I love this. I get it. The whole facing your Fear things head on does make sense. But I kept wondering…does the above advice apply to spiders? As far as facing them head on? Because I can’t see it when it comes to spiders.

Thank you for this! There were three things I have been putting off for awhile including my yearly well woman exam, the dermatologist (she is scalpel happy and it scares me) and the dentist, because I have a tooth that’s been bugging me. I was inspired by your post, bit the bullet and scheduled all three in a week. Check, check, check! They’re all done. The dermatologist found a few suspicious moles (waiting on biopsy) and the dentist referred me to an oral surgeon. I wonder how many other people you lit a fire under that have NOT commented? You’re awesome!

I went to the dermatologist to have a spot on my arm looked at that I should have done 8 months ago (but instead we moved and I had a baby and well, I kept putting it off). Today the doctor said it looked like basal cell and loped that sucker off to send to pathology. Thank you for reminding all of us that we can do hard, necessary things.

I went to the counsellor my doc referred me to, and I told her ALL the scary things. And there were lots.

Also, I’m praying my socks off for you.

x

I fiiinally got my (second) mammogram that I put off for 2 yrs. Luckily, it came back normal. I did that before your post, but your post also helped me send two difficult emails to 2 people with whom I needed to communicate. Those are two “weights off my shoulders.” I have many other hard things to do, but that’s enough for right at this moment. I will continue to hold onto your message in the back of my mind and do the other things, bit by bit. This was one of my favorite entries. I thought about saying, “Thanks for the kick in our Monkee butts”, but I’ve decided it’s more of a “Love Shove.” 🙂 Doesn’t that sound like a Glennon-ism?

Made 3 Dr. Appts I have been avoiding. Made them for all in the same day.One day of hard things….consolidating nervous wait times as well. Whew! That wasn’t so bad.
Thanks for the push in the right direction.

You should run for president. I would vote for you ten times

I emailed the friend who I used to call my best friend but who I thought bore me a grudge for some reason. I was pleased to hear back that she also regretted our losing touch and wants to fix things. The hard things are sometimes not as hard as our minds make them out to be.

I am way too hormonal to be on your site today; tears welling up in my eyes. The reason I came here today was to look for resources to do my hard thing. We are going to visit my sister, way across the country, tomorrow. I have two daughters, ages 10 & 14. They do not “know” that their beloved Aunt is gay. But they do know her committed life partner/fiancee, who has been a part of her life for as long as the girls can remember. My sister and her partner have lived in California for 4 years, and we’ve not visited yet; when we arrive it will be pretty clear that they share a home, a room and a bed. I am struggling with how to talk to them about this, because I don’t want to impart any negative stereotypes or cause the girls to feel awkward (ie, thinking only about sex & sexuality) when they see my sister and her fiancee. I feel terrible for having put this off so long, and now we are at the dead last minute.

Well, I did it. I had the suspicious mole removed from my right, upper, inner thigh. I had to position myself in such an awkward way and was already so tense… not to mention the mole being inches from my panty line. The doctor looked at me at one point and asked if I was going to faint. How do you explain to a man you dont know that you are thinking so many crazy thoughts? Like… OMG, what if this is SOMETHING. And, if it IS SOMETHING how could I have let it go on so long. And, did I shave well enough? As scary as it was I am so relieved that is it over (for now). I did it. I faced it. Three stiches. Now, to wait for the results. Thanks so much for giving me the courage to do it. I know I would have put it off longer if I didnt remind myself that worry is fear without a plan. I will never worry the same again! xo

I have never commented on here, and still feel absolutely silly considering so many people are facing challenges much larger than I.

My challenge is to wake up every day and not let my generalized anxiety over take me – or the sweet baby in my belly. I lost a baby last year and the fear of losing this one – coupled by the fact that I cannot take my anxiety medications – almost paralyzes me with fear every day. I do not want to be fearful. I want to be strong and positive and hopeful. If I can’t do this for myself, at the very least, I can do this for my child who deserves to be welcomed into this type of environment. I don’ t think anyone really knows how much I struggle, if my husband really knew, he would be afraid to be with me. So I got a therapist and I keep on keeping on each day….each day that brings me closer to holding my baby.

A few weeks ago I felt a lump in breast and then toyed with going in for a solid 2 weeks to get it checked out. Last thursday I went into my doctor, by monday I was into the clinic for a mammogram and ultra sound and meeting with the radiologist. It turned out to be healthy breast tissue just kind of in a squishy lump that will go away in time. I am not going to lie, it was nerve wracking saying the words out loud “I found a lump in my breast”. I came home from my appointment, and checked in with momastery….something I do irregularly. Well you can imagine how the dots connected for me with this post, since I had just come back from seeing the radiologist and doing my hard thing. Here was a major dot to dot life connection for me. The doctor asked me what made me come in? I said to her “well I got to thinking..I am a mom (kids are 5 and 7), I am a wife, I am a daughter, I am a sister, I am a friend….and I was being selfish to think that this only affected me. Sure it’s my body but I have responsibility in this world” She quietly did her thing and then said “you know that’s interesting what you said, it’s like if we hear a rattle in our car and ignore it and then all of the sudden a tire falls off on the highway or something…suddenly our little problem is a big problem for everyone on the highway!” Exactly. For me it was about seeing the big picture, living beyond my own little nose! And I am from Canada, a shout out to the Canadian readers…we have NO excuse at all for not going into the doctor if we need. We don’t have to worry about paying out of pocket for appointments and expensive procedures and x rays, it is all covered by our health care. It was a measly 3 hours of my life, totally free, to get the all clear. Best 3 hours I’ve spent in a long time.

Okay, so I’m two days late to International Hard Thing Day, but I did it 🙂 I am and always have been super uncomfortable asking for time off of work, especially when it falls at a rather inconvenient time for the company. Just the other day I realized I had a trip booked over a weekend where we have two big company events, and I was terrified to talk to my boss about not being there. BUT, today I just sat down with her right when I got into the office and told her about the trip, and she just said “Ooh, okay, well we can work it out. We have plenty of people—we’ll be fine.” Not so hard after all 🙂

Sorry, I’ve been out of touch. I’ve been having to do the drive by as I’ve adjusted to working full-time and helped a small person adjust to having all of his siblings gone to college away from home. These are just excuses. But they are my life. Bygones… What I mean to say is I laughed SO SO SO HARD as I read over your list. I too have those moments when the moon is out and the husband snores on (and on). And this week alone, I am facing like 4 of the things on that list! The dentist, the library fines, the call to the tax man, the budget. So thank you for helping me do the hard things.

G, I’m waiting with you, girl. And in the meantime, I’m doing as many scary, hard things as I can in an effort to send positive, healing energy to YOU and ALL who are in “wait-mode” for the news. The Unknown is HARD.

My own very hard thing is acknowledging that I can unite people for Good Works. I have this AMAZING group of “Gorges Mamas” In Ithaca, NY who answered my half-assed “Who’s in?” message regarding an Ithaca Mother’s Day Zach Attack. You know how many we have in our group? THIRTY-TWO! That’s how many Gorges Mamas said “YES! Let’s DO this thing.” And we’re GOING to!!! For 100 deserving Mamas in centrally-isolated Ithaca, NY, we’re putting together sumptuous, glorious, generous self-, personal-, emotional-care packages. Which is tremendously awe-some and tremendously scary.

But let’s be honest…What if I can’t sustain expectations to Keep Doing Good Things? What if my ego gets in the way and makes me do silly, self-serving things instead of things for the Greater Good? What if I can’t keep the Facebook page up to date? What if…I’m not as good as Glennon? Well, the answer to THAT is that I’m not YOU! YOU are the only YOU and I’m the only ME. And that’s gotta be good enough. But you DO a DARNED good job of illuminating a path for others to follow. So thank you. A million thank yous. Count them whilst you wait. Might take you to Thursday and past Wednesday entirely!

Also, I called the dentist to make an appointment to fill a cavity. So there’s that.

And I’m keeping you company. Love.

Oh G.

Wow. You know that my Scary Anxiety has lately latched onto melanoma? I’m fine. But every spot, spick, freckle, nick freaks me the hell out.

But do you want to know what I did last week? I went to counseling. And I kept going. And that was my Big Scary Thing.

And today, my Hard Thing is breathing.

And so far I’m doing it. I’m doing it even though I’m curled up in the fetal position, the weight of self-hatred, past issues, anxiety, depression, and crushing worry pressing around me on all sides.

But I’m pushing back. I’m breathing and praying and going to counseling and I am fighting back.

Thanks. I’ll be praying for you! I know how scary that is.

Rock on,

SB

I consolidated all the credit cards and signature loans that paid off past credit card balances onto one loan. And we are paying off all of one car and part of another, also with that loan, in order to lower our payments. And the best part is the loan is from our 401k so when we pay interest on it, we are paying it to our retirement fund!
The best part is I have my husband on board, finally, to quit using credit cards and make a budget!

Made and went to my dermatology appointment. Now need to have four spots removed and sent off for biopsy. THANK YOU for the nudge. Feeling a bit overwhelmed, but grateful I went. Hopeful to hear good things with you soon.

Just paid my library fines. Thanks!

Glennon:

I was diagnosed with skin cancer almost 9 years ago in almost the same place your biopsy looks to be. It was basal cell, which is rarely fatal, but after several surgeries to remove the cancer and plastic surgery to close the wound, I was left feeling oddly emotional and fragile–and guilty for feeling that way since my cancer wasn’t serious. Luckily, I had a wonderful doctor who told me that it was okay to feel how I was feeling–so I’m passing her truth along to you. No matter what your biopsy reveals, it’s okay for you to feel how you feel. Biopsies are scary. A cancer diagnosis (however mild) is scary.

I’m happy to report that I’ve been cancer free since my diagnosis and treatment. I wear my nearly two inch scar across my cheek as a reminder that I can face hard things.

I am sending prayers for a great outcome for you!

My hard thing: scheduled biopsy and ultrasound to deal with weird painful underarm issue. After a few months I realize it ain’t going away by itself. So besides imagining my kids motherless due to whatever horribleness could be casing my problem, at least I have a plan. Now, the waiting…the hardest part! Anyone else have thoughts like, “okay, even if this is gonna kill me just let me have 8 more years to get my kids raised/out of high school, that’s the minimum I need”? Anyone?

My super, crazy, unbelievably hard thing – I am taking my IUD out next week! After years of infertility, three miscarriages, and a pregnancy that nearly killed me and my child, we are taking the VERY scary step of trying for child #2. I’ve only just barely entered a recession of my depression, and TTC means severe PTSD attacks and all other kinds of mayhem. But I AM DOING IT! Every single prayer, big or small, to whomever you pray, would be so, so, so much appreciated!!

How timely. I just had a skin check a couple of weeks ago, and they found something (I’m 37! Way too young!). They took off the mole, and then they found more when they biopsied it (Still 37 and too young!). Today, I just went in and they took even more skin from me, and I now have a 3 inch slit in my back with inside and outside stitches. Talk about a bitchin’ look when I go overseas in exactly 2 weeks! Hugs to you, Glennon. .

Wow! You guys are all incredible! Glennon, you must be so thrilled right now! Woohoo!! I was also wondering how we contact you for non-business, non-function related things. I sent an email to the business email address, because I wasn’t sure where else to send it. It wasn’t anything terribly important, but I wanted to be sure it would get to you. Thanks!!

I did my hard thing: Jumped on the scale because I HAVE to face the number and embrace that using food as a coping mechanism is.not.good. I KNOW that, but it’s just easier to ignore my clothes getting snug and blame it in bloating or whatever. I’ve struggled with my weight my entire adult life. I’ve had victory in weight loss but in keeping it off? Notsomuch. So, I’m staring the number eye-to-eye, working up the courage to do The Next Hard Thing: Take off my cape, be vulnerable, admit I can’t do it all on my own and that in order to overcome depression I may need to set aside my pride and see a professional. But, one hard thing at a time… !!

Sitting here reading through the newest posts and crying. Glennon ~ look at what you’ve done! I am 100% positive that you have saved lives through this.

I have another hard thing I didn’t think of yesterday, and it has become one of those the-longer-I-put-it-off-the-worse-it-could-get things. Nope, not health. I was the victim of identity theft last year. A bank with whom I had never done business let someone open a credit card in my name and racked up $23,000 worth of purchases in a month. Thanks be to God the bank knew it was their fault (when they caught it) and I didn’t have to try to prove it wasn’t me.

I spent two freakin’ months calling people, making reports, dealing with credit bureaus, getting credit cards replaced, etc. It was as if I had picked up a part-time job. Because they put my husband’s name on the card as an authorized user, I had to do everything twice.

There are still pieces of that I need to finish up, and one of them is dealing with Social Security. I tried, but I got wrong information on the phone, then l was told I could do it online, but the site wouldn’t let me, then the government shut down for 15 days. After two months solid of working on it, I lost my momentum. So I have to go to to an office in person, and I don’t know if I have to have an appt., and I’ll no doubt have to bring my husband (whose schedule isn’t as flexible as mine is), and I *need* to do this. But I don’t want to have to wait on hold for 1/2 an hour or longer and I want it all to go away without me checking back with the credit bureaus to make sure all that was supposed to happen, happened, and that no one has gotten back into our information. I keep telling myself I will get to it. Soon.

Nineteen years ago today, I pushed my first child out of my vagina and into this world. That was a hard thing! But giving birth was empowering, and I remember thinking that if I could do THAT, I could do anything. Eventually, though, fatigue and fear and frustration and inertia and all the paralyzing thoughts and feelings crept back in, and hard things seemed impossible, and easy things felt hard again. Of course, I’ve faced and fought and overcome (and succumbed to) plenty of hard stuff over the last 19 years, and I will continue to do so tomorrow, and forever more. But today, my hard thing is the post office. TODAY, I will wrap and package and deliver and mail two Christmas presents that I purchased six months ago, then avoided dealing with day after day after day… Today, I will enjoy the freedom of having 13.5 pounds and 180 days of guilt lifted from my shoulders. Thanks, Glennon!

I finally made dentist appointments for myself and my older son. I won’t be able to cancel and reschedule mine because I would need to explain to my son why I have to reschedule both of our appointments.

Now to call that friend.

My hard thing sounds really silly but it is to take my migraine free day and clean my house. With chronic migraines, my house gets out of control quickly since I can’t function very well many days. So today instead of lamenting it, I will get up and do it. Then at least when the pain comes back, I won’t be staring at a giant mess. A little peace in my journey in caring for myself.

I scheduled the colonoscopy. It’s my eighth in the last 15 years, but this one is harder because my ulcerative colitis was far more active last year while I was pregnant. I’m more afraid they might find something this time.

My hard thing may seem small but I faced the hard truth that my weight was getting out of control since the birth of my twins two years ago. I hated the way I looked in the mirror, the way my clothes fit, the way people might be viewing me. So I did my hard thing…I got myself to the gym for all eyes to see and judge and started working with a personal trainer to feel better about myself. I Can Do Hard Things!!!!

I am doing the VERY HARD THING. I am 41 with 4 beautiful, crazy, insanely wonderful boys and a pretty cool husband. But here I am, writing to you from a Residential treatment center. See I finally decided to address my 28 year old eating disorder. I have been gone from home now for close to two months (I had to start in an inpatient hospital program first). Every day I’m here not only do I face the brutal reality of trying to live life without my eating disorder and alcohol, but also the pain of missing my boys hits me anew and hard every day. I have hope for my recovery but I will say that DAMN this is HARD.

Paid my library fines today. Also made an account on Mint.com. It was this post that pushed me to do it. Thanks, G. <3 It was also a huge reminder of the things I need to see the doctor for when my insurance kicks in, in June. I have a list that I've been neglecting, it's time to stop.

I’ve been thinking about this all day, and a series of events made me realize what my thing is.
I still have the teeny embryo of our baby I lost in miscarriage… in a plastic baggie in a cabinet in my bathroom. I’ve been scared to bury him or her because what if an animal digs it up? And if i bury it in our backyard, and we move, I don’t want to leave it. That would be my really hard thing.
But I know my baby is up in heaven waiting and saving a place for me. Time to start looking for a memory stone or a really nice flowering plant and say a real goodbye, because that was a REAL loss. :*(

I wrote the email that I’ve needed to write for over a year. And I clicked send this time. The friendship is already really over, but at least now she might understand why. Someone needs to write a book about how difficult friend break-ups are. Because I seriously think they may be worse than romantical break-ups. Friends know our souls! This one has been so HARD.

Believe it or not, I have to pay my library fines… Love all you do, Glennon.

*gulp* I will call my sister’s doctor tomorrow. She has been telling me and telling me I need to try a doctor who is going to actually listen to me but I have had so many reasons not to… like um…. er….. like……. work! yeah yeah… that’s it…. and um….what if they don’t take my insurance……I am going to call the doctor first thing in the morning… and I am also going to call the ENT for my poor son…

I can do this…….. right?

Tomorrow. Physical. First (ahem) ever. Two babies and c-sections do not count as worthwhile long term healthcare plans. I was so close to rescheduling about a million times but I owe US all the honor of the TRUTH. ( but I wish those paper gowns were cuter and had a giant WARRIOR logo on it!) Tomorrow is also my dad’s quarterly PET scan. Warrior-ing and praying will be my to- do list.

So. I did the thing. I made the apt. I’m not real happy about it. It’s going to involve me and a Russian doctor in a room. I may smack somebody. I’m just saying’…
The ‘hard thing’ will then be avoiding arrest. I can’t believe I am doing what your blog told me to do. I don’t think that will work as a defence in a court of law, right? Peace out.