Feb 112010

I was never good at hide and seek, because I’d always make enough noise so my friends would be sure to find me. I don’t have anyone to play those games with anymore, but now and then I make enough noise just in case someone is still looking and hasn’t found me yet. – Brian Andreas

Is it possible that you Lovies aren’t sick of me yet? I have been writing to you every weekday morning for six months now. SIX MONTHS. I worry that you sit down at the computer each morning, click on Momastery and think “Good Lord, she wrote AGAIN? Take a breath, woman.”

But then I tell myself maybe not though, because the truth is that I never get sick of you and your comments. I love getting to know you Monkees, you supporters, you little slices of hope who love me and each other for no apparent reason. You just keep showing up…and you make my days, my life, deeper and funnier and better.

I was hiding for a long time. Six months ago I started missing you, without even knowing you. Hiding alone is too quiet and boring and cramped, and the anticipation of being surprise found always makes me pee in my pants a little. I prefer just to make noise and get found on purpose. Thank you for finding me and helping me stand up and come out of hiding.

I would like to offer you a gift in return for finding me. Diane once wrote in a comment that “the most revolutionary thing you can do is introduce people to each other.” Yesterday, when Krystal said that she liked writing on her blog because it helped her keep memories, I thought – Krystal has a blog? I can’t think of many things I’d rather do than read Krystal’s blog. I want to get to know her better. I’d like to get to know all of you better, if you’re up for it. Sometimes we feel isolated at home or in the office or just in our panicked, jittery heads – and finding a kindred spirit online can be like stepping out of the rain and into a friend’s cozy house. For me, since the Lymie Mono has left me unable to remain vertical for longer than two hours at a time, online is the only way to visit a friend. I get a little scared and stressed, what with all my diseases and children, and visiting with you makes me less so. I’d like to know you better. And I’d like you to know each other better.

I was thinking, if you’d like the Monkees to visit you, would you leave the URL of your blog in the comments or email it to me? And if you don’t have a blog or are shy about yours, but you know of another blogger or a website that offers you a soft place to land, would you consider sharing it? I’ll make a list of Monkee bloggers and of Monkee Recommended Sites and post them here, so that when you need to call for reinforcements, you’ll know where to go.

In Monkee Love-


PS. We have almost 40 inches of snow on the ground, and yesterday, due to blizzard conditions, it became illegal to drive. Craig stepped over the tantruming, bored-out-of-their-skulls children, put on his boots and said that he was going to “drive around and try to get arrested.” Then he proceeded to explain that he’d be “more likely to get fed and less likely to have to break up fights” in a jail cell than at home. That man is brilliant. All of this family time is making me miss the big house.

PPS. Tiffany and Heather M won our “Monkees in the Hood” contest. Free Hoodies coming your way! Comment or email your preferred sizes, please. Congrats!

Carry On, Warrior
Author of the New York Times Bestselling Memoir CARRY ON, WARRIOR
Join the Momastery on-line community on Facebook, Twitter & Pinterest

Feb 092010

Just we.

Not better. Just Simpler.

Things were simpler then.

Just us, no she.

It really wasn’t

A cry

That first noise

It was a fanfare

Announcing a marvel that will never

Be repeated.

There are no satin wraps

There are no handmaidens

No emissaries with jewels

No trumpets of announcement

Where are they?

Where the hell are they?

Don’t they know what has happened here?

A princess has arrived.

But it’s no matter.

The queen touches

The still damp princess

the room is filled.

Not an inch remains.

The sound and fullness of love

Excludes all else.

They couldn’t enter or be heard were they here.

Times of only you and she.

No room for me.

It is right.

As it Should Be.

Time spent worried

About things I might

Not know how to handle…

Only to find

It was She

Who handled me.

How many times

Will she turn around?

How many birthdays

Will there be?

Before we turn around.

And where you sit

Will be


Happy Fourth Birthday, Patricia Faith.
I love you this much.

*Poem written by Bubba, as a Christmas gift to Tisha in 1976, the year their first daughter, Glennon, was born.

She, She, and She

Carry On, Warrior
Author of the New York Times Bestselling Memoir CARRY ON, WARRIOR
Join the Momastery on-line community on Facebook, Twitter & Pinterest

Feb 082010

I have a Monkee friend named Aprile, whose son and Chase were in the same class last year. Aprile and I never talked much back then, but I liked her, mostly because she stood in the back with me at class parties and laughed at all of my inappropriate jokes. Aprile seemed to think I was funny, and to be quite honest, this is my favorite quality in a person. Plus, she didn’t seem to take herself too seriously, and I noticed that she was gentle to all the kids, not just the really cute, overtly lovable ones.

So over the summer…I sent Aprile a link to the blog. This is the way I test out potential friends. It makes life so easy, because I always know by their responses whether we’re a match or not. The same time I sent Momastery to Aprile, I sent it to another mom from Chase’s class. The other mom wrote this back a week later:

Hi Glennon. That was…nice. Thank you for sharing.

Oops. Not a match.

But Aprile wrote back the following, 24 hours later:

I stayed up all night reading every post. I need to tell you all of my secrets. Can we have coffee?


We met at Starbucks and Aprile told me about her challenging childhood, her fears and joys about being a wife and mother, and her difficulty finding friends in our area. There was no small talk. It was nice.

But something that Aprile shared with me that day has driven me batty for the past few months.

Aprile said that when she comes to our children’s school events, she always feels completely insecure and left out, just like she did in high school. She said that all the moms seem to have their own cliques, and that she usually just stands uncomfortably off to the side, by herself. After Aprile shared this with me, I kept hearing the same story again and again from other women.

Kay. I find this situation to be COMPLETELY UNNACCEPTABLE. Nobody should have to go through high school twice. For the love of God, NO. Not on our watch, Monkees. We might not be able to save the world, but we can make our neighborhoods and schools safer and sweeter for other women just like us.

Remember these signs?

When I walked to and from my elementary school every day, I saw these signs in the window of every third house or so. These signs were a signal that the house was a SAFE HOUSE, and the people inside were SAFE PEOPLE. If students walking to school ever felt lost or scared or alone, they could find a house with this sign, knock on the door and a kind person would welcome and help them..

THAT, my friends, is what I’m talking about. That is how Revolutionary Monkees ROLL.

I now present, Monkee SAFE HOUSE SIGNS.

Note the hood, which is crucial because it is very hard and brave to try not to be a jerk, and Monkees get tired. The hoods serve as socially acceptable paper bags, in a pinch. So if you see a Monkee out and she has her hood up, give her some time before approaching. Also, yes…we decided not to print the Momastery website on the sweatshirt, because we’re really not promoting anything other than kindness.

My favorite artist, Joey, designed these for us and Sunny brought them to life. Sunny also has, along with Susie, volunteered to field all of our orders and ship the hoodies to us. Sunny and Susie have volunteered for this job because they love us, even though they have ten children between them, and have just launched new marriages, degrees, and businesses.

I emailed Sunny early in this project and said “Sunny, I think a LOT of people are going to order these sweatshirts. I’m afraid it’s going to be a hard job. Are you sure you want to take this on?”

Sunny responded with the following sentence:

“Sister, hard is the only kind of job I know how to do.”

You can imagine how I feel about Sunny.

So here’s the skinny on the hoodies. The factory is charging us $15 for each one. Shipping should be $2 or $3, we’re going to charge $3 because I don’t want Sunny to get stuck with any extra cost. There was some talk about charging more, and sending the extra to charity. I love that idea, but my gut is telling me that the most important thing to do first is to take care of each other. SO…if you’d like to send a few extra bucks, please do. Whatever Sunny receives on top of the $18, we’re going to save in a Monkee Hoodie Fund, which will be used to buy hoodies for Monkees who at the moment, don’t have $18 to spend on themselves.

In this tough economy, we’ve all tried harder to distinguish between needs and wants. Here at Momastery, we are in unanimous agreement that Monkee Hoodies are NEEDS. Don’t you dare be shy, if you are a Monkee and you can’t afford this right now, please email and tell Sunny your size and address, anyway. Do it for the Revolution…we’ve got your back. Hoodies come in adult sizes, S, M, L, and XL and will take about two weeks to get to you. All Monkee Hoodie questions and orders should be sent to Sunny and Susie at monkeehoodie4u(at)yahoo(dot)com.

I know that for some of you, Momastery is a hiding place where you come to get away from the world’s noise. Because of this, a lot of you haven’t shared Momastery with your friends. I completely understand this…but now might be time to start thinking differently. I think it’s time to take the Monkee Revolution to the streets. If this remains a hiding place, then I’m not really sure it’s a Revolution at all. As far as I’m concerned, the more Monkeess in the Hood out there, the better. We need a Monkee at every mall, bus stop, yoga studio, PTA meeting, church, and tupperware party from sea to shining sea. Consider sending your favorite few posts to other potential Monkees. “Invite” your friends on facebook to the fan page. Keep in mind that the first rule of the Revolution is that everyone is invited, and the second is that we treat others how we want to be treated. So if, you’d want to be invited, it follows that you might want to invite. Besides, your friends are gonna see you in your hoodie anyway, and wonder why you held out on them.

One final, important thing: in an effort to inspire revolution momentum, tonight at 10, I will randomly choose ONE NEW FOLLOWER from today to receive a free hoodie! To become a follower, just click on “follow,” set up a google account, and give your real or fake name. The process takes about 45 seconds, which, ahem, is about 7,155 seconds fewer than it took me to write this post. The free hoodie will not be funded by our general hoodie fund, it will be funded by Craig. Who I just know is going to be SO excited about this opportunity as soon as I find a good time to share it with him.

Hush, honey. It’s all for the Revolution.

In Monkee Love-


Carry On, Warrior
Author of the New York Times Bestselling Memoir CARRY ON, WARRIOR
Join the Momastery on-line community on Facebook, Twitter & Pinterest