I agree. Let’s stop rewarding these guys. Some may have mental health issues, but I think some are just evil.

I am so sorry Ann..

I am so so sorry.

I feel your pain, Ann. I, too, lost a son, probably the same way you did. 🙁

Thank you for your insight and caring.

Children are developing and learning and making connections all the time, whether they’re with their parents or not. Wouldn’t you feel better knowing the other adults whom they encounter on a regular basis are also contributing to their development in a positive way? I totally agree that more parents should be shaping up their act, but I think teachers are almost as important as parents in a child’s development.

Yes, totally agree with you. I am my child’s parent, and its MY job to teach them first. I am their teacher, not you. This is the problem, most teachers think so little of all parents, and have elevated themselves to a place in children’s lives that they ought not be. That you think you are better for the kids than their own parents, is pathetic – hence our decision to homeschool our kids so that we know where they are at, we know how best to teach them and what they need. No teacher can do that, and no teacher should ever think they can better parent other people’s children in all cases.

I agree with you….parents should have that job. Parents are the first ones that their children will learn from.

However, you are missing the point here. Sadly, not all children have loving parents who do teach them these things. Some children don’t have parents in their lives at all. Who teaches them then? Their teachers.

Yes, the subject matter is important. But we learn much more in school than just knowledge…we learn social skills, we learn about ourselves, and we learn about society. I will always make sure I teach my subject matter, but letting children who obviously need help in other areas of their lives slip through the cracks would mean that, while I’m technically doing my “job”, I’m not taking on my RESPONSIBILITY.

I am a teacher and feel the need to be a mom, dad and teacher to all of my students because there are parents who do not believe in teaching their child to be brave and kind. I appreciate those who do as it makes my days a bit easier, but I must still teach those qualities in a setting outside of the home. My “job” is not to just educate children about math and reading and writing, but to help them become the best person they can become.

It never hurts to have more people supporting out children.

While I agree with you about parents needing to do THEIR jobs, whether you realize it or not, teachers are never just teaching their subject. A valid and important part of teaching is also modeling and expecting students to develop desirable personality characteristics so that they DO become better people. Part of the standards for teachers nowdays is that they model how they want their students to behave towards others in this classroom. So whether you like it or not, character building has always been and will always be an important part of every child’s education.

Teachers do and should help shape children, teaching math and English is not in a vacuum, there are classroom dynamics involved that you can’t dismiss that easily. Realize that kids spend about 7 out of 12-13 hours a day with TEACHERS and additional time with coaches and the like, more time than they spend with their parents on a daily basis. While I do agree that teaching these things are a parents job, it is the parents job to lay that FOUNDATION and I hope a child’s teachers, administrator, coaches, etc. take the time to strengthen that child’s foundation. There are also many times teachers see things parents can’t because they aren’t there, yes we would hope our child would tell us, but sometimes they don’t, for whatever reason. I would, again, hope a teacher would notice and help.

Amen, Sister!

While I tend to agree that parents should be more involved and actually teach their children, that is not always what actually happens. Let’s look at the real world: many parents are not parenting and/or are working many hours.

Let me tell you a story…
As a child who grew up with no father and a promiscuous mother who had no time for her five children, teachers like this are the reason people like me are still alive. When I was in sixth grade, I had the notion to end my life, since no one seemed to noticed me, appreciate me, or care if I even existed, especially my mother. I was the oldest child and was cast off more often than not and always sent to my room with the other children to “watch” them. I found bottles of my mother’s pills (some prescription, some not) and mixed them all together in hopes that I would just fall over and die or fall asleep and never wake up. My sixth grade teacher, Miss Krecek, saved my life. She sensed something was amiss and took it upon herself to show me self worth. It was a slow, painful process for me, but she accomplished what she set out to do: make me a better me. After many years I still talk with her even though she is getting up there in years and has long since retired from teaching. She, and other teachers like her, show kids like me there is value in our life and we can become productive members of society. Without teachers like these, there would be more suicide and violence in kids, who will eventually become adults.

While we as parents do have the responsibility to teach our kids to be brave and kind, it is not the reality today. Rather than saying what parents should do, let’s just embrace the reality and work in a positive direction with what we have. Not all parents learned how to be responsible parents from their parents, and instead of focusing on that, let’s focus on the children who are suffering, because it is not their fault their parents aren’t doing their job. Kudos to you for being a good parent, your children are lucky, but keep in mind things can change even for the “best” parents. Something to keep in mind, try walking in another’s shoes for a day. It’s called empathy.
From,
A “best” parent (in the eyes of my children) & a “best” teacher (in the eyes of my 5th grade students)

My questions exactly! Then what? How do you fix it after you have figured out it’s broken.

Love, and lots of it. Sometimes all it takes is someone noticing you and taking the time to talk with you. We may not be able to make the other kids play with them, but I guarantee that there is more than one lonely, bullied child and if you can bring them together, what a difference that could make. Remember, it’s not the quantity of friends, it’s the quality. Just one can make a difference and if it’s just the teacher, it still can make a difference.

Elle, I have the same questions as you. And I also have some strategies that might be interesting – are you a teacher? I hope there is perhaps a sequel to this lovely post.

For me, showing interest and seeing a child goes a long way toward creating positive change. Acknowledging their fears and being someone for them to simply talk to can allow a child to try on a new way of being. Striving to understand them and then reassure, reassure, reassure, can do so much. (And it’s not just the children who crave this, the parents and my colleagues do too!!)

There are also some really wonderful no-bully pamphlets that I use in the classroom to bring objectivity and awareness to the children I teach in a gentle way. I encourage them to take care of each other, to use their hands for good, and to speak up when a situation feels bigger than them. We look at our missteps and forgive and try to do better next time. We keep talking.

I don’t ever try to solve problems for the children or claim to have solutions. But I find that something as simple as talking about it leads to great change!

I think there is part of me that has faith: I am a teacher because I want to serve. I don’t have to know how to solve problems, I only have to be willing to say, “I’ll help you.” and take that first step toward a child to lend a hand, and trust that the strength, good ideas, intuition, and connection comes…

We need this so much for all of the children.

thank you, I have been teaching for decades and was touched by the letter. I was reading the comments and read one that referred to a misguided thread of comments, I only saw one comments and all the replies to it seem to disagree. I defend everyone’s right to their opinion, as long as it is informed. Ignorance is the root cause of misconceptions.

You obviously are unaware of today’s classroom. Visit or volunteer and see if you you have the same opinion afterward!

Please come up with a way to disarm the criminals first.

Same here in Australia, I second the motion! nobody needs guns.

New Zealand is an entirely different country. When I first began visiting there in the early sixties, we could have no blacks on our crews. Heck, you only have 4 million people, many indigenous. We, on the other hand, have more than 5 times that many undocumented emigrants without a history or control, as one example of our differences. Please let me know your plan on adopting an amendment to our Constitution (which requires a super majority of the member states) to eliminate 250 + million unregistered weapons from people who are reluctant to surrender them. We are a Constitutional nation, not one governed by the whims of who might hold the preponderance of power at the time. Although heartfelt, I believe your “we are superior” inference, like most simple solutions, needs much more research and thought before attempting to solve others problems.

Stella come to the United States and try that…your entire population fits into one of our states…so you come here where you have muslims looking to do nothing but kill Americans, gangs raping murdering robbing…liberals with nothing but hatred in their hearts for America…yes come here and say you don’t need a gun! Our population is over 360 million and growing!

There are under 5 million people in New Zealand. There are 300 million guns in the United States. And, the citizens here have a constitionally protected right to own them. Changing the constitution on this issue would be impossible. You say “You don’t need them.” But there are 299,999 other guns out there. I’ll put down mine, when they put down theirs.

Mass shootings are horrible, but there have been several potential mass shootings here that have been stopped by decent people who were also armed. Those just never get reported.

How did this go from teaching to gun control?? Let’s keep our eye on the ball!

With all due respect, your comparison, as well as others in this thread, between crime in New Zealand or Australia and the United States is an exercise in futility. Without political agenda or personal attacks, crime per capita is the nearest relevant statistic you could use to make a comparison, but you neglect to account for differences in demographics, culture, population density, etc. For instance, the majority of violent crime in the US is concentrated in high population density areas. The population of New York City alone is twice the population of the entire country of NZ. If you look at crime rates in this area, then sure, they are higher per capita than NZ. But if you look at lower population density areas with comparable population, you will see that the crime rate per capita is LOWER than NZ. Interestingly enough, they also tend to be concealed carry areas and areas with large numbers of personal weapon ownership, as opposed to the higher crime areas, in which guns are already illegal to possess or carry. Australia is a huge country, yes, with a population LESS than the state of Texas alone. You can’t compare crime rates between AU and Texas, much less than AU and the US! Here, demographics play a large role in the crime rates. BUT, this story was about a caring teacher, not gun rights.

There is one other thing those young men had in common: access to guns.

An EDUCATED RESPONSE includes that RARELY is a child born Violent and if being Male is the cause, will Leslie NEVER vote for a Male Congressman or President to protect our Country??? It is dangerous to generalize!

not all school shootings were done by young men. read up on Lauire Dann from Illinois in the 80’s she had total disconnect!

That is a tragedy. This “teacher” clearly should not have been teaching and retired. Either she lost the joy of teaching the new generation or never had it to begin with. My 4th grade teacher was like this and I was so happy that he retired mid year. We got a much better one who actually cared about his students.

Westevenssr, I apologize for your experience. It’s hurtful to hear that as a teacher who cares about her students. I had a teacher that used to humiliate the students and make us squirm in our chairs afraid to be called on. I use her as an example of what I never want to become. Hopefully, you can find a way to forgive her and kick her out of your head where she’s been living rent free all these years. The forgiveness is not for her but for you so that you can heal. Use the experience to make you a better, more caring person.

Sincerely ,
A Teacher Who Cares

Hi,
I am 64 and my second grade teacher did the same to me. She would punish me, embarrass me, throw workbooks at me and give me a hard time. Her name was Mrs. Kanous and I went to school everyday with stomach aches. It’s hard to forget that kind of experience. I wonder, how do you define bullying in our case.

Well, westevenessr, you should have gotten over it, yes.
What about the teachers in grades 3,4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, and all the high school teachers you had? You never gave any of them a chance just because of one Mrs. Reese? At some point the problem becomes you.
Sorry you had a bad experience, but its long past time to build a bridge and get over it!

Sorry, but ultimateIy I can’t find anything good about Columbine happening.

I understand what you’re trying to say but I disagree it was in any way a good thing Columbine happened. Bless those parents who lost their children that day as well as the children who lost their parent and keep them all from ever reading an assertion as unkind as this one.

I don’t think it’s a good thing Columbine happened but I understand your point. it IS a good thing that if it’s going to happen that people find a way to learn from it and make it a positive lesson. We don’t want something horrible to happen to teach us those lessons but if we don’t learn from tragedies they will be bound to happen more and more often.

What a horrible thing to say!! It’s possible for good things to come out of bad, yes, but that doesn’t mean the event itself was good. And Columbine didn’t happen because of bullying, but because the leader of the two boys was a sociopath. Read up on it.

I love this secret mentor concept. Must. Spread. Idea.

With all due respect, your situation sounds very specific to your child. Millions of children start kindergarten at ages 5 to 6 and do wonderfully socially, emotionally and academically. It sounds very much like your son was just not ready for this environment. Many children at this age are not yet ready for an academic experience, but most are. One reason why pre-K as a bridge is so important. And to be honest, if you keep him home as much as it sounds, he may never be fully ready. But the world is in fact a social place populated with people who interact, who learn and who work together. I hope that at some point your son is able to enter school and develop these skills.

I don’t think anyone in this country is “forcing” education on 3,4,and 5 year olds at all instead of them staying home with their “loving families” as you so eloquently put it. The sad truth is that in this country, many “loving families” do not have the luxury of children staying home because both parents have to work outside the home in order to make ends meet. Single parents, unless they are on welfare or independently wealthy, also have to work out of the home to support their family. For some children, school is a more loving, safer environment then the home. I am happy for you that you were able to homeschool your child when he was having difficulties, but most families in this country do not have that luxury available to them. In Denmark, the country you mentioned in your post, mothers are able to take 52 WEEKS–a whole year–of maternity leave, many at 100% of their current wage. Here in the United States, many moms do not have ANY paid leave, and if they need to work, they put their children in daycare starting at 6 weeks of age, usually at exorbitant rates! So for many families in the United States, enrolling their children in state-provided preschool programs at age 3,4, or 5 is actual a blessing in monetary savings.

It’s fine to disagree with the American system of education, but unless you plan to separate your child completely, including his later life as he enters college and eventually a career, sooner of later you have to conform to the American way of doing things. The early years of school are a warm up period for what life in America is like. Like it or not, we exist in a perpetual social pecking order. While it may be true that “Success, intelligence, learning, ingenuity and brilliance emerge from a place of confidence, safety and freedom”, you have completely forgotten about the importance of functioning socially with others and being able to handle tough situations. It sounds like you did not prepare your child at all for the system he would be going into.

Fortunately my experience in my schools in Canada was not even close to your child’s. The feedback I have gotten from my students and parents over the last years do not reflect the negative experience you speak of. I have taught for 35 years and I must say the colleagues I have taught with support the idea that students only learn when they feel safe and supported. I’m not sure if Canadian schools are significantly different that your schools in the US. I think we honour our teachers a bit more. I make $91,000 / yr as a teacher / vice principal and a teacher can make $84,000 in Canada. We really support struggling learners in Canada. Standardized tests are used, but do not dominate the learning environment and the importance of developing relationships with students.

You are delusional.

My kids were bullied in Sunday School. I don’t think sending them to parochial schools means they will less likely be bullied. I have encountered bullies in all walks of life, including Churches. What this teacher is doing is amazing.

Yes but in even in catholic schools the bulling goes unnoticed first hand expiirence with a 1styear student.it took pushing and threarting to file charges to have it stopped god is good and thank god for loving teachers who are not threaten by partners that are bullies the self

Marilyn you are absolutely correct. Thank God for our Catholic education. Jamie you couldn’t be more wrong. In a society thriving on immorality our children need proper guidance and unfortunately parents don’t always do a good job of this. Now a days too many parents are concerned with being cool and the friend of their child and their child’s friends . Catholic school’s do not force their views on non-Catholic students, which there as some in our schools. They teach love , compassion, empathy , dignity, faith, courage, morality and respect. Not many places to learn these values anymore in our society other than Catholic schools. Thank God for them.

I agree Roxann. As a teacher as well we are constantly having new ways of teaching thrown at us, only for them to realize later that their new way doesn’t work. Standardized tests seem to be all they care about but any teacher will tell you they are BS. The curriculum tells kids to write a certain way but if they did that on the test they would be marked penalized. Parents have to know that the standardized tests are not a good indication as to what your child can do. These are high pressure tests we force on our grade 3 and 6 students. When I walk by these classes and kids are crying because they are so terrified I have to think to myself “what are they doing to these poor kids”. I guess they are not as important as someone pushing forward their political agenda.

roxann – you’ve got it right! More power to you. Go with your heart.

You missed the point!

Part of raising a child is also teaching them. College isn’t an answer to finding work unless it’s in the sciences (and even then it isn’t 100% necessary, look at Einstein and Tesla). If children are raised properly and taught the basics, they can (and usually do) figure out the rest better than they can be taught. Get rid of the nanny-state and teach children to be self-reliant individuals. Teach them what they need both socially and educationally and you’ll have more well-rounded, free-thinking, intelligent individuals then you’ll know what to do with. It all starts and ends at home.

You obviously dont know the first thing about bullying, while teachers yes should obviously teach school work math , english , ect do you lnow much of that kods are actually going to remember? Especially at the grade school level. I myself am a tenth grade student and the only thing I remember from elementary school is the way people were treated , you may forget what people said to you , what people did to you , but you will NEVER forget how a person made you feel.. I think this is a beautiful idea becuase to many people are falling through the cracks at school. Do you know what kids who are being bullied and have no friends are learning at school? Not much becuase they have other things and constant worrying on thier minds. I agree that there are far more important things to be learned in a class room other than math and other subjects, once you teach a child how to be a good person and children actually enjoy coming to school themselves where they feel safe and happy, then you can teach them how to do math.

Chad,

I am going to assume that you are not an educator. Therefore, I will share with you a basic theory that we learn in our education courses. Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs. Please take time and educate yourself before you judge teachers for not “teaching.”

How to Apply Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs to Education
By Jody Hanson, eHow Contributor

Even with a college degree some adult children are living at home because they can’t find a job with the degree. Yes reading and math should be taught well.
But as a parent I believe my most important job and contribution to society is
raising children who feel loved and will share that feeling, receive a good education AND are good citizens. That comes from the classroom and family.

I’m not certain she is downplaying the importance of education. From personal experience I was considered the bully by the fourth grade, and didn’t know it. My teacher that year had been informed by parents of my classmates I was trouble. She approached the situation by giving me more attention than ever. I didn’t know I was bullying anyone, but I was aware I was socially awkward and didn’t know how to interact well. I played too rough with the boys, and was never much of a princess. I did my homework and followed rules never understanding what I was supposed to do in what scenario outside of classwork. I was a bit of an outcast, but that teacher made me feel important and watched me for opportunities to encourage the right behaviors.

Until that year I had not learned my multiplication tables, I was beginning to struggle with school for the first time ever, and my confidence was waning. Having a teacher who cared changed everything from that point onward. I now have a college degree in engineering, many many amazing friends, and a lot to be thankful for. Most of all I am thankful for that one teacher who helped me grow personally as well as academically.

The background of the story I was unaware of until Mom explained it to me years later. My teacher had gone to her first with the parental complaints.

Teachers spend 7-8 hours a day with your children. Sometimes more! Not to say they know your kids better, but they know them well and have an opportunity to be a positive influence. Teaching is more than the facts of science, math, reading, and writing – teaching is being apart of a childs life.

Chad,
I think you missed the point of the story. I can tell you that as a police officer, I have arrested plenty of people who learned only math and reading. Parents, no matter how good or bad are outside of the activities that take place in an environment that occupies the majority of a child’s day. To think they learn all about relationships and community in the average home is a misguided thought. I wonder if you have children of your own? Because you seem very threatened in regards to teaching children good attributes. Perhaps you are afraid of being considered soft? But I am not sure how being a good person equates to being 35 and living at home, because I have know a lot of “hard” people that are right at home on momma’s couch.

I have two children, both had many experiences with wonderful teachers that realized school needed to be more than a cold emotionless place. Not only did they learn math along the way but both received academic scholarships. They are now college graduates with successful careers and active members of the community. They volunteer for various local charities. Although neither is 35, they both live independantly and I’m pretty certain that they will continue to be successful, brave, and kind. Parents and Teachers raise and teach children.

Yes education is important but morals are more so….if we keep teaching science, math, and history without morals, love and compassion towards mankind then we are not allowing for our children to learn to love and be kind to all mankind…there’s way too much hate in this world….and while education is important I believe morals and love of mankind is more so especially now in a world bent on war and hatred toward others of different races and social groups. Like I said this is my opinion nothing more.

My students either don’t have parents or their parents do not “raise” them the right way. It should be that simple that “parents raise and teacher teach,” but the reality is that many schools across the United States do not have that luxury. Students need to feel connected and safe to even want to learn. If my kids feel disconnected and alone they will drop out of school before they even graduate high school. I agree with your statement in the way that I wish I could teach my children more than I am able to get through on any given day. You have to address, however, that children may not even have a home to go back to when they are 35. …or 13 for that matter. Without being inside the system, which is indeed flawed, you can not judge a teacher’s efforts to do the best they can with what they are given.

If you would like robots, send your children to a private school who’s first concern is image and college acceptance rates, otherwise sit in a public education classroom for one day and see for yourself the love and attention these kids receive. Without a proper foundation and a feeling of self worth, math and reading are useless. The kids need the love and attention will never have a chance to contribute to society. Thank God for teachers that actually care about their students lives, not just their test success rate or bench mark scores. I have one of the teachers at my house, my wife, and yes she cries because she knows she can’t save all the kids that need saving. She is more concerned with saving lives than her CRCT scores and that’s why she is the best teacher your child could ever have.

Chad, you obviously missed the point of the story. What this teacher is doing is absolutely amazing and the world needs more teachers like this. Although education is important, the teacher seems to be taking no more than 5-10 minutes out of the end of the school week to do this with her students and hopefully save lives, build confidence, and teach social skills that so many of our youth are lacking today. I would be honored if this teacher taught at one of my school districts and Chad, I really hope that you do not have children.

Chad:
Yes, it is important to Teach the subject at hand. Twice this teacher mentioned “every Friday afternoon”. You should realize the rest of every other day, morning and afternoon, is spent teaching Math…..

No, I do not want my 35 year old living at home without a decent job. But I do want my 35 year old living a “brave and kind” life, with a decent job, knowing what it takes to be flexible and adaptable in the world we live in today…….. It’s not always about “What’s in it for me and me only”.

Parents and Teachers raise and TEACH the children of today ~ that we do have choices, need to be accountable for our actions, life is not always fair, flexibility can make the difference to an amazing career, and help those less fortunate…..

You’re embarrassing yourself with that comment you miserable twit. Nowhere in this article does it state that this teacher downplayed education and your comments regarding education in the U.S. are naive and ignorant. Get this through your miserable head……the U.S. has never been atop the ranking in terms of test scores yet we have dominated the world for a century and have increased our dominance in terms of innovation, science, and technology in the past few decades. The reason is our educational system, where free thinking and choices are stressed. Any student who wants to learn here can learn and will learn at a level higher than anywhere else. To another point, the U.S. also has a larger minority population than any other country ranked ahead of us. There’s nothing wrong with that but it’s a fact that this does bring down test scores. It’s not a problem if you’re an intelligent individual who realizes that just because certain minority people without the necessary background, culture, family structure, experience, etc. aren’t yet capable of scoring well on exams doesn’t reflect the educational system of the U.S. as a whole. In addition, since we’re on this topic, it’s also a fact that other nations don’t test all of their students like the U.S. does. Germany has their kids choose a vocational or university tract at the age of 13. Guess what, the students who choose the vocational tract aren’t tested. Do you really think that the peasant kids working the fields in Western China are tested? Look at the countries ahead of us in the rankings……they’re small Western European nations with a demographic completely different than that of the U.S. Wake up!

Chad, I understand your point but also note that she does this in her “off time” on Friday night after the students have gone home.
Of course, she teaches all the curriculum- she has too because we are constantly testing our children on everything they do and our jobs are tied to it at least in some states such as mine.
I think the the most poignant, hidden message to be gleaned here is that in many classrooms, parents aren’t involved and/or are abusive or just MIA and it is left to the classroom teachers to fill the gaps.

I think the greater question is, “Why is this falling on the shoulders of the classroom teacher,” and finally, “Praise be to the teacher who takes her own time to look beyond the curriculum to the whole child.”

Everyone should be involved in our children’s education. Much is said about a society and how valued their children are.

Chad,

Contrary to the other responses to your comment, I’m not going to tell you that “you missed the point of the article.” I’m sure you got “the point” of the article — it’s a teacher who uses a (fairly common, and not at all new, believe it or not) little classroom game to help her be aware of potential social problems in her class. And it’s a good game, too. Doesn’t sound like it takes much classroom time (once a week, probably five minutes at the end of class to write some names on paper), and it probably does what it’s supposed to do.

Many of the responses above mine either missed your point, Chad, or actually agree that education is not an important part of school. THE reason we put our students in school is for them to learn. Yes, they need to be in a safe, nurturing environment for that learning. But to say that the creation of that environment is the most important thing being “taught” is absolutely false. The teacher creates that environment behind the scenes, and then teaches content inside that environment.

(I googled this “new way of teaching division” — strikes me as an excessively cumbersome, inefficient approach. I question the teacher’s choice of that method…I suspect it’s probably not her choice?)

Exactly Chad! This is why I don’t waste my time with public schools. I teach my child at home because at least I know she is learning!!!!

If only it were that simple! You sound like a parent who is doing their job…providing the home-life that models the underlying social values and responsibilities of all of us as caring and intelligent citizens of the earth. Unfortunately, this sort of parenting is becoming increasingly rare for all sorts of reasons. As a result, teachers are faced with students who aren’t having their basic emotional, social, psychological, and even physical needs met at home…and are being asked to ignore this hole in their soul and LEARN reading, writing, math, and science. As I’m sure you realize, we as humans are driven first and foremost by our need to survive…the basic needs that aren’t being met at home become THE MOST IMPORTANT thoughts in children’s heads at any given moment and without trying to salve some of them for our students, it becomes impossible to teach them anything that they will actually internalize and learn. I am not here to say that we, as teachers, shouldn’t be working our hardest to impart the knowledge necessary for a fulfilling and “successful” life…we should, and we ARE! It’s just that with the ever-increasing changes in society, it is a much more complicated job than ever before!

I think Char you missed the boat. I see where you of simple mind could not read between the lines to see that yes a teacher regardless is going to teach the three “R”s but with so many parents in the work force these days, single households, or just plane I have my child in every after school activity we have no time to be a family our children are acting out. I do say our children since we do go on it takes a village. This is not my first rodeo in raising a family. I raised three a got them raised and God blessed us with another she is a blessing for sure. She spent all last year 6th grade being bullied we worked with all three teachers thought we had it under control but the three male sh— were sly. To the point where she start to cut herself all while carrying straight “A”s. The fights that break out now in 7th are for stupid things and the bullying is vicious. Now my daughter speaks out more & louder and stands up for others being bullied. So,a Chad, having a teacher like this could have saved a painfull and dangerous memory as well as scars she now lives with. Their triggers are shorter on what makes them boil so if this can help then God bless this teacher.

I don’t think Chad is suggesting that the emotional well-being of children be ignored. But especially for parents such as the one who wrote this article, you should be teaching character, bravery & kindness at home. Communicate with your child about their emotional well-being. (Are they being bullied? Are they lonely?) The catch 22 for most teachers, like myself, is that many children don’t come from such caring homes where strong character is modeled – they may even be neglected or abused. The thing is, these are also the kinds of homes where there are no books, that are language poor, & where there is no academic support. My challenge is to fill in all the gaps, both academic & emotional. Caring for the emotional well-being of children has always been as large a part of teaching as academics. But for caring, involved parents to say, “We don’t care about the damn standardized tests. We only care that you teach our children to be Brave and Kind,” is inflammatory to me. I need the support of of caring parents not only to teach their own children character, but to reach out into the community & make it a better place instead of leaving me & my fellow comrades alone & unsupported on the front lines.

🙂

I have to assume that all responders with comments contrary to Chad’s belief’s are not abusive criminals. That being said, what kind of character ARE you teaching your children when you speak the way you do to another person?? I’ve read things like, “Chad, you’re OBVIOUSLY not a teacher,” “Chad, you’re OBVIOUSLY not a parent,” “Chad, you OBVIOUSLY missed the point.” I hope your children don’t get treated that way by their peers. Aaaaaand now we’re back to the original problem. Is anyone still scratching their heads about where children learn these behaviors? Because I’m getting a clearer picture of why I have to teach them to unlearn them & why it’s so hard since that’s what they’re seeing at home.

What she (both Lynn and Lois) said.
You, like many of my students, have “selective listening” and it is preventing you from gaining meaning from what is being presented. Just re-read it with an open mind and, this time, feel free to assume that this teacher is not at all advocating the disposing academics.

I agree Jen. Many parents drop their kids at school and wouldn’t know what happens during the day because they don’t communicate with the teacher. They only hear about any problems when they get a call from the school. We can’t just blame teachers or parents, we need to work together.
I think the teacher in the article is doing a great thing, regardless of whether it has anything to do with Columbine/guns/violence etc.

Thank you for this salient reply! I am disappointed, but not surprised at the selective, off base interpretations being posted. It blows my mind, but doesn’t surprise me.
I teach, I know that there are all kinds out there and I, for one, am willing to reach out to those who are disenfranchised or grappling with problems.
I will also refrain from retorting to any more of those comments as I recall the advice given by a mentor: “Don’t feed the trolls.”

Sir. I saw your comment and did want to know more. I haven’t finished reading the study yet but I did notice this statement on page 12. “• Many attackers felt bullied, persecuted or injured by others prior to the
attack” the author of the blog post may have stated “she notices who gets attention” but what it sounds to me like the teacher was doing, was noticing who felt bullied or persecuted as well as maybe who was instigating. Like throwing a stone in a pond, it is only one stone, we will never know who the ripples touch. But at least she is doing something.
Thank you for sharing in regards to the study.

I completely concur. Teaching is about nurturing a love for learning that all children have. It’s about creating a safe environment where everyone is validated; its’s creating opportunities for success that build self confidence because in the end, it’s a belief in oneself that will lead to life long learning…love this article and it’s a reminder to all teachers that the importance of relationship building in student engagement cannot over-emphasized.

Agree. So she can teach others to do the same.

That is what I want to know. Once you know what is going on, what do you do?

In no way is this a popularity contest. I wish to God that there had been anyone to see my struggles as a child by any means possible. But the only attention I got was few bully teachers whose only goal was to reprimand for incomplete work. Because they enjoyed that power over a little kid. Instead of finding out WHY.

What this amazing teacher does with these lists is to arrange her classroom seating so that children learn about their peers by working next to them. By breaking up the grouping each week she can put together groups that learn to respect other childrens’ gifts and challenges. She can reward those who deserve the good citizenship and place them with another child that can learn by seeing what good citizenship looks like. It is a tactic that has been used successfully by teachers to assess the social and emotional needs of their students for many years.It builds a classroom community ,and a feeling of security for the entire class.

Well, said.

This teacher understood what you do not. Yes parents can do this, but the parents of some children were the “lost” children when they were growing up. They never had any help, and thankfully didn’t resort to shooting to get noticed, but they also didn’t get the skills to be supportive loving parents. So we definitely need teachers like this who can step in and help when parents fail.

I don’t feel she would do it alone. I’m thinking she would contact the parent and see what is going on. If the parent was a lost child and still struggling, maybe this will help the parent too. Just to know that someone cares means a lot. And you never know, making that one child person of the week might change everything. The other kids might see this kid in a totally different way. Anything is worth a try.

I agree with you whole-heartedly. However, being in education, I am seeing the trend that parents are less and less involved with their child’s education even at the youngest level. The attitude is one of either, I work x-amount of hours a day to keep our heads above water so I’ll trust the school or It my kids life and I’m not interfering because they need to figure this out for themselves so they’ll be “stronger”. It’s really sad. Families are no longer connecting with each other. That’s why teachers NEED to step in and provide this kind of “monitoring”. We do what we can with what we are given. As a teacher, I’ll take any little bits to help me promote well being in my class. The sadder part is that this past week one of the students in my school committed suicide because he “fell through the cracks”. Preventing this is worth EVERY idea I can get to try to see it NEVER happens again.

I totally agree with all the comments above. It is so frustrating to see that we are held accountable for all the things the “parents” should be teaching. Unfortunately, no matter how hard “we” try in the teaching profession we will always be the ones blamed!!! We are having our “BABIES” ,( yes they are babies…3 yrs old ) in pre-school teaching them all the things they should be learning at home…!!!!!How about public schools start holding “parents” responsible for their jobs!!!! I find it appalling that a certain “drugstore chain” has to offer $25 gift cards for parents to pick up their child’s report card!!!! What has happened to society…???? Come on stop encouraging this type of behavior and Stop making excuses !!!!!!!!!

What you missed in the story is that this persons child already understands this. You can teach children anything, their brains are sponges. If you are teaching them this at their age, they learn it quickly. It is the adults that do not learn it quickly. That is why they say to teach children multiple languages from a young age because it is easier to learn. Stop looking at the story in a way that you think this teacher is wrong for teaching in a different way. Maybe these children will be smarter than the average child because of this teacher. You do not know this. Do not try to turn this story into a bad story because it is all a good story.

If these children are 11 years old, they are probably in about 5th grade. I believe the Math problems she is talking about may seem difficult to those who did not learn this particular method of problem solving.
The mother said in this article that the child understands how to work the problems. I learned Math in a different way than they are teaching our children now. I’m not saying this is good or bad, just different. I remember SO many years ago when my engineer father would get frustrated with the way I was taught Math. Trust me, my children learned completely different problem solving methods than I did. As long as they understood this different, but valid way to solve problems, then they are learning Math.
Right now my daughter is majoring in engineering with a minor in Math. She currently tutors children from elementary to high school senior at a Math Learning Center. I believe she uses whatever method she feels best serves that particular student just as I do when I am tutoring. I believe that students learn differently and as a visual learner myself, I try to find what is best for that individual.

I am a 27 year old teacher and math has changed a lot from when I was a kid… Which wasn’t that long ago. Before it was all memorization skills… Now kids need to know why. When I was in university and on a practicing in a grade 5 classroom, I was told I had to teach long division to the kids. Easy enough I thought. The teacher I was workin with asked me to show her how I was going to do it, so I did an example for her on the board. When I finished, she said “great! But why did you put the zero down there?” … And I honesty had no answer. We were never taught why when I was a kid, just how. A lot more is expected of kids these days in regards to understanding and not memorizing math. During that practic, I watched in awe as these kids picked up math concepts and strategies so much easier than I was able/willing to. Learning all these strategies is like learning a second language to adults, because we all know how to do it due to repetition. For kids, understanding the why and how (more than just simply what is the answer) is simply part of their math class; they don’t question it.

Regardless, my hat goes off to this teacher… I hope to have as successful as a career as she has had 🙂

I meant to say INSPIRING!! LOL!

And I’d like to figure out a way to doing something like this in my high school classes. With 6 different classes – we usually teach from 120 to 180 different students each day. It’s hard to get to know them all the way we’d like to.

ME TOO!

It is Saturday morning, and I am crying too. During a particularly challenging year, I needed this “warrior” encouragement. Our classrooms are truly battlefields for our precious children and sometimes I forget to see how far our impact can reach. We are a Kids at Hope school and district (check it out if you’ve never heard of it!!!) and ACES are important to our children. This teacher was an amazing Ace! I hope her retirement offers her rich dividends on all she invested!

Allison, I think you missed the point. The teacher IS STILL teaching 1+1=2, but she is additionally using her mathematical critical thinking skills to care for the children on another level.

Wow, your comment sounds a little like bullying. She didn’t say she wasn’t teaching, she said she was ALSO making sure the kids were doing well with themselves too.
I wasn’t bullied and I wasn’t the bully, but I still needed someone to make sure I was “okay”.

Alison, you may be good at maths (or not, who knows?), but perhaps you should spend a little more time reading things carefully first in order to correctly digest & interpret the intended message, rather than not doing so, drawing a series of rushed and incorrect conclusions and then firing off the typical ‘angry (yet invalid) knee jerk reaction’ post that social media is so rife with. You criticise (even abuse) others for the quality of their teaching, yet in this instance you haven’t demonstrated the same quality of information intake & processing (ie, learning) on your part. How about thinking a little first before smashing out that outraged reply…?

Appears that she is doing this on her own time and has the children write on tabs of paper just before the Friday afternoon bell. I think she is extremely insightful and probably a very good teacher in all respects.

What in the world are you talking about? Missed the point, indeed.

Lets also not forget this teacher is putting this little exercise together on a Friday Afternoon ,so she can analyse it over the weekend so when the new school week starts the kids will hopefully have the best chance to concentrate on learning without the interruption of social flexing? by those young minds ,in an effort to insure not only the gifted ones get the lesson but the entire class as a whole.

Agreed it is difficult in kindergarten at the beginning of year. Try using a photo chart. Like a picture menu. They can color in the 4 squares of who they want to sit with.

Donna you are very naive to think everyone wants to “throw their children into childcare at six months”. Some of us need to to put roofs over our heads and food in our stomachs. I agree it would be ideal to have a parent at home but wake up to the reality of life and stop being so judgemental. I’m glad that you have the luxury of not working

In a perfect world….. Unfortunately, very few parents can afford to have one parent stay home. Nowdays, it takes BOTH parents, if, indeed, you are lucky enough to have TWO parents together, to make ends meet. I watch my kids and their spouses struggle to try to make ends meet. Daycare is so expensive for 3 kids, they work opposite shifts. I see this and my heart hurts. And thanks to our government, it is only going to get worse for parents who try. Wouldn’t it be awesome, if everyone had enough money that only one parent needed to work? If prices on gas, groceries, clothing weren’t so high? If medical care didn’t cost an arm and a leg? If schools weren’t hurting for money and could provide good, nutritious meals free of charge? If schools could afford to hire enough teachers to make sure every kid gets the attention they need?
Yes, in a perfect world, Donna, MAYBE parents could. This is quite simple, in my opinion.

Donna,

I think our child’s behavior is based on the types of people that they are with. Whether they are at home with their parent(s) or at daycare, if our children are surrounded by people who teach them to treat others with respect, to have good manners, that they can’t always get their way, and how to be caring individuals, then the children learn to behave kindly towards others. However, if stay-at-home parents or daycare providers don’t teach their child these types of values, the child won’t learn them, no matter where they are. Also, sometimes parents who choose to go back to work do so for reasons to support their child (some examples: financial reasons so they can afford rent and food on the table; health insurance so they can take their child to the many doctor visits; they are single parents and can’t afford to stay home; their child has some sort of illness and they need to work to pay for medical bills etc.).

I don’t think kids have changed that much. When I was in kindergarten and the rest of elementary school over 25 years ago, I was a social outcast. I couldn’t make friends to save my life. There was no social media. If a teacher who observes all these social patterns had been paying attention, maybe it would have been different. If I had had a teacher like this one, maybe she could have helped. I don’t know.
It’s not just about parents not paying attention. If they’re not in school with their kids all day, they won’t see these things. It’s about some kids needing a little extra help with social skills.some kids are just different. Having both parents work outside the home doesn’t make a kid awkward. Some kids are just awkward.
And this is coming from a mom who homeschools. I think most teachers do the best they can with what they have, and they really do have a love of children and teaching them.

Donna-I feel your comment is completely off base. My son was in care from 11 weeks until almost 4 (before I lost my job) and that amazing center is where he learned how to interact with and care for other children. At home, he is the center of our world. How would he learn from a very early age that his actions and words affect other little people if not for daily interaction with his peers? And this is what all quality early childhood programs try to focus on. You can’t learn problem-solving and social-emotional skills at age 5.

Donna, Both my children thrived going to daycare. They loved it! They were excited to learn in that atmosphere, they loved their teachers and friends, they were geared for kindergarten much easier and were ready because they were use to the school setting and they built up their immune system prior to kindergarten. There are a lot of positive to childcare and if you haven’t tried it you can’t put it down. Your suggestion for one parent to stay home is also unrealistic in this day and age for most average families.

It’s sad that you are so disconnected from parents who use daycare that you think they “throw” their children into daycare. You don’t see the tears in their eyes the first day they leave the love(s) of their life with a day care provider as they go back to work.
I had a daycare in my home for several years. I worked very hard to make sure the children in my care had a day of fun, learning, and love. Some of my friends had their children in larger day cares and they were excellent too.
It is a problem with parenting and whether you are a single parent, two parent, stay at home, or day care family, it is a daunting task.
I am also a 6th grade teacher in an urban school district. This blog post was very uplifting in a time when teachers are demonized by politicians.

Donna, there is no need for your judgemental attitude. I imagine you are a bit insecure if you feel you need to denounce an entire swath of people for not living their lives the way you deem is ideal. Or perhaps you are simply so egocentric (in the literal meaning of the word) that you believe there is only one perspective (yours) that is valid. But I am not an idiot, yet I disagree with your assessment of The Way Things Should Be. My two daughters have a teacher dad who works ’round the clock, and sleeps only 4-5 hours a night during the school year, yet never says no when his children need his time. He adores his girls with every fiber of his being. She he have to sacrifice his truest, most complete happiness because he needs to work to survive? Or because, on his own, he would not be able to stay at home with them? Should he have deprived the world of two kind, brilliant, funny, geeky, beautiful, creative, artistic, insightful people because it does, in fact, take a village to raise them? I’m sure you are looking at me now, saying, “what about you?” Well, I work, part time, doing ultrasound in a high-risk OB office. My kids have been in daycare/preschool since very young. I work for numerous reasons: I need the money, because teachers aren’t paid enough and my children like to participate in activities outside of school and home, as do I. We are not wealthy by any means, but we do prefer not to live in squalor, and we like to pursue our interests and develop our minds and world views. I also work because I enjoy the sense if accomplishment and fulfillment I get from it, from achieving something, from contributing to society in more ways than one, from simply helping people. My girls see that I am a strong, self-sufficient, complete human being and I think I am a pretty good role model for them. Should everyone do this? No, this is what is best for US, in my view, and may not be what is best for anyone else – who am I to judge? I have only my own personality and interests and assume you have your own. Furthermore, having the ability to see my kids staying home with Dad two months of the year, I am fortunate to have special insight into this comparison of the two lifestyles, and I can tell you that my girls are happiest with the structure provided by school/daycare in combination with the social element that we do not have the ability to reproduce at home. They thrive on it. So don’t judge me for choosing to be the best person and parent that I know how to be because I am not you. Maybe, instead, you might begin to open up your mind to a less black-and-white world.

Donna, that’s a very harsh and judgmental attitude, to say if you want to work then you shouldn’t have had children. Both my husband and I love our jobs. We work for the public to make our town a better place. We also love our son, who began going to daycare at 4 months (GASP!!). We spend all of our time at home “there for him”. He has an arsenal of very caring, loving, and intelligent women at his daycare who are “there” for him. We very thoughtfully considered which center would be fit our families needs and values (and are paying out the wazoo for it). He is lucky enough to be part of a community of people, and so are we! He is learning to be kind and compassionate and accepting of others.
Could we afford for one of us to stay home? Of course! We could sell our house, downsize to one vehicle, cut out our “extras” like cable and cut coupons. Let me be clear: WE WOULD NOT BE HAPPY PARENTS, especially the parent who gave up the job they love! It is not selfish to have needs outside of your child. In fact, as a teacher, most parents who I think are dropping the ball are not fulfilled for whatever reason. Children may be “worse off” these days in your view, but two-income households aren’t the only option for why.

Perhaps we should all pray that God would help us to know the golden rule. When I was in second grade we played a game where we needed a partner. Jimmy was my partner. One day Jimmy didn’t come to school. I missed Jimmy and asked my teacher why Jimmy wasn’t at school. She said Jimmy went home to God where he would be happy. I was happy for Jimmy and found a new partner the next day. That was a long time ago…maybe too long. In 1865, some guy you may or may not have heard of in a time when so many young people were dying, he said, ” with malice towards none and charity for all, let us bind the nation’s wounds…” All through our history, which we tend to push off as history, our fathers and mothers have taught us to care about each other. Why is this new for this generation? Have we forgotten or just not learned the good news our parents and teachers should have taught us?

Except not everyone believes in god, so how does that help everyone?

Here in Ontario Canada The Catholic school system makes enough room to teach these values. Not so much from the catholic belief system but from a general standpoint.

I’m sorry, how are you making all of this money without learning how to do math? Most high-paying jobs require some advanced mathematics, and EVERY job requires math in some capacity. If you don’t ever want to do math, you can’t be any type of engineer, a doctor, an actuary (one of the highest paying jobs straight out of college in the US), among others. Most colleges require at least some Math.
Now, don’t get me wrong. I’m a senior in high school, and I’m a peer tutor in a general Algebra 1 class that has only freshman in it. I realize that most people hate doing math or feel that they aren’t very good at it. I know that most kids feel completely lost when doing math and that it “makes [them] dyslexic”. But that doesn’t mean you can’t learn it or don’t need it. You want to make video games? Learning how to code requires a lot of math. You want to start your own business? You need at least economics, and probably statistics, too. You want to be a doctor? The MCAT (med-school entrance exam) requires physics and chemistry, which both heavily rely on math. Actuarial science (be an actuary) is something you do with a major in mathematics.
If you want to get money and power, you need math.

It means “who would you like to sit with next week”

It means “who they want to sit with”. The “with” coming from the first word of the phrase “with whom they’d like to sit”. i.e. all at the same table.
I suffered a lot of depression and loneliness at school. What the teachers did to help was – move me to a different and more suitable class one year – support extracurricular programs that brought like students together. Unfortunately I also needed a counsellor which despite my obvious troubles over the years no teacher referred me. It was thought that I would probably ‘grow out of it’. But it got much, much worse.

It’s important for teachers to understand generally about mental health in students and to be supportive. However it’s much more important for teachers – and for the author of this article – not to believe the stigma. Those who commit mass murder are NOT THE SAME as people who suffer depression, bipolar, schizophrenia, etc. That is depression and loneliness does not equate to mass murder and is not the causative factor.

Those teachers of yours then only did half the job. They also needed an effective way to teach acceptance, friendlyness, etc. I’m sorry that you grew up think and feeling that way. I too felt lonely many times, and hated such lists (fortunatly they rarely happend to me), but I did find solace in a few close friends. I wish it had been what this article makes it out to be and I do hope you are happy where you are in life now.

Cate,

I totally feel you on this. Though I love the bigger picture of this idea of Chase’s teacher, and I love love love that Glennon is shining a light on all that is beautiful and important in teaching our children, I must admit, as a nervous Nelly/anxious child, it would have added a great deal of stress knowing others were choosing who to sit with, wondering if anyone would ever pick me. I know she is being very very careful how she implements it based on what she said, but I do have the same fears about how it really plays out in the fragile little hearts of those who are always on the brink of being crushed.

If the teacher is doing it right then no child would ever feel as you did. I have done this with my tutor groups and classes over the years. And after a few lessons on being fair, what it feels like to not be picked, not be noticed, be ignored, ALL of the students stop looking for their friends and start looking for everyone else. They actually take their focus away from their closest friends. I did this when I worked in primary and I’ve done this for many years in secondary. And given the opportunity and the guidance ALL children will start to see the good in others. Their are no friendship barriers in my classes. If a child is on their own someone will step up and sit with them, talk to them, and make them feel welcome.

I’m sorry you had such a rough time at school, but it seems to me that it was a combination of your own personal issues that were not addressed at school and home (counselling perhaps?) coupled with teachers who were inexperienced, distracted, or just thoughtless. Not every human being is caring. Not every teacher is – I had the misfortune of discovering a real bitch in my school only yesterday…And I wanted to shout at her for her unpleasant attitude about children. I was truly disgusted. But she is fortunately in the minority of teachers in the school system and the majority just want to help. Better that we try, and fail, with a minority of students such as yourself, than not bother at all and let down many…….

I read the article thinking it was a great idea, and wishing even just one of my teachers decades ago had done this. But you have a point, and now I’m sort of glad they didn’t, because what you described is exactly what would’ve happened. My classmates definitely would’ve talked about who they picked, and I was always the kid whom nobody would’ve picked. It would’ve been one more opportunity for ridicule, and I would’ve died several more times inside, while pretending to be unfazed. Now at age 45, people ask “How is it that you’re so smart/attractive/whatever, yet always alone?” I tell them “Don’t know, I’ve just never figured out how to connect with anyone, though it’s certainly not for lack of trying.”

Has she tried reaching out to someone else? Believe me, I know how hard that is in high school; I have painful memories of it. But might she be able to look for another quiet person, someone who isn’t part of the crowd, and say hello to them? I’m not saying she *should* and not at all that it would be easy, just thoughts. Someone else in choir or another activity or class? I do hope she finds someone with whom to connect.

Does she go to other activities that are more of a social gathering setting than Choir? Like sports events or dances? I have a friend who sounds a lot like your daughter. She was in choir and was an A student, she was super shy and even to today she doesn’t say much to me or any of my other friends but she always seems happy and content and we have been friends for 7yrs. The difference I see right now is that she made an effort to be noticed by a group and really just slid right on in. Once she opened up a little people got to know her and she is just the sweetest person I know. So my over all advice would be to get her to open up just a bit do something out of her conmfort zone (doesn’t have to be big), just give someone/anyone a chance to see the real her.

Hi Judith,
I’m fortunate that I have two very social and out going kids! Well, now adults and in college. My daughter did something every Friday through her entire 4 years of high school. She called it “make a friend Friday”. She would find someone that was sitting alone and simply walk up and ask if she could sit at their table to eat her lunch. Usually, she got a ok, a nod, or sometimes a grunt. But, she was never turned down. A few minutes later she would ask a simple question. It could be anything really. Just something to start a conversation. Soon, this lonely person sitting at the table had a new friend. I’ll cut the story short…she changed lives!!!!! That simple act changed lives! Why couldn’t your daughter try this? I know she’s shy. All she would have to do is look around and find someone that sitting alone and ask to sit at their table to eat her lunch. Give it a few seconds and ask a question. They could be planned questions so she wouldn’t be at a loss for words… Ok, time out!!! I had to send my daughter a text to find out what she would say. Here it is. “Hey! How are you doing (then can I sit with you) how’s your week going thus far or weekend plans etc” and “Then from there you get a sense of what they’re into (sports, movies, video games, robotics etc) then the conversation takes off from there”. Judith, I’m telling you, my daughter through this simple act and the friendships that followed made huge impacts on peoples lives. If you could get your daughter to try this one tiny thing (I know…easier said than done) your daughter could change her own life and that of others.

I am a huge advecate and believer in the animal therepy support programs offered. get your daughter a small pony or hampster or house rabbit and ask her teachers if she can bring it to her school for a few hours of social time tell them it is for therepeutic purposes of the school as a whole.
she should be prepared to answere questions as to what it is how old it is what it eats etc…. as animals are the key to coming out of her shell and into the world of being ” part of” it works if you are open minded and willing to step out of your comfort zone for your kids.

I’m so very sorry you went through that. What in the world is wrong with adults who don’t help keep these things in check?

Thanks so much for sharing your beautiful story! I loved it! If I ever teach an older grade where students can write warm fuzzies to each other, I’ll definitely try that out.

Thanks for sharing that 🙂

Hello fellow FACS teacher. I am concerned because our field is disappearing and we are the ones teaching and sharing the truly valuable part of life in our content. Hard to reach them if our programs aren’t there because they are not STEM enough.

That is what you took away from this Bill M.? Wow. Just wow.

Bill, you miss the point. It has nithing to do with CC. It is about taking the time to care and notice. CC is about seeing the there are no subjects…there is learning and its all interconnected. Not only is it interconnected, its inherently social and collaborative. CC is all about exactly what this teacher chose to do for decades before CC was named that.

From Wiki: “The Common Core State Standards Initiative is an education initiative in the United States that details what K-12 students should know in English language arts and mathematics at the end of each grade.”
I’m Canadian though, no skin in the game.

I was a special ed teacher and my last 4 years of teaching were as an Inclusion teacher. All my special ed students were in a regular classroom and it so happened that the majority were in one grade level, so I was the second teacher in the classroom with that grade level teacher. When I did a reinforcing lesson with my special ed group on the math lesson, or reviewed and re-taught a math lesson with my them, there was always one kid who wanted to join us at the table. He was an English-language learner and he knew he needed the extra help. I was always glad to see him willingly come to the table to go over the math instruction. I miss that aspect of my teaching career.

I agree, Robert Marmorstein.

Positive relationships, between teacher and student, and between student and student, are an essential foundation for learning.

But if we have no learning, it’s only a childcare facility. And at good childcare facilities, they love the children enough to teach them what they need to know.

As a teacher, I appreciate Glennon’s sharing of this teacher’s strategy, asking kids who they’d like to sit with as a means to observe who’s included and who’s left out. I plan to incorporate the idea in my own classroom. But I feel like, in her enthusiasm, Glennon overstated her point a bit.

Gosh, Robert -I took this whole thing as sarcasm. NO ONE can be this insipid. We agreed that math and reading are least important because that is what is being accomplished in the classroom – a loss of fundamental skills in favor of being kind and brave above all! You can’t develop a lesson plan for kindness; it must be shown as a standard of behavior. Positive character traits must be part of the environment; you can’t squish it into kids.

Are you serious? You say without learning it’s just a day care. Well I’m sure if you’d ever had any experience with child care you’d understand that there’s nothing but learning involved in the childcare setting.

I think it’s awesome that this teacher is showing an interest in where the chn are coming from where they’re heading and what’s going on behind the scenes. It’d be great to be able to see what’s done with the info to help these kids but I understand that would be breaking confidentially.

It is a mistake, indeed. But it’s also a mistake to assume that parents aren’t doing their share either. Many parents get their kids therapies outside of school, but kids are in school ALL day, and that is where the bulk of the social interactions happen. I personally know of at least two families (in my very well-funded, good school district) whose children have actual ASD diagnoses, but because those children are doing well academically and are able to “access the curriculum” and are not a behavior problem, the school won’t give them any social development help. During the school day, it’s the school district’s job to make sure kids aren’t falling through the cracks. Not the teacher’s job. The school’s job. What this teacher is doing is great, but it’s just one, small step, and unfortunately, not enough for kids with serious social problems. Most teacher’s don’t have the time or energy to give that kind of support, and most of them are not qualified to give it. Everyone is treating this article like it is a solution to the problem. It’s just showing us how big the problem truly is. When I read it, all I could think of was how, figuring out which kids need help is of little value when we’re not even helping the kids we’ve already identified as needing it.