Aug 272012
 

 

It’s gonna be a long one, Lovies, feel free to take coffee and pee breaks.

First, WELCOME HOME to all of the Monkees (3,000 of you) who found us during the past few days. As I told Craig last night, we love you so much already. We would have anyway, ‘cause that’s our rule, but I especially love that you found us because you were moved in some way by our Adam letter. That Adam. He’s doing a heck of a lot of good. Please, put your feet up and make yourselves at home. Here, We Belong to Each Other, so introduce yourself or stay quiet –  just be yourself in the truest way. We’d like you to stay forever.

I’m going to break this post into two parts:

  1. What’s going on in my (our) OUTSIDE WORLD and
  2. What’s going on my (our) INSIDE WORLD

 

Sometimes I forget to tell you about OUTSIDE world happenings because they seem so much less significant than INSIDE world happenings. And then all of a sudden you see me in Hollywood with Mark Burnett and Roma Downey and 30,000 of you are like – “G, WHAT ON THE HECK?”  Newbies- that’s a Tish-ism we’ve adopted.

 

 

 

So here’s a brief version of the Hollywood story. Several producers in Hollywood have been following the Monkee Revolution carefully. They contacted our agent. They requested meetings with Sister and me. We said, “Um. Okay.” They flew us to LA. My mama and Bobby (5 weeks old!) came, too. I was super excited, mostly to write the following status update. I bought the cardigan two months ahead of time, for just such a time as this.

Hopped Off the Plane at LAX, With a Dream and My Cardigan….

 

 

It is a very confusing thing- to be headed to Hollwood to meet with fancy, fancy folks. At first, I wasn’t sure how to approach the trip in the Monkee-ist way. But it hit me three days prior that all I had to do was be myself and treat every person whom I was blessed enough to meet – from taxi drivers to waitresses to producers – with the same measure of reverence. I wanted to LEARN from each person.  That would be success. I went with NO OTHER agenda than this. So really, when I hopped off the plane at LAX, all I had was a cardigan. No big Hollywood dream. In my heart there is NO DREAM bigger or better than this place, than our Momastery. The miracles that happen here in hearts and between hearts is, for me, as good as it gets. My dream is done, which is So Relaxing. So I went to LA with nothing to lose and no angle and just a big HERE I AM AND THERE YOU ARE!  Still, I know that many of you are wary of trusting Monkeedom with Hollywood- and I am, too. I am being more careful than you can imagine.

Let me just tell you this- Sister and I had three meetings with BIG SHOTS. Each meeting lasted about an hour and a half. Mostly, we forgot to talk about business. During all three, we talked about life and grief and joy and parenting and marriage and recovery and  how brutiful it all is. It was exactly, EXACTLY, like taking to you. We got so swept away by connecting that every meeting ran waaaaay over the scheduled time and at some point someone would look at her watch and say “OH CRAP,” and then she’d look at my agent and say, “can we talk soon?” And there would be huge hugs and once, tears, and always “thank yous!” and “NO, THANK YOUS,” and Sister and I and our agent, Jill, would sit in silent awe for a spell after each meeting. People are just PEOPLE. And there is a whole lotta good in those Hollywood hearts. There’s greed and cynicism in places, too – they told me as much. But we, as a group of Monkees, will not prejudge. We will take Hollywood just like we take the rest of the world, one person at a time.

 

 

So that’s it. I know nothing, except that I met some fascinating and loving people and I had a blast with my Sister and Bobby and Mama and if nothing else comes of it than that was more than enough. Also, we stayed on GLENNON STREET. Sort of. Obviously, all of it was pre-destined. We were just along for the ride. As always.

 

 

 

Kay, next. We moved. We live in Naples, Florida now. We decided to go for it. We sold our house in Virginia and downsized our home and our mortgage and we live in a condo on a lake. We are three miles from the most gorgeous sand and water you can imagine sticking your little toesies into. I feel better. A LOT better. My Lyme arthritis is clearing up. I’m re-energized. There is something about all the trapping and responsibilities that accumulate around a life that make it irresistible for me to say BURN BABY, BURN every few years. So we leave everything. Because we are addicted to change, but also because when you step away from all the extra stuff you’re left with the really important stuff. Your partner and your kids and yourself. It’s been good. It wasn’t super easy for the kids. It never is. But I do not believe in sacrificing all my dreams for my kids. If every generation does that, than who ever actually gets to follow her dreams? Nobody, except for the one who decodes the system and decides that to stay childless is the only way to stay true to herself. No, Craig and I follow our dreams and then we provide everything our kids need to adjust, and they do. I hope from this they learn that parenthood does not mean martyrdom, necessarily. And if they don’t learn anything, well….who cares? PALM TREES!!!!

Our backyard!


 

Our Pool!

 

You guys, I’ve gotta stop. This is getting too long. So tomorrow we’ll talk about the inside stuff. We’ll talk about the dozens of emails I’ve received from women who feel like Adams in their own neighborhoods. We’ll talk about how I finally found the courage to watch The Help last night and how all of my recent experiences have made me desperate to write something that will encourage us ALL to do what we ask our children to do – to include those on the sidelines.

There are so many women who feel sidelined. Whether they were put there by a grown up bully or their own fear of rejection or some set of absurd circumstances and grudges that need to be forgotten, already. Oh my goodness, it’s the same. It’s the SAME middle school cycle. We are afraid to put in jeopardy our own place in the social circles by stepping outside to invite someone else in.

One million Adam letters will make NO DIFFERENCE to our children if we are not practicing what we preach. They will do what we do, not what we tell them to do. This BLOWS. But it’s true.

I received an email last week from a neighbor in my old ‘hood, the one I just left. She just found our blog. She loves it, and she loves us. The thing is that I lived in that neighborhood for two years, and she lived directly across the street from me, and I never knocked on her door. She was an Indian woman, with a big, huge family and there was a bit of a language barrier and I couldn’t fit their family nicely into my brain, so I didn’t try too hard. There were neighborhood parties and her family was never there. And I felt the urge to GO to her and say HERE I AM and THERE YOU ARE and let the chips fall wherever the hell they were supposed to fall, but I didn’t. I was trying to find my own place in the social circle of my neighborhood and I didn’t have the time or energy (or desire, if I’m being honest) to figure this lady out. So I just smiled and waved and hurried from the van to the door . . . bare minimum, you know. I’m smiling and waving, so obviously I’m not a jerk.

And then she emailed me last week. She’s a mother-freaking Monkee at heart. Damnit. What a missed opportunity for me. For her. For the whole neighborhood.

I think we need to talk about these things. So many people are lonely.

I watched The Help last night through lots of tears and laughter and confusion and Craig and I asked ourselves- which one are we? We all want to think we’re Skeeter, right? But are we? I think we’re all of them. I think we’ve got terrified bully parts like Hilly and terrified bystander parts like Elizabeth and deep, deep wells of strength and love like Abilene and terrified, trailblazing, bad-ass parts like Skeeter. Good news is, we’re all terrified. So we might as well play the role of the terrified, trailblazing, bad ass, right?  We each get to decide which part of us we’re gonna invite front and center each morning.

We are all of them. We get to choose, though, who we’re going to introduce to people.

Please, God, let me introduce Minnie and Abilene and Skeeter and Constantine and Celia to the world.

I love you.

You is smart. You is kind. You is important.

Love, G

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 



Carry On, Warrior
Author of the New York Times Bestselling Memoir CARRY ON, WARRIOR
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  131 Responses to “Outside/Inside”

  1. Did Beyonce and Baby Beyonce make it to Florida?

  2. I love reading this, it makes me laugh, and I SO relate! I just wanted to say that I agree with your logic about living your dreams. I have the same philosophy; it’s often counter-cultural, but I think it’s correct, and I think it’s teaching your kids something very good. I also agree with you completely that they copy what we do and how we live, not so much what we say. Thank you for being real and funny and open and deep and true!
    I also recently moved to a new town and yes, it’s lonely, so I have to be the one to reach out, and even then, people might reject the offer, but at least I know that I treated them the way I wish I’d been treated, and that I wasn’t so caught up in myself that I didn’t look outside to someone else…but it’s got to be a deliberate choice, and it’s painful and scary, but so necessary. God bless you and your family!

  3. Well, I’m sad I won’t run in to you at Wegmans anymore, but I’m glad you’ve done what’s good for your family. I love what you said about dreams – it’s so true that we can’t wait until _____ to chase dreams. I think our kids need to see us chase our own dreams just as much as they need us to help them find their own.
    love you and will miss seeing your face around town.

  4. I just wanted to ‘welcome’ you to my home state! You’ll know you’ve become a true “Floridian” when you think 60 degrees outside is freezing.

    Florida is lucky to have you. We need more good peeps like you. Heck, Naples is lucky to have you. Most of all, though, us Monkees are lucky to have you.

    Next time I’m in Naples or driving through it, I’ll think to myself, “Glennon is breathing this air right now,” and realize how lucky I am to be sharing this world with you in it :)

    Love wins.

  5. So much about this is wonderful, but I came back to comment that I love the “we don’t sacrifice everything for our children” part. I’m SO GLAD I’m not the only one who thinks that! But, DAMN, it sure seems like that’s how everybody judges their own parenting level! I had a friend say to me, after telling me that between her two kids that EVERY EVENING after her full-time job is spent at a practice, at a lesson, at a kid-thing, that “Well, of course a parent knows it’s all about giving everything up for the kids!”

    And I thought ” …. really? Did your parents do that? I’ll bet not!” But I didn’t say anything because if I did I’d seem … not kid-centered. BUT I AM NOT KID-CENTERED! My husband — now my EX husband — and I always agreed on that: THE WORLD DOES NOT REVOLVE AROUND THE KIDS! But until this moment I thought we were the weirdos.

    Also, PS, my 24 year old and 21 year old sons are wonderful, unselfish, kindhearted and seem none the worse for the fact that they weren’t the center of their parents’ universe when they were growing up.

    Thank you!

  6. Tiny Little G,
    You have made a big mark on the World, and clearly will continue to do so. I wonder how many people that were brought here by the Adam letter are parents of “Adams”? I am.. I have my own Bitty G- Greyson…
    And like your babies- he is the moon and the stars and peanut butter rolled into one. He has Super Powers- also known as Autism. He will be called the “quiet one” the “Kwirky One” and possibly even worse. But thanks to Moms like you- and me…the World that is chock full of all kinds of different- is loving and embracing and more aware. Just 2 eyes at a time. I pray you shine your Monkee love on me and if the opportunity ever makes sense to you- help me share my blog that is trying to make the world a better place for my son, Greyson. Thanks for the touch…Love, Chrissy

  7. Love this so hard I’m gonna break in half!!

  8. Love this so hard I’m gonna break in half!

  9. zounds. loved the update! i wanted to tell you two things.
    1) i had printed your Adam letter months ago and filed it away for back-to-school time. so i LOVE that your re-posted it and that it has brought so many folks to this site.
    2) this post really hit home for me because we have recently moved and I am feeling lonely. And I keep wondering how to connect with my new neighbors. You remind me to meet people, with my heart wide open, right where they are. Literally. Like on the sidewalk. I’m looking forward to hearing your further reflections on loneliness and what we can do to combat it!!

  10. So happy your are feeling better!! So happy you watched The Help, what a wonderful, sad, maddening and down right funny ( c’mon, the pie!!!) story. Moved me beyond words :) Enjoy your palm trees :)

  11. I am so happy to hear you are feeling better. Your body deserves a little peace. Take care of your sweet self.

  12. Mark Burnett+Glennon+Roma Downey = Touched by an Angel: the Reality Series???

  13. ok love everything but what i really need to know is this…WHERE DID YOU GET THAT CARDIGAN? MUST HAVE IT!!!!!!!!!!!!

  14. LORD how I love you! I wish you would have moved to New Orleans so we could be BFF’s!!

  15. Glennon,
    I have been reading your blog for a few months now, and each time it inspires me, makes me laugh, makes me teary, and makes me appreciate my many blessings and hug my baby girl so so tight. I want so much of everything you talk about. The kindness, and fairness, and treating other people with respect and just plain believing that we are good enough just as we are. Your connection to God and the way you talk about it are bringing me back to a spiritual focus on living that has had a tendency to recede into the background too much. Yes, I have to go to work, and do laundry, and pay the bills, and fix my broken down house, but that doesn’t mean I can’t come to those tasks with love and strength and gratitude. Hard things CAN be done! :)

    So, thank you. Those words aren’t enough, but I think from my Monkee heart to yours that perhaps you’ll understand.

    Many hugs
    Maura

    • What a beautiful message Maura, well said. I have been inspired here in all the same ways. This one tiny G really is making the world a better place. She brings into focus the most important things we all know, but sometimes let fade.

  16. Welcome to Naples! I see you met Kelle, you two will make an awesome team. You are going to love it here

  17. Now you live near Kelle Hampton! Glad you had fun with your family in HW… LOVE the cardigan :)

  18. Best of luck and lots of love in your new home! My Gram lives in Marco Island, so I am very familiar with the area and its beauty. She found it to be a very healing place, and I know you will too!

    Jamia

  19. Oh Glennon…. wow Hollywood. What if this takes off..what if we all start connecting…what if we all start treating each other like we would want to be treated…what if we all start looking out for each other….what if we all matter to each other…..what if we all stop and become aware…what if we all no longer act in fear but in love. what if this becomes bigger than you could have ever imagined. Ahhhh i can feel it already!!!!

  20. Naples! Hooray! Southwest Florida with it’s beautiful beaches warm hug of sun sounds like the perfect fit. Totally love how you made it all happen so quickly and that you are feeling so much better. Miracles are all around us. xoxo

  21. Chills as usual after reading your post! You always say it so perfectly. Thank you!

  22. I am so thankful I found this blog site. What a blessing. Love your mission. Can’t wait to keep reading and soak it all in. :)

  23. If i remember the movie correctly, Aibileen always said “You is kind” before “You is smart.” I think the order was purposeful. ;)

    Btw, G, you feed my soul. Thank you.

  24. Every time I read things that you & Kelle Hampton write about each other, I feel like my two friends know each other (even though I don’t actually know either of you!) I’m a college student who dreams of being a momma one hopefully-not-too-far-away day; I am blessed to learn and prepare my heart for the things to come from both you & Kelle, and I already cry when I think about my children starting school! Thanks :)

  25. Thanks for the reminder~insight on following your dreams.
    Have a good night,
    N

  26. I love that affirmation. I’ve watched that movie a bunch of times, and every time I have there have been tears and goosebumps and overwhelming emotions when I hear those words. “You is smart. You is kind. You is important.” So moving.

  27. i love it here. and every single time it has a big growth spurt due to the latest recognition of your complete genius, i feel so blessed to have found you when i did. xoxo

  28. Looooved that book and that phrase! Good luck on the move….those pics look like paradise :)

  29. Well, you could never be accused of procrastination!!! Congratulations on the move, really happy to hear you are feeling better! WOW……I have to say it again, WOW! You have had alot going on!!! Blessing upon blessing upon blessing to each of the Melton clan!!

  30. Today Amy asked me if you moved to Florida. Wait, what? Hmmm…. guess so! Glennon, your actions are helping us all to rethink about living what we value. Good on ya! Miss knowing you are in VA, but happy for your family.

    • Char…you nailed it. I have spent the last 6 hours rethinking my choices and in awe of your bravery, G-funk. Love you and will miss the idea that I might run into you somewhere in Loudoun! xoxo

  31. What an exciting trip!!!! That being said…I know you’re being cautious but please please please be extra extra cautious. We used to live in the heart of LA. It’s great to be loving and trusting and giving but be those things and extra careful about what you hold most dear as well.

    The Help. Amazing. I’m getting choked up just thinking about Baby Girl crying for her Abi

  32. Between the exciting events and the brutiful comments, I don’t even know where to begin. I’m so happy for your hollywood adventure and the move to Florida. What a great example for your kiddos – follow your dreams! I have often questioned some of the things I take on and feel that I might be doing my daughters a disservice by not just being “steady”, but I wouldn’t be true to myself and in the long run what does that teach them? I’m excited for your entire family – and for your health!
    And for those Monkees who connected with Adam, I send prayers of love and comfort. I wish I could meet each of you!

  33. G:
    I can be almost drowning, uninspired and frustrated at various things I read and I click on here…and perspective calms. Thanks for that. I often feel like Celia in my hometown. People are willing to engage to a point but then I am left out of everything because they do not know how to deal with someone with a chronic disease and A.S. I am envious that you could move…I actually can not. Not with the way my brain works…I get anxious if a building changes in my home town. I cried for a week anytime I picked up my mail when I had to move mail to another building. So the physical body that needs to change can not with my mental process and need for support. Sigh. But I am so happy for the changes you made in your life. I think it will be really good. And yes, hollywood people are just people…inspiring and good, frustrating and selfish…it’s all there…and they deserve normal treatment just like the cab driver. Thanks for living that!:)

  34. Lovely post G.

    Hope your new Florida home is just perfect for you all & provides a comfy nest from which you can explore this funny old world.

    Cheers
    Selby

  35. Welcome to Florida! I’m 2 hrs north
    . Don’t worry, hurricanes stink, but they’re *usually* just a mild inconvenience.

    I read the Adam letter last year, and was grateful for it again this year. I’ve got a beautiful Aspie starting 3rd grade this year, and I’m told the social separation will increase this year. One of the Facebook readers said how her son Noah stood up for an Aspie in his class. That comment made this non-crier cry, so grateful to know that unidentified angels like Noah ARE in the school system. <3

    Thank you for connecting people. If you're ever up in Tampa and need someone to connect, we're here. :)

    • My two children and myself are Aspies. I actually home school them but I was so happy to hear that story. Most children were good to my kids in Kindergarten and the year they were both in the system…but there still was a lack of actual friendships and understanding in most cases of sensory overload. It can be lonely sometimes, but so enriching. My hubby often says he loves our family of aspies:) I also have another blog about Aspergers in gals and general info…here is the link:
      http://www.aspieaudrey.com/
      When I was in school, my one good friend saved me. I became quite popular through her and mimicked many social skills. I did not know I had Aspergers until a couple years ago but knew there was something different about me. If the children have one friend willing to stick with them- school is much more bearable. I hope and send wishes of a good friend for your child:) They also have so much to give ( like loyalty, honesty, and refreshing outside the box thinking:)

  36. Just found your blog but as I look at the family photo below, i think I have been here before and now I am back again. Here to stay now:) I asked myself the same question when reading The Help, “who would I have been like?”. I wasnt sure of the answer and I didnt like that! When I asked a book club I was in at the time the question they all kind of looked at me with blank stares. I guess it was too deep for them, too:) Anyways, good luck as you settle into your new home and navigate Hollywood:)

  37. G-

    You touched my heart today in a way I just don’t know how to share. I linked to your blog 3 TIMES today from mine. You are just reaching out as if just to me and to my life.

    http://52weeks52resolutions1mom.blogspot.com/2012/08/you-is-smart-you-is-kind-you-is.html

    You are helping me become a better mother, a better friend, a better person. thank you. THANK YOU!

  38. Hi….I’ve got to tell you that I read my daughter your Adam letter. I just retired from teaching (at age 52), she is a 4th grade teacher, and my husband was sitting nearby, listening as I read. It didn’t take me long to cry, but I plugged along, reading through a tight throat and blurry eyes. I felt silly, so I didn’t look up, until I did, and there was my daughter with tear-filled eyes, and then I heard my husband give the soft chuckle that is his reaction to being choked up and I knew this story had hit home with all of us. That is the beauty of you, Glennon…..you find ways to reach everyone, to remind us of who we are, or who we’ve been, or who we’d like to be. Thank you so much for being so good at putting it all into words. Good luck with the very important people in Hollywoood……I’m sure your story is very important to them. And congratulations on the move. I’m so happy you’re feeling better. I suffer from fibromyalgia, and I know how exhausting chronic pain and feeling fluish can be. I know your beautiful children will make friends and fit in quickly, especially with the story of Adam in their hearts. As always, well done!!

  39. I don’t know how you do it, but your incredible heart and writing talent grab me by the soul and shake me inside/out. We can all do better at the connections thing.

    Congrats on your move. We will miss you here in Virginia but Naples is a wonderful place. My husband and I love to vacation there. Maybe you and Kelle Hampton can get together for lunch!

  40. First, Glennon, thank you as always for your open and honest sharing! So glad to know the move has been beneficial already.

    Second, as an adult who moved every 4-5 years as I was growing up, I can assure all of you thinking about moving with your kids that they will survive, and thrive, if you give them the support they need. My parents told us early about the moves, let us vent any frustrations/fears we had, continued to show us how much they loved us and provided us with as much stability as possible.

    Making new friends as a child or an adult is not easy. As one poster pointed out, joining a club or regular activity is one of the best ways to find potential friends. If you have an interest in the same topic or activity, you already have at least one thing to talk about. Then, don’t give up if the first 1, 2 or 3 people don’t turn out to be your next friend. Persevere! Some people have buddied up and don’t realize how much richer their lives would be by opening up to new friends – their loss. Take the chance to invite someone to meet before or after the activity for coffee or a snack or whatever. Or propose attending another event together, with or without kids and/or spouses.

    Don’t give up…those of us who would love to be your friend are out there!

  41. on a heavier note. thanks for reminding us to break open our circles. i think many of the brutal moments we experience as a society are just a symptom of the big loneliness problem, our unwillingness to venture outside the circles and have more heart-expanding moments.

    i think there is a direct correlation between the violence and hurt we inflict on one another and this loneliness/emptiness thing.

    whenever i keep reading about the mass shootings or shootings on the first day of school or rapes, or any brutal, horrific news, i immediately think of the pain of the victims. but lately, i’ve been thinking about the pain of the assailants. what horrible place do you have to be in to unleash that kind of hurt to yourself and others. and how did we the big WE world, human family have a part in it. what can i do and how i should i be treating everyone around me. one person at a time.

    • This loneliness thing is so pervasive. I think now more than ever. I love what you say about considering the pain of the assailants. I’ve been doing that too. Their actions still make me stinking mad, but I also hurt when I consider the possible pain that they are feeling too.

      Such sadness in the world. It’s exhausting to think about taking it all on. Which is why I love that we are doing it together…one person at a time.

      • Exactly, Holly. Their actions evoke anger, fear and disgust. Then that seems to give way to helplessness, hopelessness and distrust… and then that numbing apathy that just wants to tune it all out.

        Except we really can’t and shouldn’t because we do belong to each other and we’re in this together. Glad we have this forum to make that commitment to each other and our world. Doing hard things, taking a step at a time, reaching one person at a time.

  42. i hope the move has been great for your insides and outsides! thanks for the update on all the great things here and now and those yet to come…

    i heart palm trees :)

  43. Wow. I swear, my husband and I take longer to choose a paint color than you did to up and relocate. That’s awesome!

  44. Glennon, I love everything about Momastery and being a Monkee. I found your site a few months ago just after it went “viral” and I’ve been reading your posts since then. I love your way of writing and your view of the world. Thank you for sharing your journey the way you do and for being an inspiration. I loved what you wrote in one of your blog posts I read today about you listening to the lady talk about having it all, and not agreeing with her. I developed a long term illness nine years ago and have really struggled with a deep sense of failure due to having to leave my teaching career behind and all the dreams I had for how I thought thigns were going to be. It has been hard to have compassion for myself and gratitude for the abundance of my life when many of the messages I have been hearing have been about “having it all”. I have put incredible pressure on myself to heal my body. God was clearly doing His work as experiencing living with a long term illness has been the most humbling and (ironically enough) emotionally healing experience of my life. I am still confused about how to make my contribution to the world as I’m not able to teach, but reading your blog, having deep compassion for myself and other people, and learning to live gently and appreciate how brutiful it all is, is a very heart-expanding experience. Thank you. Em ♥

  45. You couldn’t have picked a better city! Mainly because it’s mine too :) Hope Isaac isn’t scaring you away and that the sunshine is helping you feel better! Let me know if you have any questions about Naples or churches. We love our church, North Naples Baptist, very friendly and family oriented. My husband is a realtor (isn’t everyone these days?!?!) and an appraiser to if you’re looking to buy!

  46. You are living the dream!!! Congratulations on everything!!! I still have a Charleston plate that I can’t let go of, with the palm tree and moon. Your new home looks like a beautiful vacation! I agree, being inclusive is better than exclusive. Sometimes it’s harder, but often times it’s much more rewarding. I’m especially hoping everyone’s little one’s are feeling included with their new classroom adventures, today . I’ll find out, soon (set my oven timer, so I don’t forget to run out to the bus stop!!!). Truly miss ya…xo Lilly

  47. Ive been thinking , about this post , about Adam , about the indian family … about so many people … maybe I need to open my eyes .. maybe the people that I belive that dont need me .. are the people that reeealy need me.. those that dont call my atention are the people that should .call my atention…oportunity is everywhere…

  48. I can’t believe you now live in the same city as the other blogger I read daily: Kelle Hampton. If you are not familiar with her blog I encourage you to read it at kellehampton.com. She’s an inspirational mom of a Down syndrome little girl. Your blogs are different but I love them both! Welcome to Florida!
    (I’m a few hours north of you.)

    • I came to the comments just to make sure someone connected G to kelle hampton’s blog. I think of the blog world as such a huge “place” but continue to see how small it actually is between kindred spirits.

    • Sister!
      I have a coffee date with Kelle tomorrow morning!
      I’m a little nervous.
      :)
      G

      • I visit my parents at their Naples, FL condo for 2 weeks every Spring for some fun and sun. I would FUH-REEK if I saw you and Kelle sipping coffee as I walked down 5th Avenue! My two favorite mommy bloggers in the whole world! I would have to exhibit some serious restraint to not crash your get-together and hug/kiss you both. xo

        Have a great time tomorrow! I can’t imagine Kelle is anything different from how she comes across in her blog–genuine, caring, a great friend.

  49. G – As always, you speak to my heart. I have noticed lately, I feel more and more like Adam. I have noticed it is easy to ignore people who are overweight. I find I become more and more invisible the more space I take up. I remember hearing/reading somewhere that discriminating against the obese is the last social acceptable -ism allowed. Sadly, I find I too, even being a member, look down at anyone overweight. I find that even in small groups, I’m not approached or talked to first. I start conversations and my personality wins them for a bit but they are polite and go back to excluding me in a conversation. Two days ago, two other members of our small PTA had an entire conversation standing right next to me with not one word said to me. Yes, this might be easy to remedy by losing weight. But clearly that is easier said than done. I have always thought of myself as a help-giving Monkee but I am praying hard that your lesson on Adam will be heard by the ladies around me so that I will be a help-receiving Monkee. Love YOU, M.

    • Marley, go ahead. lose weight. its that easy. I mean you arent giving up drugs, or alcohol, not gambling or cigarettes. Its just FOOD. Problem is, food can be an addiction also. And unlike those other addictions you cant quit cold turkey. Nope you have to keep eating for the rest of your life. I know your story. I live it every day. I am lesser because I am obese. A few years ago after the birth of my son a member of our synagogue wrote me an anonymous letter telling me what a horrible mother I am for being so large, that my son was suffering because I couldnt possibly be a good mom or wife. It went on and on and those were the best parts. The worst part is that this person knew me. Knew my struggles of trying to get pregnant. Knew my son was a miracle. Knew me as a friend.
      I wish I could tell you that soon fat will be more accepted. I can tell you, you arent alone. Please keep trying and helping. Coming here helps. I wish you love.

      • HUGS LADIES! HUGS!

      • Amanda and Momma Holmes..THANK YOU THANK YOU.
        Amanda, when you said about being “lesser” hit me right in my heart. That is exactly it. Thank you again for telling me I’m not alone. (I’m still surprised how cruel that letter was from “anonymous” but I also think that knew they were being a terrible person in their heart or why wouldn’t they sign it? They didn’t want to be responsible. It must be awesome to be as perfect as that letter writer is.)

        I love this place and will always come back because of people like you :)

    • Marley, I am right there with you! I am sorry you are going through this. :( I’m supposed to be losing weight but it’s not going well. I wish I could be more encouraging but I wanted to let you know that you are not alone and you are not invisible.

      • First, I want to acknowledge your feelings and honor that they are real; but I have to point out that I am very thin and I often feel the SAME way that you described too! Clearly people do not treat me that way because of my weight, and i often wonder; do they really treat me like that at all or is it my PERCEIVED sense of how i am being treated?

        • Nicole, Hmmm….interesting idea and a good question. I think you are asking, “Is my weight that makes me people isolate me or does my insecurity about my weight make me isolate myself?” Hmmm…I would say this, “When I was thinner I noticed people would talk to me first, or approach me to talk in a group. This rarely happens now, even when surrounded by my peers.” I definitely think there is something to what you are mentioning and i appreciate the kind way you asked. I will think about this more and see what happens. :)

      • Lynn, Thank you for telling me I’m not alone. How funny that we are together in our alone-ness. Your comment means a lot.

  50. Last year, on the first day of school for my littlest littles (they were 8 then) the teacher had each child make a big banner that had their name, and then said “You are kind, Your are smart, You are important” and they hung in the room all year and the teacher would encourage other children to write on the banners when that child had done something nice for them. At the end of the year, the banners came home and are hanging in their rooms, to remind them, not just that they are kind and smart and important, but that somebody noticed and appreciated it. Best teacher idea ever!

  51. You are awesome! Again, thank you for being you and practicing what you preach and inviting us on the journey and especially for spreading the love! I’ve wondered (before I found the Monkees) how the world could develop this sort of love and understanding and fellowship across the world, but now I know. It takes me. And you. And other mes and yous. And more again. That’s it.

  52. From the movie WE BOUGHT A ZOO –

    ” You know, sometimes all you need is twenty seconds of insane courage. Just literally twenty seconds of just embarrassing bravery, and I promise you something great will come of it.”

  53. Oh my gosh. This morning – JUST THIS MORNING – I was worrying about my little monkey who just started kindergarten. And has a hard time fitting in some times. And ALL I want for him is to stop feeling “stupid” and “lonely” and “different”. (he has friends, he just has a hard time in social situations sometimes and is sensitive) And the “You is smart. You is kind. You is important.” scene – the last one where she is crying – popped into my head. And I thought “hello! All you can do is give him the tools. Tell him he is wonderful and then let him figure the rest out. TELL HIM. Even more than you already do!” And then I was able to turn off my brains and go to sleep. Thank you for this post.

  54. Welcome to Florida G!

  55. What?? Well good for you all and I am glad to hear you are doing better!! That is what matters. I can’t wait to hear more Gollywood stuff (Glennon + hollywood) because golly, this is incredible. Wow.

  56. This moving thing was just what I needed to hear today. I have always had dreams of moving and seeing different parts of the country. My husband has an opportunity to move to Richmond for work. We have been really excited but a little concerned about moving the kids. So thank you for somehow knowing this needed to be written today. Although I am sure God had his hand in there. I really agree with you about leading by example, with your kids. We have to be kind to people and we need to pay attention when those opportunities present themselves. The other day I wrote a post about helping young moms out when you see they could really use a hand, but I may go back and revise that to include anyone who needs a hand! So glad you are loving Florida!

    • ME TOO!! I so needed this blog and very much Leslie’s reply. The big scary world became a little bit smaller and the possibility of making a move became a lot easier. My spouse also has a deal that he is currently negotiating…right at this very moment. My concern has been for my kids. This is a great reminder that the kids will be fine.. change is good…God is present….people will help..Monkees will stick together!! Thank you for this much needed “sign” that I need to relax and chase some dreams…with the kids…BIG HUG!!

  57. Love, love, love! Thank you! Thank you! <3

  58. Wow, you exhaust me just reading that! You went to Hollywood and moved to Florida? By the way, I love Naples. My Dad lived there for several years and I enjoyed visiting there. He might be moving back soon. So glad your Lyme pain is improving, hope it continues. Stuck in bed with Lyme flare, myself, so cant wait to hear the rest of the story!

  59. Congratulations on the move, Glennon!

  60. Glennon, youre a looking very very happy … !! Youre golden !! Literally!
    XX

  61. Congrats on the move! The veiw is breathtaking! Thank you for being you and writing like you do! You help me so much! THANK YOU!!

  62. Thank you so much for all your are and all you share and all you write. Beautiful stuff that touches so many hearts and souls.

    Thanks especially for your comment re: living your dreams and then helping the kids adjust. My husband and I struggle with our dreams of travelling and living abroad b/c we are so blessed to live in an amazing city and neighborhood in which we are wonderfully connected to so many beautiful people and don’t want to take that away from our children…

    This post so perfectly put my mind at ease and give me renewed vigor for pursuing our travel dreams. How will our children learn to live their dreams, if they don’t see their parents striving to live their own, right?!:-)

    Thank you. Your words and my access to them will go in my gratitude journal tonight!

  63. “There is something about all the trapping and responsibilities that accumulate around a life that make it irresistible for me to say BURN BABY, BURN every few years.”

    YES!!!!

  64. So excited for all that is going on in Monkee-dom, but really? Mostly so glad that you are feeling even a little better! xoxo

  65. <3 you, G :)

  66. GOOD.FOR.YOU. –
    I am so happy for all you Meltons!!
    Enjoy the sun, soak up the rays and keep on Lovin’…because Meltons – that is what you do best!!! Love you all!!

  67. Congrats on the move!!

  68. Awe man! 2 hours south. You were supposed to come HERE! The community you speak of? I’ve moved 5 times as an adult, 3 times with kids. This is the first place people went out of their way to welcome us, help us, support us. It is relaxed. There is a desire to live well, without pressure or competition. There is community and hearts that want to connect. There is beauty. There are great churches. Hoping and praying for all the best for you in your new location.

  69. OMG, sometimes you just say exactly the right thing, exactly what I need to hear. My husband and I are going to moving across country next summer to be closer to his family. We just adopted 2 brothers and we want to give them a close family group to grow up with, plus I have been wanting a change for so long now. I’ve been living in the same town since 1978 and at the same job for the last 23 years. I’ve never stepped up and followed any dream or goal of my own and I just feel now is my time. My daughter will be 18 and is dragging her feet about figuring out her future and although we are giving her alternatives( come with us, live at the beach and go to school, or move in with her dad) she is wanting to stay in town for a boy and she makes me feel like I am leaving her. I’m feeling so guilty for moving away and following my dream. Your post just hit home with me today, thank you!!!!!

  70. I love your postings, they always make me stop for a moment and look at my life, “who am I and what kind of change am I going to make today…”
    I read the book “The Help” last year for our book club and I loved it. Your comment of “which character am I?” is one of the questions we asked our group and your right, everyone is each and every character at one point in their life, but we can change! It takes a lot of effort and courage to do so, and I think that is what stops people from doing it, is the courage part. The courage to stand up to the world and say, “No, this is who I am and this is what I believe!”
    Way to go G! Way to go and stand up and help US have the courage to make that difference ~ even if it is only for a minute :-)

  71. Amen to following your dreams and making it work for the children!

  72. I will change the world with you…one person at a time. I am in love with everything, EVERYTHING that you are…thank you.

  73. Congrats on making the move! Amazing that you could do it do fast! As always, thank you for being YOU and for sharing your amazing journey with us. Our pastor gave a sermon on kairos yesterday. I thought of you the whole time. I will try to post the podcast on your FB page. Hugs!

  74. The Help is my favorite movie of all time….and your blog, well it is too! Glad your’e all moved and happy. That brings a smile to my face. Heck, YOU bring a smile to my face. Wishing you peace and love and everything BRUTIFUL today and always.

  75. Oh my goodness, Glennon….

    I have lived in this town more than 2 years and I still haven’t made any friends. I go to church and smile and make small-talk with the other moms, ditto at my daughter’s school… I take cookies over to the neighbors at Christmastime. And everyone is nice. Everyone is friendly. But sometimes I am so lonely and I can’t help wondering, why don’t I have any actual friends here? What is wrong with me? Am I keeping people at arm’s length, or is everyone else keeping me out? I really don’t know. And most of the time I manage to convince myself that it’s alright, I have my husband and my girls and I’m happy. But the truth is that I’d kill for a real, live girlfriend to gossip over coffee with. I have friends from high school or college, but we just chat on FB or the phone, and it’s not the same. When it comes to making new friends, I always feel that I joined the party an hour late and everyone has already partnered up.

    • Jacki, I am just like you.

    • Jacki,

      I was EXACTLY like you. I always figured there was something wrong with me and my ability to connect with other women. We moved to a new community that was small and tight and Norman Rockewell-ish….and nothing changed. At first. After two years of standing outside looking in, I finally took the plunge. I went to a Bunco party. Yes – it’s a stupid game, but it’s a chance to meet people and talk to people and let them see who you are and how wonderful you are. It didn’t happen overnight, but I started being braver about stopped to talk to a few people sitting on their porch… and you know what? They asked me to join them! Look into whether your community has Bunco or book club or wine club and GO! It will be hard, very hard, but a lot of times our perceptions that everyone is partnered up is just our fear talking. There is always at least one person in those situations feeling exactly like you are. And if your community doesn’t have Bunco or Book club – start one up! I’m sure there would be many interested.

      Just remember though – the worst thing you can do is stand and watch everybody and just wait for them to exclude you. Because they will. People generally will only open up to people that are also willing to open up.

    • Is there a MOPS group in your area? http://www.mops.org

    • Jacki, I wonder if you live in my community. Not really, but it’s a very standoffish place. I long for friendship. Real friendship. I moved away from home 10 years ago and lived in 4 communities since then and have not found my niche. I am wanting to move again but kind of want to dig in my heels and make it work here.

    • I couldn’t have said it better myself. We’ve been in our neighborhood for 5 years now, and I feel the same way. I go to a Book Club and Pokeeno group once per month. It’s fun, we all chat a little. But it’s not like having a best friend – someone you can call or get coffee with. I like all the girls in my “clubs”, but that’s the only time we ever talk – I don’t see them the rest of the month. It seems everyone is busy with their own lives, or they have their “fill” of besties, so I’m just late to the party. I love my husband and daughter more than I can say…but it’s still lonely. I feel ya, sister.

      • I am going through the SAME thing — thank you for speaking up everyone. It’s actually really comforting to hear of other’s struggles.

  76. Holy WOW! You’re in Naples! Good for you guys! I have to ask – do you miss your church? I have been out of the Momastery loop lately (summer was too busy) but I just remember past posts about you loving your church – they made me want to find a new church – and I’m thinking it must have been tough to leave a great one…

    Looking forward to catching up with your blog this fall! Happy Monday!

  77. I was one of the encouragers of your moving, so I’m glad you decided to take the plunge! If it is a place that will make you feel better physically then that’s just awesome because you have to take care of yourself to take care of your family, and as I like to say “if mama ain’t happy, ain’t nobody happy!” Sometimes a move is exactly what you need to reboot your world. :-)

    And wow about Hollywood. Will be interesting to see what transpires!

  78. Love to you…love to me, too. Thank you thank you from my whole heart for choosing to share your everything. I feel so honored to have your insight added to my experience. Breathing deeply….

  79. So glad you made the move and are feeling better. How is Theo liking his new home? I havent read The Help yet but because of my weight I dont fit in a lot of places. I am quite large and so there are many prejudgements against me before I even say hello. And for some reason people have always seemed to feel that commenting on it is acceptable especially if they think they are being helpful. Ok I want to leave on a lighter note so your cardigan was fabulous and please please let us know what brand your gorgeous blue bag is.

    • Amanda, sending you love and prayers, and hopes for a fulfilled life in whatever avenues you find yourself. No judgement, just a hi there, and a glad you are here and sharing your story. Love to you! :)

  80. GOOD FOR YOU! I CANT BELIEVE YOU MOVED TO FLORIDA! How do you do these things so quickly??? It is inspiring and kind of insane – AND you went to LA to meet with Hollywood folk….you are some.thing.else. Prayers…and glad to hear the lyme pains are calming down – thank you, climate and change! And God, the creator of it all…the one who gives us freedom to choose and live!

  81. Sniffles and loves….Monkeedom & Hollywood…who’da thunk. But, at the end, we stay true to something we all learned in kindergarten or before hopefully…treat others the way you want to be treated. It does not matter who those others are, it does not matter who we are. We are all here, present, right now, at this moment, and we all want a decent life for us and for our kids. So, talk less, listen more, smile, and be grateful. Love you, Glennon! :-)

  82. Loving it all G. And beyond thrilled you moved to water and palm trees and warmth!!!

  83. Congrats on move and Hollywood and all that trickles down – hoorah!

    I often say we as mothers choose to be a martyr – benefiting just about no one in the process.Thank you for showing us how to make the best sacrifice for our children – to follow our dreams w/ confidence – so they may do the same.

    You continue to amaze me – Hollywood?!! Is it really just Nashville w/ a tan? Truth?

    Love all you do – thank you, thank you!!!

  84. Sister on! So happy for your health and well being, and for being brave and going for it!! Looking forward to what you have to say about adult loneliness!

  85. It’s been awhile since I’ve read the Help, but I’m the one that married Hilly’s ex boyfriend and doesn’t fit in anywhere no matter how hard bad I want to and I feel like the more I try to make connections the more alone I am.

    • I want to send you love, Lynn! I hope that you feel more connected soon! Don’t know where you are in this world, but I want you to feel loved and valued! <3

    • Lynn. My brain and heart are dedicated to YOU these days. You just don’t know how many Miss Celia’s there are out there. You are not alone. My inbox is JAM packed. We will fix it, a little bit. I know we can. If not us, who? If not now, when?

      • Is it possible to have a LYME revolution at some point? Dont even know what that means or what Im asking, but….why is this disease so insane and devastating and confusing?

      • Thank you. Really. I am able to “just keep swimming” most of the time but there are days like today that I feel like I’m going to drown.

      • We made the decision today that we are moving in June of 2015. That seems like a long time but my son will graduate in May and I’ve committed to him that we will stay here until he graduates. We are moving somewhere with a beach. Even though it seems like a long time, I have hope today because I only have to survive until then.

    • Lynn!!! Me too!!!! we’ll get through it together, yes? email me :) and G — welcome to my home!! Settle in, but we got to meet :)

      • :) Meeting is good. Together is a word that packs quite a punch, isn’t it? I’m sorry you’re going through this. We certainly can do this, right? The alternative is just not acceptable.

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