May 162013

Still on the road, Lovies. Remember this one?
Originally published August 2009.

The other night when Craig got home from work, I went to the bookstore to blow off some steam. Not a bar called The Bookstore…the actual book store. Borders. I know, somebody stop me.

Anyway…I’m sitting in the café with my latte and a pile of classic novels that I plan to start reading just as soon as I get caught up on the Gosselins…when I notice this guy across the cafe staring at me.

Here was my first thought:

OH MY GOSH maybe he recognizes me from the blog!!! Maybe I am ACTUALLY FAMOUS but I am just so humble and grounded that I don’t even know it. But then I remembered that the only two men who read my blog are my dad and my neighbor Pablo, and this guy didn’t look like either of them.

So my next thought was this:


And then, while I was mentally rehearsing how to relay this story to Craig, thus proving my desirability beyond a shadow of a doubt, the guy stood up and started walking toward me.

Oh, no. Oooooooh noooooooo. I am secretly terrified of boys.

“Excuse me ma’am? Ma’am? I’m sorry to interrupt you.”

“Umm…that’s okay.”

“I just thought you might want to know. When you went to get your drink I couldn’t help but notice that you have stickers all over your back. There’s like twenty of them back there.”

Thank you, Tish. Thank you very much.

Carry On, Warrior
Author of the New York Times Bestselling Memoir CARRY ON, WARRIOR
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  32 Responses to “Still Got It”

  1. OMG. This slays me. So funny!

  2. Gawd, how I love your Tish – quite a classic Tish Story! I’m thinking if you start putting these “events” down – you’ll have enough for another book…………..SOON!! 😉 Then you AND Tish can go on book tour together! 😉

  3. Hilarious! At least he had the decency to come and tell you!

  4. Bwwahhhh hahahaha that is SO AWESOME!!!!

  5. LOL! Great story!

  6. Big laughter! So priceless! love!

  7. This made me smile.

  8. I am 67 years old and was reading a lovely story to my almost 5 year old granddaughter when she looked up at me and said “I really like your little mustache”…see, they do it to grandmothers too!

    • What a beautiful memory made.

    • Too funny – my little nephew, who was 3 years old and the most loving, snuggable little thing in the world and for who I would do absolutely ANYTHING said to me one day, “Aunt Susie, you have a mustache! But just a little one!” (and made the “little” with his fingers!) To this day, my husband like to remind me that I have a mustache! Kids say the funniest things!

  9. Even when they’re not with you sometimes your children can still make you stand out in a crowd. :)

  10. Yesterday was the first day I was able to go to a program at my son’s new school. He picked out my outfit, demanded that I blow my hair out, and checked twice that I would be putting my makeup on before I came to the school. Nothing keeps us humble like small children.

  11. I walked through the mall with my son ~5 months old on my hip, quickly after work one afternoon. Everyone kept staring at me and I thought they thought he was a cutie or I was still a hottie. When I arrived at the car and looked down to put him in his car seat I realized that he had hooked one side of my cross- tied shirt UNDER my bra. Unfortunately, It was not my “good” bra….

  12. I knew when he started with “excuse me, ma’am” that is wasn’t going to end well. It rarely goes, “excuse me ma’am, I just had to tell you, your beauty is beyond compare”.
    But, I’m sure when he was telling his friends all about the “sticker lady” he called you pretty :)

  13. I walked around with a clean diaper velcroed to my butt last night, if that makes you feel better!

  14. laughed out loud. totally been there :)

  15. Bhahhaha! To be honest, even though I was waiting for a surprise ending, I wasn’t expecting this. It reminded of good ol’ times, when I went out with smiley stickers on where my nipples would be on my shirt. Thanks to my son.

  16. At least they were stickers and not boogers! Yeah. That was fun when my co-worker told me at 3 pm that I had a huge boogie on my shoulder (black shirt). I had been in meetings all day. So had the boogie. Love those little boogie monsters!

  17. Lovely! What a brave guy, there was probably real risk of the latte ending up on him. Sigh. So is the glam mom life.

  18. Several years ago, I was driving in Northern CA on a beautiful summer day. I had to stop for gas and there was another car there– a gorgeous convertible with an equally gorgeous man filling it up. The breeze was blowing my hair in a way I imagined to be very attractive, and the cute guy looked at me for a moment and smiled, and I was feeling great. And then I noticed that my minivan was literally rocking– because I had the a carload of children on the way to summer camp with me and they were going nuts inside. Oh well.

  19. Yeah, baby, you’ve still got it! Loved this and love you.

  20. My granddaughter, Waverly, 21 months, gets stickers for kind and helpful behavior. When I come over, she takes her sticker sheet and doles out stickers to me. I spent Mother’s Day very proudly wearing four of them, across my belly (where she can reach) including one upside-down Mickey Mouse. From where I’m sitting those stickers are signs of good behavior and love. Good for you, Mama!

  21. I LOVE THIS… still got it!

  22. What I love? That Craig let you go out of the house with stickers all over your back!

    Ah, men.

  23. lol … have you ever let the kids do your hair, then forget that you’ve had a “makeover” and answer the door? /guilty

    I think one of their main purposes of being on earth is to keep us humble.

  24. I think you still DO have it going on . . . otherwise why was he checkin out your back side?? huh??? :)

  25. It’s happened to the best of us! :)

  26. Love this. I was thinking of you this morning. It’s my birthday today and all my 4 year old did this morning was whine and not listen to a thing I told her to do. I finally said… you know what today is? (what, mamma?) It’s my BIRTHDAY! (silence) And you know that that means? (what, mamma?). You have to be NICE TO ME. (bursts into tears… whines… but I want to go to your birfday paaarrtteeee). Ah, the joys of motherhood. :) Thanks for the smiles and reminders that we’re not alone.

    • Happy Birthday! Sto Lat! Omedetou Gozaimasu! I hope that you get some cuddles and what your heart desires :0

  27. along the same vein, sorta…dropped big kids off today, walk to CVS, walk around said CVS trying to get youngest asleep. She wants ‘uppie’. I finally let her out of the stroller, pick her up and she throws up all over me. yup, thanks, kiddo.

    • It’s even better when you don’t find the stains until later, those moments when you are out by yourself and realize you are wearing a shirt with baby markings all over it. Or just a couple of conspicuous ones. Looks worse when there’s no kid there to blame for it.

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