trauma. I have listened to what kind of responses from people are helpful and which are hurtful. So many of us want to say and do the loving and supportive thing, but we sometimes don’t know what that looks like. So, with humility, love (and a healthy dose of defensiveness on behalf of my heart and the hearts of my warrior sisters), I offer the following thoughts:
If I don’t mention something, it’s not because I forgot to. It’s because I desperately have to find the balance here between honesty and a tell-all. Between transparency and responsibility. What I owe you and what I owe myself. There will be parts of this story I (try to) keep for myself and Craig and the kids. If you can, please resist assumptions, gossip, or asking for details I haven’t provided. I can tell you this: I feel defensive of Craig here. No one could have worked harder. There is no better father or man on earth. Craig is a hero. He is a Love Warrior. I am fiercely proud of him.
Try to avoid lamenting how sad it is that people “throw away their marriages these days.” Try not to generalize. I have met hundreds of divorced women who didn’t throw their marriages away. Most of us fight like hell for our marriages until we realize that we can either save our marriages or save our souls. So please, I’m not looking for advice. Just love and support.
Please don’t pretend to know what God thinks of us. Please think deeply about the chasm-wide difference between leaving a man and leaving God. Please remember that when a woman leaves, she just brings God with her. Nothing separates a woman or a family from God’s love. Not death, and certainly not divorce. Jesus taught us that sometimes death is necessary for there to be new life. And that God loves us far more than any institution God made for us. When someone suggests otherwise, it brings shame to us. But we won’t let that in. We are women who have become far too wise to believe in shame.
Sometimes, when people make decisions about marriage, it evokes strong feelings in others. If my news does that to you today, please look inside and get curious about whether those feelings have more to do with you and your life than they do about me and mine.
I will repeat this last one: Please stay close. I need you more than I’ve ever needed you.
Author of the #1 New York Times Bestseller LOVE WARRIOR — ORDER HERE
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1,790 Comments
You are brave, you are loved, you are honest, you are doing one of the hardest things you have ever done, but know that we will stand beside you every step of the way. We love each and every one of you Meltons. You give and have given so much. Please be sure to take just a little time for yourselves in there. xoxoxo
Staying close, sister. Staying close. We are all just right here for you. For all of you.
I came to this post through a share on Facebook today – and it could not have been more timely. My partner and I have been together for over 25 years, and have been pushing through a lot of tough times the past few years – our own family trauma. Honestly, these events left me physically and emotionally broken, and I am slowly repairing myself. In the process, I have learned that my partner is not part of my vision for myself going forward. In reflection, it has become obvious that we have been “un-coupling” for some time now, and we have just let our children know that this is what we have decided to do. Just revealing that, being honest about that, I think was freeing for both of us. I have no doubt there will be ugly moments, but mostly I think we recognize that we do care about one another, but we are not meant to continue on as partners. I am still working through my own feelings about a life that has taken a path that was not planned or how I had imagined, and this is just part of that journey. In the end, I know we will all be better people because we will be living in an authentic way. I so appreciate what you have shared here today, because it reflects so much of my own thoughts about this part of my journey.
Staying close and giving virtual hugs and kisses to all of you. Xoxo. Thank you for always sharing your heart in this space. You are incredible! Now I am off to grab a tissue.
I can only quote back to you what you wrote on Facebook 7/3/2014, and which I saved in my heart (and on my computer) during the disintegration of my own marriage at that very moment:
Momastery, 7/3/2014
“I wrote this 16 months ago, in the middle of the implosion of my marriage. As I read it today, I felt so proud of this woman I was, this brave woman who kept breathing and showing up. It is so important to stop and look back on your past self and feel awed by her. And – when you are in the middle of the fire – it’s important to stop and consider your future self- who will look back on this difficult time from a safer, fuller place- and who will be awed by your mighty courage. For gathering it all up and using it to get her from there to here.”
I am still awed by your mighty courage, and I am with you, with so much love.
Glennon, I’m so sorry and also – me too. My husband and I separated last week after months of knowing and planning and I honestly think that telling everyone is the hardest part. The rehashing over and over, trying to explain without divulging too much, wanting to protect people like my grandmother from the sadness. So many times during this experience I have quoted you. It is hard, but we can do hard things. It is the right thing and it will be brutiful for awhile but then it will be ok. And even better than ok. I am learning to call on my people – you have taught me that. Thank you for being true to yourself and to us. I’m right there beside you, sister.
❤️
so awed, so moved
you’re in my heart
Always with you. Always loving you, Craig, and the kids. You will do this with all of the love and grace our God has to offer. Carry on, Warrior.. carry on.
Always with you. Always praying. Always l9ving you, Craig, and the kids.
I am moved and inspired by your integrity. It is not a small thing to chose love and faith over fear. Keeping all of you in my heart and thoughts.
Dearest Glennon,
The Lambs send all of our love to you, C and the kids. Peace and harmony to each of you.
We are so proud of your mission and your honesty.
Love, Sandy, Jay, Sara, Rebecca and Jenna.
Honestly, I would not have bought your book had it not been for this utterly honest post now. I’m still tender that the marriage I put my all into ended after years of working on repairing betrayals. We were together 15 years and have been seperated/dvorced for 12! My tender defensive self just can’t bear anything that suggests if my faith were stronger, if I tried harder we’d still be together. MY ex and his partner of 13 years…do the math… recently separated and I made it my mission to be the solid friend who held her hand through the hard days – even if it was online, and never offered any advice about saving things, or this being best – just my experience getting through the hard days, my empathy and my compassion. This summer I’ve been overjoyed that my kids have still spent lots of time with their stepmom. Its been the best thing for me as far as healing that defensiveness goes. We are all imperfect and earthly….and we’re all stardust.
Glennon, I’d never heard of you (possibly because I’m not a mommy) until I saw you speak at the Brave Girls Symposium last month. I LOVED everything you said when I heard you.
I look forward to your book with more love and SO much respect for you and your whole family. In fact, I’ll be buying one for all the women in my life. Living your truth is something we women need to do more of. Thank you for being a huge light and sharing your truth.
Sending you SO much LOVE. <3 <3 <3
sigh……heartbreaking to read. How we love you, uphold you, caress you, and hope for healing by our God who neither slumbers nor sleeps.
I may be the only warrior coming at this differently, but please allow this loving, thoughtful comment.
Many years ago, Sandi Patti wrote a fragile, authentic song where some of the words were:
“The stage is is bare, the lights are gone, Lord…..now’s the time I need your song; to give me joy and certainty…”
I say, with love and respect, perhaps it’s time to shut ‘it’ down and envelope yourself and your kids into solitude. Your writing today is filled with so many “I’s” and whenever that personal pronoun rears its ugly head with m.e., God is waving the red flag. This may resonate with your wounded heart, or maybe not. But it is said with care and respect.
I’m so sorry. I hope all of you get through this wholer and fuller and happier and better. That’s so great that you are able to live so close to each other, and do family things. You are still a family even if you are now two households, and i think it’s wonderful that you are able to honor that fact and each other as you transition and settle into the new normal.
~<3~Sarah
Love and peace for you, Craig, and your precious kids. Can’t wait for the new book.
Beautiful and brave piece of writing, all in the name of love !
God bless you and your family !
Sending all of the love, gratitude, tears, and light I have to you. Carrying on with you, and your Love Warrior clan. xoxo
Thank you for this post. My heart is filled with love and blessings because of your words. Your are blessed among women!
You are the best. You’re transparency is the only clear thing that exists in this social-media filled world where all we do is try to pretend like our lives are better than they actually are. I appreciate everything you write about. It gives me the strength to be broken and sit still in my brokenness. It gives me strength to find peace with my brokenness. We are all broken, and anyone who criticizes you is just covering up their own brokenness. Thank you so much for your transparency and the beautiful words in your books and blogs. I love everything about your writing, and I am counting down the days to read your wonderful insights in your new book. Sending peace and love your way. xoxo
Sending love, thank you for your love.
Your words “I just don’t fit here anymore” resonated with me at such a deep level. We never now what life will send our way to challenge us. Or how we will learn, grow and change from those said challenges. There is no way to predict who we will ultimately become when we reach the other side. I can only imagine how hard it was for you to come to that conclusion about your life and how you brave you were to share it with your Husband and all of us. Not to mention your Husband’s incredibly touching response to your revelation. I couldn’t hold back the tears. Nothing but love and support to you and your family as you travel through this next chapter of your life.
Oh sister Glennon. You are so brave and kind and honest and true. We love you because we all feel like your best friends. I’ve talked about you so much that I think my husband now follows you on Facebook–he sent me the link to your blog post before I even saw it. So much love is headed your way from Wisconsin, where I have my ticket to see you in late August. I will be sending you and Craig love and light and wishes for healing as you navigate this new road. Thank you for being YOU and for trusting US with this.
Sister on, G…we love you and will stay close…count on us!
Being human is so daggum hard sometimes. Your vulnerability is breathtaking. Carry on, Warrior…you got this.
Dear Glennon,
Thank you for writing this, one in a long line of gifts you have given to me and so many others. I wish I could reach out a hand and make you that cup of tea–or make one for Craig, or squish your beautiful kids. I’ll trust that you can feel my heartfelt wishes for your joy, individually and together. I am also separating from my husband, and it’s a baffling journey. The book? I’ll buy it, because I was always going to buy it, because when I read the things you write I feel like I want to be the kindest version of myself, and that’s what I’m moving towards (even when I fall on my butt). I wish for you that you will be caught up in a web of kindnesses, lifted by the holding hands of everyone you have lifted up. I hope something makes you laugh until your sides hurt. I hope you get chances to cry when you need to. I’m so grateful you’re in the world.
Me too. I’m walking along with you. My husband is an addict. I stayed with him through rehab and recovery, but then a relapse and all the lying and hiding that went along with it. The old me would have kept fighting but I was recovered too and the new me just couldn’t fit back in that life no matter how hard I tried. And so I left and it was at the MOST inconvenient time, which he still reminds me of when he wants to hurt me. He is a good man and a great father when he is ok, but when he is active in his addiction I am lost. I saw my life ahead of me, one endless cycle, and I could not fight for that, no matter how much I love him.
Thank you, as always, for your brutiful honesty. I may have hidden in the bathroom, right in the middle of my first family vacation without him, to read your news and cry, but they were tears I desperately needed my tears for you, tears for me, and tears for everyone who is leaving to save their souls. Much love to you sister <3
Your honesty, openness, humility, and just all out raw-ness is why this community even exists. You show us by your example how to be brave in the face of fear and how to stand tall when the world wants us to cower. Your family will renew and how you are all walking through this will serve as an example to others. You have said so many things I agree with. I had to walk away from trying to save my marriage of 15 years with my 3 daughters. I didn’t throw away my marriage, I need to save my soul. Warrior On, I say again, Warrior ON
G,
Thank you for sharing this with us and for saying no to those who told you to wait. We love you and connect with you because you’re real with us and share the brutiful – what others are afraid to share. Not being authentic would have been very off-brand. 😉 I can’t wait to read Love Warrior and the lessons you share from your experiences during that chapter of your life. A chapter ending doesn’t mean that it isn’t important or worth sharing. We can still learn from it. (I’m actually more curious now to know how you and Craig got through that and were able to get to a place where you could separate so lovingly).
I am praying for you, Craig, and the kids to have peace and strength and love through this transition. I’m glad you chose to heal for your sake and also so that your kids and others around you see that as a viable option as well. Warrior on!
I feel like you are inside my heart and giving me the words that I haven’t been able to find for my husband. We have been married almost 17 years….been through so much…and we separated a few months ago. I haven’t been able to explain to anyone how I can still love him ( I don’t know how not to) but KNOW really KNOW that I can’t be a healthy me in this marriage anymore. You have given me words to share with him. You have given me words for me. I will never be able to thank you enough.
Love to you and your family. And thank you for your truth.
I am in the middle of something where I may have to decide it is time to cut bait because to go further would hurt my soul more than heal it, would be destructive rather than productive. I’ve struggled with “the knowing” that I am at the end because the end will be very painful for my husband and I. While it is not divorce I’m speaking of, it is very much about the loss of the future we envisioned and the family we assumed we’d have. Thank you for your incredibly brave, transparent, living-out-loud words. They have helped me today. They have helped me stand strong where I am and know, if it happens that I need to make the hardest decision and say the hardest words out loud, I can and I will.
I’m not sure what to do with myself. Part of me is screaming IF GLENNON CAN’T MAKE MARRIAGE WORK WHAT HOPE IS THERE FOR THE REST OF US!? And another part of me knows that is selfish. Totally unfair. Your story does not have to be mine. They can both be beautiful and true. That you Glennon, in all your infinite wisdom about love and marriage are not the poster child for how to make your marriage work. If anything you are the poster child for love, forgiveness, being true to yourself and the ones you love and you can be all those things within a marriage and still be all those things when you walk away. You are a strong, incredible and amazing woman. I feel your sorrow as you end one chapter and excitement as you begin the next. Carry on warrior. We are cheering for you.
No judgement, only love and support. Hugs and peace and warrior spirit in your darkest moments. You are brave.
I have read a bit of your work but I know who you are. My dear friend forwarded this post to me and this is what I want to say: from one woman to another, from one brave ,soul revealing writer to another YOU ARE AMAZING. I have never been married and I’m almost 59 but what I know is this: we are fed fairy tales that marriage is supposed to last forever and sometimes it just isn’t able to do so. We are told, by society, that we fail if the marriage fails, that somehow we are less valuable because it has ended. But, like seasons or certain things in life, some marriages end. Fact not fiction. What I applaud is that you and your husband are doing this ending with love as the goal, the love of each of you and the love of your children. THIS IS WHAT MATTERS. This is what is the most important thing in this sad unraveling. You tell your story brave sister, with your head held high and know it is your own and that you have been true and honest and wow, what a gift that is.
Thank you for sharing. You have no idea how much you have helped me with this post. I’ve been lost and trying to work out why I feel changed but everything around me seems the same; why I love but don’t want to be around my husband. None of this is easy by any stretch of the imagination, but helping me through my thoughts and feelings is something you have inadvertently done. For this I thank you from the bottom of my heart. God bless and you’re family you during this difficult, but important, chapter in your lives.
Glennon-I can’t tell you how much your post resonates with me. My heart goes out to you with love and such a sense of sisterhood. I, too, have recently walked this path….where after 24 years of marriage it came to feel more like an acceptance of what WAS than a decision to divorce. I feel very similarly to you. I have to believe that trusting the guiding light within us that is leading to our continued growth is the healthiest thing for all involved, including our kids. It takes a lot of courage to live in our integrity because loss and change are painful…but I have found in the last year, that there is a hum of joy there, too….knowing we are rising towards the sun (and modeling that to our kids) — it feels so RIGHT. A quote that got me through this time is this one:
“For a seed to achieve its greatest expression, it must come completely undone. The shell cracks, its insides come out and everything changes. To someone who doesn’t understand growth, it would look like complete destruction.”-Cynthia Occelli
Much love to you and your family as you figure out your new normals.
xoxo
Kelly
Love and Light Sister. What a flawed inspiration you are. Love to you, Craig and the kids.
With all my heart I send you and your family love. You are all brave and we will all travel on together.
You are not alone. We are here. Thousands or women (and men) loving you and loving Craig and your kids through it all. No judgement. Just love and understanding. You are in my prayers.
Standing with you, Glennon, in compete awe of your warrior spirit. Love to you. <3
Love always wins….The truth is always the right decision. Very proud of you for your courage.
Sorry for the heartache and pain. See you in Albuquerque.
Love from Brazil. I’ve been there and it’s such a journey that only Warriors can go through! All my love and support!
Thank you …. And bravo! I needed to read that, thank you.
So very much love. So, so much. From you, to you- my peace is your peace.
There is nothing more beautiful than raw love – love for oneself and others that is real. Love that honors one another, sustains a bond, yet allows freedom to take ones own flight path. You are a true Warrior – shining a light on what it is to be human, to be truly connected to the core of oneself. Thank you, thank you.
As a woman who has endured a couple failed relationships- I have been eagerly anticipating your book to help me thru my current situation. We too endured a trauma and are trying to overcome it. And now, after hearing your news, I only want your book more.
“But why?” You might ask? Because you, your whole hearted bad ass woman self, you know how to fight, and when to let go. And THAT is what people in these situations need. They don’t need someone who fell in love at 20 and stayed with the same person I’m a happily ever after Disney fairytale. We need someone who has been in the trenches, smeared with mud, under ceaseless gunfire, and stood there to battle it and survived only to decide they didn’t want to be a soldier any more.
You are a warrior goddess and I will buy your book and buy copies for all my friends. Screw your publishers – the Right choice may not always be easy but it is always RIGHT. And you my brave warrior are right.
God bless you , Craig, and the kids. No one knows your story except you guys. No judgement here. Praying for strength, comfort, and healing for you all.
Love and prayers for you, Craig, and your children.
Thank you so much for your honesty. This message was so timely for me today and I thank you from my heart for your bravery. I hope I can be just as brave moving forward and honor the whisperings of my soul.
Many blessings to you and your family.
The truth is always the right decision. Very proud of you for your courage. Sorry for the heartache and pain, but the truth is always the right decision. See you in Long Beach.
Hi Glennon, This is the first time that I’ve left a comment here on your lovely blog, but your announcement so touched me that I thought I would share some thoughts.
I’m so sorry to read about your marriage. I know it’s challenging, because I’ve been there too. I love your words, “we can either save our marriages or save our souls.” I choose as well to save my soul. My divorce was years ago, but someone told me that each day gets a little bit easier and that helped me through.
My children each healed in their own way. They had to process the experience individually. That is wonderful that your children’s dad is only a few doors down. My kids in the end, did well because their dad was close and they saw him often. They have had our struggles, however, and I’m sure the divorce had something to do with it. I believe they have healed and worked through it all as young adults.
At the time, I felt we had all moved on much earlier than they did which is something I realized later. Some of the issues can resurface when they have their own relationships down the road.
I do believe that the most important thing is that your kids see two happy parents who are willing to work things out even though they are not together. I worked really hard to stay friends with my kids’ dad and that has been helpful and useful through the years.
Best of luck. You will survive. You will find joy on your doorstep once again. I look forward to reading your book.
Once again you have become a shining star in the darkness of denial & deception. You are a ruthless stand for both integrity & incandescent bravery. You bless the lives of every woman & girl on the planet as a result. Go forward on this next part of your journey knowing that you are held and cherished on the hearts & minds of 1000’s of women around the world with infinite love. May Grace find you now & ever more
May you all have peace that passes understanding.
Thank you for being in integrity. Firstly to yourself snd then your spouse and family.
The timing in your message was profetic. I have had so many of what I call Eat, Pray, Love on my knees broken moments begging for an answer. I have been done with my marriage. And have 2 yeslar old and allow it to cause confusion regarding the matter. I recently returned from my own healing pilgrimage to Peru. I was shown there the love I still have in my heart for my spouse. I was shown to go home a heal my marriage. But nothong more about it. Your message was the guidance I needed at rhis juncture in my journey. And I cannot waot to rwad you book and thusly ore ordered it today. And look forward to its sequel.
Thank you,
Kara
I now have an explanation to the massive heartbreak I suffered 35 years ago and still feel the sadness of today. Less sad, but still tear brimming, nonetheless. You have taken the blame and sharp negativity off my failed marriage. I understand now. Thank you for baring your soul so that mine can begin complete healing. Your vulnerability is my pathway to genuine forgiveness. You are a very courageous woman.
May your journey be blessed and your heart always honest and true.
Thank you, Glennon,
Sally
Me and my husband are deciding right now whether to end our marriage or try one more (third time). It is a very painful time for us because we love each other but we are unhappy in the relationship because we are too different. I feel so broken, but I understand that I can’t go on side by side with the person who doesn’t understand me. Please, send me some love today.
Dear Glennon,
This is the the 1st thing I ever read of you, thanks to Elisabeth Gilbert ‘s link on facebook. Your honesty is very deeply moving. It was one of the most beautiful, sad and true things I ever read about love, and it makes me profoundly greatful to see that there are more and more people who know that tiny voice inside of all of us, whether you call it soul or whether you give it other names, the one that you know you have to listen to because it is that or breaking yourself, because listening to it and embracing it is the only way forward, even if you have no idea where it will lead you and it’s the scariest thing ever. Anyway, reading this really makes me want to buy your book! I admire your courage and your honesty. Take care, I wish you all the very best for your way.
Glennon,
I am strengthened by your words of honesty and truth, and I have held that moment of truth myself, and when that moment in time arrives, when you know that you can no longer be the saving grace of both the marriage and yourself, you must honor your self, because if you do not, the outcome would surely be the death of your soul. This is a heartwrenching moment, when you want to claw and scratch to hold on, but you know you must let go. I wrap you in my words of support, honor, love and compassion. Thank you for affirming a decision I made so many years ago,
there are many of us who have curled up in the fetal position at a time such as this. You are brave and strong to be standing in your own truth with your dignity. I commend your strength, your honesty, and your courage. May you and your family always be surrounded by love and light.
From the bottom of my heart, thank you for sharing this.
I went through a divorce at age 18. Because of how young I was,
I felt very isolated from other divorcees. I couldn’t find anyone to reach out to
who both understood my predicament but also the point in my journey I was at.
While I wasn’t able to benefit from this post at age 18, I feel like reading this now really brought me some closure.
Divorce leaves thorns in the soul, and while we do our best to remove them, some of them remain after years.
Reading your post removed one of those final thorns for me.
I hope that you can find comfort as you go through this process. If anything, please find solace in the fact that your vulnerability is helping to heal countless others. You are a true role model. You are leading a revolution.
It’s never easy. After the death of my father sooner than expected I had a similar revelation that I was fighting for a marriage with the old me and the new me needed a chance. The me that sat in sorrow and pain and guilt for knowing I wasn’t who others wanted me to be and I wasn’t the same woman. We tried hard to make our marriage work. Today we are friends with clear boundaries but we keep the kids a priority and it has worked. Sure my kids are sad as are all kids who believe in their parents and have to learn at a young age that they are just humans . This is the hard part for them. Keep them in your focus and they will thrive. It is also important for the.m to know you BOTH believe you are better off this way and always talk about the things you liked about your spouse because kids understand that is part of them.
Love and hugs to you and your family.
Glennon, you are surrounded by so much love and support. Thank you for your honesty. The world needs you now.
I honor you and your courageous choice! Holding space for you in all ways. I have never been married, but I know the pain of self-betrayal and it hurts – a lot. I’m so glad you are listening – It’s helping me to do the same. Lots of love and hugs!!!
many many hugs.
You, Craig, and those beautiful beings you made together will be in my prayers. God bless you for being vulnerable and honest. I can’t imagine how difficult this has been for you all, especially when you’re in the public eye. My prayer is that the love and support you receive will build a shield to deflect the negative stuff. That your family will continue to hold each other close and grow together as you begin this new chapter. NOTHING but love for you, G. ❤️
Beyond admiration is gratitude… thank you for sharing… I look forward to reading your book…
PS the timing of Liz Gilbert’s sharing of your post was guided by the invisible hand that knows all and LOVES us without qualification…
Thank you for having the courage to share something so personal. There are so many of us walking similar paths and your words were what I needed to hear today . You all will be in my thoughts and prayers.
Thank you for being honest Glennon. It allows us all to get true and honest with ourselves.
Love you,
Stacey
I could have written that. It scares me sometimes how similar our experiences, thoughts, and words are. Sometimes, while I am reading… I think…. “Did I write this??”…. and realize it is your voice….
Hugs. and
Tears. and
Couch Tea.
just ….thank you… for sharing your soul with us…. and making us better…. truer….more loving ….sisters and alowing us to all feel safer in our own skin… to embrace our brokenness with gratitude instead of shame…thank you for making this really lonely life less alone.
hugs. and
tears. and.
couch tea.
Huge amounts of love to you and your family!!
Axxx
Love flowing your way G. Hope all the love surrounding you is a balm to your soul. Ya know how people weight lifting and body building say ” I’m gonna get ripped”? They rip their muscles and continue working out all the while gaining strength and it shows when they flex to show ya what all their hard work produced. I think you might be going through a soul ripping. Hang in their girly. A stronger G’s about to bust out. You go girl!!
“Some loves are perennials—they survive the winter and bloom again. Other loves are annuals—beautiful and lush and full for a season and then back to the earth to die and create richer soil for new life to grow. The eventual result of both types of plants is New Life”…. this is remarkably the most beautiful articulate bit of writing I have read.
you are a strong, honest and integral woman. I applaud you – both of you.
I send love.
Glen,
you are so brave, honest and authentic – really admireable.
Glad that you choosed to follow your heart and great that you had the possibility to talk with each other.
You have my full empathy. (send you a hug <3)
With your statement "we can either save our marriage or save our soul" I got so many goosebumps. It is sooo true <3
Last year I decided to separate – and it still feels so right, so clear, so authentic.
When we have clarity of our emotions, self-esteem and love, we can overcome very difficult times. Its a kind of rebirth…
I wish you wonderful days and a wonderful life.
Take care.
Lots of love
Michaela
You don’t owe us, or anyone, an explanation of what, why, or how. That is your business. Thank you, as always, for your honesty and willingness to share your story. I’ll be thinking of you and your family, and following you just the same. Hugs as well.
Love and prayers to all of you always.
G- LG said it best that this is a story you are living not a story you are telling.. Yet… You are an amazingly strong and beautiful soul! We will all be lovingly holding space for your pain, healing and rising! I can’t wait to read the book. Be a Phoenix dear one. All my love Jen
“I was not called to be successful. I was called to be faithful.
I was called to be faithful to truth and vulnerability to YOU. I never promised anybody I’d get it all right; I promised I’d keep showing up forever. Today. Whether I’m in the valley or on the mountaintop.” Beautifully said!
I applaud your integrity and strength. I’m fresh new in your community, and without knowing anything about the past you referred to, I can only say that this post is enough to show me I’m in the right place. I want to join others and send you my light, my good vibe and unlimited support to you, Craig and your family. Wow, how glad I’m for finding Elizabeth Gilbert post today and discover a woman that lives in her truth with such grace that warms my heart. You’re special, Glennon. And the world is a better place with people like you.
Sending love to you right now, Glennon. The tears are streaming down, both for you and for myself. I am walking a similar path in my dissolving marriage. I’m thankful for your bravery and that you have chosen to be vulnerable with us. I fight a huge amount of personal shame because of where I am. Your willingness to share your story helps so much. I pray you feel nothing but love from others right now.
You are brave, kind and loved as is Craig.
G…I do not know your story but I can tell you this. As a man, I stayed and lived in a marriage for 10 years after I found my wife had affairs with my best friend and several others. Since she was an alcoholic, I stayed until she could get healthy and quit. when she did, I found that through my own journey, I had become someone new as well. Your words resonate wonderfully in this post. My ex wife and I are still friends but we have both moved on to other lives. i still, and always will love her, but I have a new life as does she.
I salute your courage
I salute your honesty.
And most of all, I salute your life and your love.
Respect.
The unexpected waves of emotion that come with a failing marriage are hard to swim through. This afternoon was one of those times when I felt like the undercurrent was pulling me down. That I couldn’t breathe. Where I felt the emptiness inside but also felt the intense heat of fear. How will I do this? Can I trust myself? What if I’m wrong? How can I do this to my kids? No one will understand. All these overwhelming yet real thoughts fill me so that inner voice who knows what’s best drowns out and instead gets released from my through tears. How can I both love my husband and yet know my journey with him as my spouse is nearing the end? It makes no logical sense. How can I explain this to all those who will wonder what went wrong? I don’t know yet.
Through my sobs for some dumb reason I opened Facebook and found Liz Gilbert’s post. I cried some more but this time with added gratefulness of reading something so raw and vulnerable…my feelings in words. I don’t know what this will do for your books sales and I am sure you will get negative feedback from some, but I can say with everything I know in this moment, this post has blessed me in so many ways. Thank you for being such a role model! I love that you gave yourself permission to be both broken and visible. I feel like I need to hide because when I go out I will be plagued with the gossip and judgements that happen when a woman in a small rural community leaves her wonderful husband. If you can go in front of crowds to tell your story, I can go to the grocery store. Thank you for listening to your voice and thinking of us all as your family. Your braveness has been my life preserver today! When I pray, I will add you and all the other women on here who need the strength to keep swimming.
Love you! Thank you for staying true to the still small voice, we need to know that’s okay!
I’m walking the same path and am glad to hold your hand. Stay strong, you can do this.
I have just met you today thru your writing. I support you and your family. Hugs.
I am not going anywhere. I am staying close. And I love you. And I am so proud of you and Craig.
I have loved your writing and honesty from before four years ago and I have followed you on this journey so far. Sending more love your way and will continue to pray for you warrior. And your amazing family.
Love and Respect to you from me!
I’m filled with love and compassion for you and your family. There’s no advice I’m fit to give (or that you asked for) so I am holding space in love. Feel the love, peace, patience, courage, healing we’re all sending your way. ❤
Yes, exactly what Emily said. I’m sending that too.
Glennon, you are loved. Beyond words. Beyond measure. As someone who loves you- that love extends to Craig and your three beautiful children. I send all the love and peace I hold in my heart to all of you. May you look to each other for comfort and healing. My you rely on those you love to buoy you up-as you so generously so for your readers. May you continue to find a way to use your life to heal others. May you walk through this life change with the protection of God and surrounded by love.
Love and light to you and yours. Each of you.
Thank you, thank you, thank you, Glennon for sharing your authentic self. I don’t know of you and your work, but I follow Liz Gilbert and when she shared this post and I read it, it broke my heart open, with an outpouring of love for you and your family. I support you and your loving courageous self. Thanks for your willingness to share your vulnerability and sadness and pain with all of us. I support you and honor you as you move forward in your journey of self discovery.
The Divine in me recognizes, honors and celebrates the Divine in you. <3
Dearest Glennon,
Love and blessings. SO much love and so MANY blessings.
I know enough of you to see that this is the hardest thing you have done, lately. Maybe ever. Maybe parallel with your journey to sobriety and wholeness, and certainly part of that journey. And that this is the most true thing you are doing or can do, at this moment. And that the end of a loving and striving marriage is never a failure. Never. No matter what anyone might say to you, to the contrary. (And especially if they say they speak for God.)
I’ve been with you since “Don’t Carpe Diem” and “A Mountain I’m Willing to Die On”, and I’ll be with you as long as you need me. I send all my love and support, in whatever form you need it. If I lived closer, I’d bring casseroles and sit with you over a cup of tea. OK, a pot of tea. Maybe several.
With love and gentleness,
Betsy
P.S. — Now, to figure out how in heck I can be at one of your far-away Tour venues, so I can give you a BIG hug, in person.
Thank you for your honesty. I can relate to your story. Two weeks ago would have been my 50th wedding anniversary and yes it was a little sad but definitely no regrets. After 25 years of marriage and yes, several trips to pastors and therapist, my ex-husband and I decided that our marriage was not working. We also had concerns for our children even though our daughter was out of the house and our son was soon to be a senior in high school. They have not only survived but are loving, successful ,kind adults. My ex-husband and I have remained friends over the years through graduations, marriages, death of family members (true the relationship does change) . We are both better people !! God Bless You and Your family.
Oh Glennon,
I am amazed at your fierce spirit and all the hard things you have done and continue to do. Your honesty touches me and continues to inspire me.
Giant hugs to you and your family. I hold you in my heart.
Oh, your words touched a deep place in my soul. The way you have dealt with things in your life is honorable, you are blessed with a man that was willing to heal and move ahead with you, so many do not/can not. The Warrior in me hears the Warrior in you.
You did the right thing by being honest. I look forward to reading your book.
Namaste’
Warrior on!
Marci
It’s good you put it out there before anyone else. I had to do the same. After 31 years. To let people know we didn’t hate each other we just had changed through all the stuff and that’s ok. To let people know that no matter what age my children were, they are hurting too. I am praying for you and your family through this.
Love you, Glennon.
Holding you and your family in my heart, so tight. <3