Well. That certainly turned out to be the right thing to do- telling you guys about my struggles with Lyme and parasites and indecision.
I don’t know how prayer works. To tell you the REAL truthiest truth, I only believe a teeny part of the time that it works at all. Usually I think, WHILE I AM PRAYING- what the hell good is this going to do??? Which I’m sure God can’t hear. He can only hear my silent voice that is praying, not my OTHER silent voice that is mocking my own prayers. Thank God, he can’t hear that second voice. That would be awkward.
There is this scripture that says if you BELIEVE while you pray, your prayer will be answered. If you don’t, it won’t. Not a fan of that scripture. Still, I pray sometimes, and I know that with God, a teeny tiny iota of belief is enough. Faith as tiny as a mustard seed, He says, can move mountains. Last year I bought a bottle of Mustard Seed (now the ONLY spice in this house besides ketchup, which Craig says definitely doesn’t count because apparently he has joined some sort of Spice Verification Committee.) You should see how small these mustard seeds are. Like grains of sand. I Googled mustard seeds and found out first that mustard seeds are mentioned not only in the New Testament but also in Jewish, Hindu and Buddhist texts. And that when those teeny tiny mustard seeds are planted, they each grow six feet tall and tend to grow towards each other, creating a golden canopy. Comforting and protective, canopies. Maybe faith is eventually a golden canopy? After it has plenty of time to grow?
Also comforting- the letters and emails and comments and silent prayers I’ve received from my monks during the past week. I can’t tell you how much they help me. I read every single last one, from the Hi G! beginnings to the Love, Your Monkee endings. I soak them in, read them to Craig and Sister and each one makes me a little stronger and more hopeful and AMAZED at the way that we human beings, with God, are able to turn suffering into triumph, beauty and HOPE to pass on the next sufferer. Thank you. Thank you from my whole family.
Now. Do you remember Mindy? Not the Mindy to whom we just gave a van, but Mindy of “Mindy Monday?” Mindy who was going into chemo and so we all dedicated a day of acts of kindness to her?
Last week, I received letters from both Mindy and her angel chemo sister, Megan. I am going to share Megan’s letter today and Mindy’s on Wednesday. When Megan or Mindy write the word “you,” they are referring to all of us who come here and believe in love and the power of the written, encouraging word. I hope they bring you as much hope and fire and awe that they brought me. I hope they encourage you to keep showing up for yourself, your family, your friends and fellow Monkees. That’s all we can do, and that’s ENOUGH. Miracles happen every day. They will happen TODAY. THIS is the day. Let us be glad and have eyes to see the tiny miracles all around us.
Dear Glennon -
My name is Megan and I’m 38 today. I’m a married mother of two and I live in Phoenix.
I became a Monkee some months ago, thanks to Mindy (yes, Mindy Green, of your “Mindy Monday” movement some months back.) You see, Mindy and I met having chemo together last December. We share a wonderful oncologist in Phoenix. She was diagnosed with Breast Cancer and I was diagnosed with Hodgkin’s Lymphoma just a few weeks apart, in November. She’s 34 and I was 37. Most of our doctor’s patients were far older than us. Most cancer patients in general are far older than us. He, being the amazing man that he is, knew how alone each of us young(ish) mothers would feel in that chemo infusion room. So he arranged for us to have chemo on the same day and time each week, and asked me on my second visit for chemo to sit in the room with Mindy, who was there for her first treatment. I happily obliged.
Mindy and I chatted every other Wednesday while we had chemo together. We talked about our hair loss (we are both fiesty redheads! She, of the auburn variety and me of the strawberry blond). We talked about our kids–hers, the incomparably adorable Lana, age 2, and my son Jonah, 11, and daughter Dyllan, 9. We talked about work (she’s a pediatrician, I’m a writer and communications exec.) We found one another on Facebook so we could keep in touch between treatments, and she helped me tell all my Facebook friends about my situation, as I’d been hiding it for months. Opening up and letting others love me through this thing was enormously healing. I don’t think I would have done that without Mindy’s encouragement. I used to be so private about health information. Really, I was private about revealing anything that I considered a weakness. Mindy helped me change that.
We exchanged email addresses and phone numbers and over the course of our six-months of chemo, became as close as lifelong best friends. We confided everything in one another. We cried together. We laughed together. We emailed each other late at night, when cancer is the scariest and you believe the treatments may actually kill you, and that no one on this earth understands.
The truth is your husband and parents and kids and friends can do their very, very best to love you through cancer, and ours did. But you still feel terribly alone. Only YOU have it. Only YOU had to endure the horrific treatments. Only YOUR life hangs in the balance. Only YOU worry you won’t get to see your babies grow up, that you may not get to fix your baby girl’s veil on her wedding day or see your son become a father. And only a mother’s heart can hurt that badly over those thoughts.
And when you get this horrible disease at an age when none of your peers has it, you feel even more alone. Isolated. Selected and punished. Forsaken.
So having someone your age to turn to, someone to fight the good fight with, someone who truly, totally gets every side of this bullshit situation, they become a lifeline. And that’s what Mindy and I became for each other. We traded books and we had long talks. After Mindy’s mastectomy in February, our chemo schedules were off. We no longer had it the same day. So we started showing up for one another’s treatment, just to sit and talk and be there for each other.
Mindy introduced me to Momastery about halfway through chemo. She told me all about Mindy Monday, how she poured her heart out to you and how all the Monkees did a random act of kindness that day in her honor. I logged on and read nearly all of your blog posts going back years. I laughed and cried and felt a kinship and a hopefulness that I had not felt in months when I read your words.
Mindy and I talked about you and Momastery during chemo all the time. With our silk scarves tied on our bald heads, total lack of eyebrows and eyelashes and feeling robbed and exposed and sick and so tired, we talked about how the place you’ve created is a preview of heaven. That was Mindy’s gem, that one. I totally agreed.
I mean it from the very bottom of my very full heart when I tell you Momastery helped us heal, Mindy and me. Your mantra, “We Can Do Hard Things,” has sustained us through this mess. Your words, your belief that love wins, your acceptance of life as “brutiful,” well it empowered us beyond belief. You just have no idea.
Mindy and I both gave to the Love Flash Mob for the vans. It felt amazing to do something small and watch the Love Revolution take over. It restored us both in ways that can’t be told in words.
We both got clean PET scans in late May, praise God. That means we had a complete response to chemo. We both needed radiation, her for longer than me, to ensure every last teeny tiny cell gets killed and this monster doesn’t come back for us one day. Radiation is cruel and harsh in entirely different ways than chemo, and we’ve exchange photos of our burned skin and stories of not being able to swallow solid food.
But we’re still standing. We’re still here. We did not lay down and let this thing take us. We have babies to raise. We decided early on that this is NOT how our stories end.
Yesterday, I finished my radiation. So today, my birthday, is a re-birthday. It’s my first day of my post-cancer life. I survived this year, this shocking, maddening, surprising, painful, brutal, blessed year. At some points I just didn’t think this day would ever come. I have you to thank, in part, for seeing me through it, even though you didn’t know you were.
And Mindy, well she and her husband and baby girl moved to Portland a few weeks back. I miss her terribly, but we have phones and Facebook and so we are still tethered. We will always be tethered–by cancer, by healing, by Momastery.
Thank you for what you’ve done for us.
Sincerely,
Megan
Megan,
That letter is fabulous. Thanks for receiving all that you did to make it through, for being thankful for what you were willing to receive and for sharing a tiny bit of it in written form. Then, allowing Glennon to share it with us. Just Beautiful!!
Some of the language in the posts and comments reminded me of this song I once sang in choir, which I love for the melody but adore for the words. Perhaps it will speak to some other Monkees.
Draw us in the Spirit’s tether;
For when humbly, in thy name,
Two or three are met together,
Thou art in the midst of them:
Alleluya! Alleluya!
Touch we now thy garment’s hem.
As the brethren used to gather
In the name of Christ to sup,
Then with thanks to God the Father
Break the bread and bless the cup,
Alleluya! Alleluya!
So knit thou our friendship up.
All our meals and all our living
Make us sacraments of thee,
That be caring, helping, giving,
We may true disciples be.
Alleluya! Alleluya!
We will serve thee faithfully.
Your blog brings me to tears every time I read it. I have never had the courage to tell anyone about my ‘second voice’ while I pray. Not even my therapist. Sometimes, when I pray, my other voice, the bad one, is mocking me and god the whole time. It is terrible. THANK YOU for sharing so much of your heart with us. I am so glad to know I’m not alone in this, and to know that someone as Godly as you struggles with this very same thing.
M&M’s letters are a beautiful testament to the hope and joy you can find around you. These reminders seem to come when I need them and it makes me grateful for the love and support I enjoy in my immediate life and for the knowledge that there are people “out there” that will care/do care about the people around them, whether they’re strangers or soon to be friends.
High fives, big hugs and monkey joy to them for not taking their diagnoses laying down and fighting back.
Brutiful joy, brutiful community!
Praise God for these women, their healing and their example of the gift God offers in human connection.
“If you have faith a of a mustard seed…” verse and a tiny mustard seed hang in my closet. It is the perfect life verse if you need one. My mom said it was her verse when she tried to breast feed me and I was “difficult” — what foreshadowing for my life ahead….
Love to you G and these 2 amazing fighters!! Prayer works& God is good, thx for the remnider
it’s like refreshing liquid gold for my soul
Dear Glennon, THAT was a beautiful story. Well, both the mustard seed and the chemo twins were. I do hope your Lyme’s is getting more under control. I ache for you when I hear your struggles with that dad burn disease!
Love you & your life.
Cookie
PS I don’t know what a URI is, but it sounds like a report on a chermo screen, so don’t want one!!!
WOW aka holy shit……..i luv this and luv all ya:)
Loved the story of these healing sisters and how they supported each other. Glennon – hope you are feeling better. Thank you and your Monkees for being who you are!
And happy Fourth of July!
Glennon, Megan and Mindy
I can relate very well to Megan’s thoughts about being ill, being young, and feeling alone and different. I remember feeling like the FIRST thing people saw when they looked at me, was a SICK person. Oh, how I hated that!
I think that the value in sharing and connecting in the way you have all done, is that it helps us prioritize the components of our identities. FIRST, we are loving, compassionate, strong, supportive human beings. THEN, the “stuff” we are struggling with, falls somewhere lower on the list. Things feel a lot better in that order! Thanks girls!
Glennon~
I am praying for your health! Of course!
And I want to thank you. Last night I came across one of your previous posts about your past addictions and you compared it to being in a whale. Yes, someone who articulated what I feel! My whale is food. And for so many years I have equated my worth to being at the “right” weight. I know it is not true but sometimes it feels true. And now I have a husband who tells me that my value to him, really, does equal my fitness level (weight). So, Glennon, I am not going to allow that whale to consume me anymore. I am not going to let 20 lbs. separate me from three little angels living in my house. I am going to reread that post, eveyday if I have to. And someday, someday soon, I am going to add to the handful, literally, of pictures of me with those little angels because I believe in myself. And I want them to have pictures of them with their mommy because I am proud and strong. Thank you so, so much for the inspiration on this site. It is encouraging me…and that feels good.
God Bless.
much love, Jill!!
Omg that was a beautiful letter. That lady has a gift with words. Thanks so much for sharing, G and Megan and Mindy.
Perspective! Thanks for sharing all of your stories. I so needed a reminder that we can do hard things and that some people (you all) have harder things to do. Sending as much support as I can and the hope that soon you can take a break from your hard things.
Megan, Mindy, G, and all the Monkees,
I posted this comment on the FB page yesterday, and I have to repost it here with a bit of context…My mom was diagnosed with breast cancer 44 years ago, in 1968, when I was 2 years old (and my siblings were 8 and 10). Now on the verge of her 79th birthday, having seen all her kids grown up and all of her grandkids either grown into adulthood or at least more than old enough to remember her well (the youngest being 8), we have reached this point, and I can truly say that I may not have been open to experiencing it this way if not for the little voice that encouraged me to share this story with the monkees and ask for their support and prayers (all new to me). So here’s what I said on FB:
For those of you who have been following and/or sending prayers and words of support: I had the opportunity to spend the night in the hospice room with my mom last night, and I’m so glad that I did. She told me it was the best sleepover she ever had! I was there to hold her hand each time she woke up or was awakened by the nurses to change positions. And we had one-on-one time this morning which I can truly say left me feeling that there has been nothing that needs to be said, left unsaid. When I asked her how she felt about all this, her answer amazed me because it had nothing to do with pain or suffering or fear or sadness. She said it was “uplifting”, all the good things that kept happening.
Talk about blessings…
P.S. The cancer never came back, but alas she did live long enough to battle 20 years of heart disease. She was a warrior monkee without even realizing it. She did everything she could to stick around for a good long while to keep tabs on all of us.
I learned about mustard seed….and how Jesus may have viewed from this very cool book, Understanding Jesus, by Joe Amaral. Mustard is a tenacious plant that is so aggresive, it pushes things (mountains!) out of its way as it grows. If I have faith like a mustard seed…it doesn’t give up – it takes over, & pushes everything else out of the way. It’s not about a tiny seed…it’s about tenacity, persistence, belief, love. And guess what wins?
Thank you Megan for sharing your story. It means so much.
Looking forward to hearing from Mindy.
Love, Lou
Glennon,
There are days when each of us just feel like throwing in the towel, like having our own little pitty party. We yell, we cry, we wallow and then once we get all this trapped energy out we decide to keep carrying on. Reading your essays and the inspiring words of your guests posts helps heal those days when you feel like throwing in the towel and the drama of hosting your own pity party becomes a very distant thought. THANK-YOU from the bottom of my heart for having the creative abilities and desires to do what you do each day…..”you are enough”!
This was such a beautiful letter of friendship and love. Even though it was such a horrible illness like cancer that brought them together to support each other, they made it through it – because they were there for each other. Love and prayers to them both. Such strong ladies who inspire so many with their stories.
Just have to add, my oncologist used to be an underwear model; it was how he paid his way through college. Talk about eye candy! But I know his wife and four beautiful children so it kind of wrecked the whole cuteness thing for me…:)
Never let it be said that bloggers don’t change lives. Ah-maz-ing, and humbling. This makes my ‘hard day’ look like vacation.
I think faith really is like that – and with the tiniest of seeds we really can grow the largest of faith trees as we nourish the trees with God’s word, etc. And we help each other build faith (and love) through our service and prayers for each other – just like we experience all the time here on Momastery. Thanks, Glennon!
Mandie Joy, what a small world! The minute I saw your name, it rang a bell. I “know” you through Christina, at least through her blog and yours. I followed along through the amazing times that you ladies had in Africa, all of the wonderful things that you did for the children of Uganda and through her adoption of her daughter. Christina traveled with our family from CA to help out for a few months in NC and decided to stay and make her life there in NC. So it’s nice to know that we played a small role in helping her find the place that she’d call home.
Sorry, this ended up in the wrong place, it was supposed to be in reply reply to one of the ladies at the bottom, but now I can’t delete it!
Southlakesmom- Your comment totally made me laugh. Megan called Dr. Paul a soap opera doctor because he was so handsome.
I think we told him that just after this picture was taken.
Megan & Mindy, congratulations for making it “to the other side” and to the beginning of the rest of your lives. Hugs, Jenifer
Mindy, Did you go on a King’s Kids mission trip to abbotsford in roughly 1992 or 1993 or so? When i saw your picture i instantly thought it was you – but who knows? How cool would it be that i was praying for the same Mindy that i prayed with so many years ago! Either way, wonderful news that you are both healthy and I’m praying for continued blessings for both of you!
Hi Andrea,
I am sorry, but I was not on that Mindy who was on that mission with you. I have done missions elsewhere though…Africa, Haiti, Indonesia/New Guinea, Mexico. Do any of those ring a bell?
G – I believe the power of prayer comes from the real energy of our loving thoughts and words that we put out into the Universe – into God’s “hands”. The more people who pray for one person or thing, the more loving, healing energy is guided towards that person. I think it’s just a matter of physics – which is all God anyway – same same, right?! I think God leaves some things up to us…or rather endowed us with our own strengths. We have the power to pray love and healing…and it totes works. Your “thinking mind” doubts it, but your heart knows the truth. Thoughts shmoughts. Prayers are your heart’s words. Doubts are your mind’s words. We both know about that ridiculous monkey mind….can’t always be trusted.
Also, amazing story. Thanks for sharing Megan! Can’t wait for Mindy’s story.
Monastery continues to help me heal, so I very much appreciate Mindy’s heartfelt sentiments of gratitude. Samesies. Lylas -Katie
I don’t mean God’s “hands” as in for Him/Her to do something with….I mean into the Universe that God created and therefore all of it and us are essentially the “hands” of God at work ( and play!)
Aaaaaannnnnnddd….crying. Thank you, Glennon, for creating this little preview of heaven.
just want to say that this post has stayed with me all day, much love to the Monkees, Mama monkee, you rock, darlin’.
Oh. Wow. That just made my day.
xoxo
wow, how incredibly touching, uplifting, inspiring, and so much more. Thank you G for continuing on your journey, for writing us, and keep us all connected. Somedays I feel so weak, and stories like this remind me of how strong each one of us are, and how we can easily uplift one another. Thanks for sharing!
Did anyone else notice that their doctor wasn’t just kind and wise but really cute?
That should be a law — all cancer docs must be KIND and WISE and REALLY CUTE…sure would make it suck at least some less to go in each visit.
Oops — now there are Monkees out there hoping Craig is secretly a doctor.
This is such a beautiful letter! Those gorgeous women inspired me today. I will LIVE more fully because I can. And I will cultivate deep and meaningful friendships. It is easy as a mother to neglect that part of ourselves. But I really am learning how critical that is! Thank you.
Oh-em-gee G! I was stunned when I saw your post today and immediately recognized Megan from college (go Broncos!). Let me say that she looks as beautiful today as she did back in the 90s and her letter shows she is even more beautiful inside her fighting body.
Thank you for that .
I had such a difficult weekend .. I was really bad this morning , my heart was hurt .. my feelings were horrible ..and i couldnt breath .. I just wanted to run away and scream .. I couldnt even read this blog ..cause I was so bitter and sad ..
But I decided to read bit by bit this story ,, and then went out to lunch , and pray ..
I m felling better , and happy that I have you all to remember that this is life .. thats why we are here .. to win .. to do hard things.. to love no matter what…
I ll do my best … thank you monkees .
hope you have a better day today, Maria, much <3!
Don’t doubt the power of prayer, glennon. You, my dear, are an answer to several’s prayers.
This post is so great, Glennon. It was because of Momastery that I was able to meet both Meghan and Mindy and reach out to them with a complimentary head wrap from Good Wishes. You are doing amazing things Glennon. Random people with similiar stories are able to connect, share and those who have tools to help are happy to assist. Love wins everyday on this blog and on your FB Page. Thanks for sharing your gifts of writing honestly and openly.
No words to express the gift of monkeehood! My heart is so full and broken at the same time. My innermost thoughts are always put into words by you Glennon and all the comments that follow. The saying is true, “When God shuts a door He always opens a window..”. Momastery is a window for me with a beautiful view! Praying always!
Feeling so thankful for the wisdom of that doctor to bring Megan and Mindy together. He must be a Monkee!
Thank you for sharing Mindys letter.As a melanoma cancer veteran since 2001 I sometimes block out the memories of the first year of treatments,but i need to remember, to remind myself how lucky i am to be alive today.I related with every word she wrote,as you often say life is hard,but brutiful.I hope you keep writing mny many more blog post and that i continue to read them all for the years to come…thanks fro a great site.
Stan
Wow.
I love my friend, Megan.
I prayed, a lot, through chemo “Lord, I believe; help my unbelief.” (Come to think of it, I still pray that a lot.)
God gives us so much grace. He just wants us to be honest and real with him. He really is so good to us.
This is an amazing story and letter because it reminds us of how fragile life is and how friendships and connections (even if they are through electronic means) can keep us strong. As I have been navigating through a very tough time in my life (I lost a daugter, Kate (4), 5 years ago) I have come to the conclusion that we all have something at some point that will potentially break us. I am not a very religious person, but I do believe that the power of prayer kept me and my family going during the worst of our grief. I think it still does. There’s also the feeling of hope that there might just be something out there that is bigger than us and one day we will be able to see it, and maybe I’ll see Kate again. I enjoy reading your blog. I don’t get out here too often, but I appreciate your insight. I especally remember your post about mother-in-laws…and it helped changed my view. Thank you. ~Kristin
hugs, Kristin!
Thank you Kate.
Monkee Stacy sent this to me yesterday:
The world breaks everyone,
And afterward,
Some are strong
At the broken places.
Hemingway
Love to you, Kristin. And may God hold your precious Kate until He can hand her back to you.
Thank you so very much! I see her every day in the faces of my other children…and I am so grateful.
Sometimes I feel so entirely broken, it is all I can do to keep from crumbling. Thank you (and thanks Mr. Hemingway) for this beautiful, beautiful reminder.
PRAISE. THE. LORD.
Two little mustard seeds grew and made a canopy for each other…LOVE this.
That is the perfect metaphor! Beautiful!
G
On the subject of praying, this is the most insightful thing I have ever read:
Reporter speaking to Mother Teresa:
“ Mother, when you pray what do you say to God?”
“I don’t say anything I just listen” replied Mother
Reporter: “Well then what does God say?”
Mother: “He doesn’t say anything, He just listens.”
She continued: “If you don’t understand that I am sorry; but I can’t explain it any better than that.”
I’ll listen for you and those two wonderful monks you shared with us today.
Tim.
That is my favorite story too.
Love,
G
amazing! my cup runneth over
Amazing way to start the day. You both have written bone-deep truths that show that all of us tied together can be EPIC. Love the blog, love the movement, LOVE the MONKEES. Prayers for G, Megan, and Mindy. Monkee love.
Glennon,
This is beautiful and this right here is why I love and am proud to be a part of this amazing group! Love to you all….
Sister On all you amazing warrior women (and men)
Xoxo
Tears, tears, tears. I’ve read the most horrible (as in cruelly challenging) and amazing stories here, and am constantly amazed by our human capacity to triumph over so many difficult things. I can only hope to have a portion of the strength that I read about here. You all are amazing.
Wow. Wow. Wow. Dang it, I wore eye shadow AND mascara today…and you have made me cry. So happy to read Megan and Mindy’s story. Bless you, Glennon, bless you with love and light always.
I just feel like saying “HOLY SHIT”. That is what I kept saying over and over while reading through the tears. Fixing your daughter’s veil on her wedding day? HOLY SHIT. This stuff really happens to women just like me. My heart actually hurts right now. In a good and bad way. God, please God, BLESS these women. God Bless you too, Glennon. And I am not 100% on God and prayer either, but if it works, then I will try. Brutiful is RIGHT. Holy shit.
Love certainly does win! Thank you Mindy, Megan and Glennon for letting us lift you up and be with you on your journeys. All 3 of you are inspiring beyond belief– and yes, ya’ll have babies to raise and lives to live and we are so so so grateful that you are here to warrior on Monkee Sister Mamas. Sending you and your families and doctors so much love and light. <3
Um, not a clue as to why I replied there… but hey Laura
“Holy shit” was my first response as well.
I think my next book might be titled “holy shit.”
it really is the best definition of, well, everything.
Holy shit, I love you guys.
That reminds me of the homily given at my dear uncle’s funeral. He was a Jesuit priest–FULL of LIFE–but died too early of melanoma. The priest who gave the homily said that in his last week he kept asking if it was “time”. Was it time for him to die? They kept saying to him, “No, it’s not time yet.” This went on for several days until, finally, it was time. So the priest told him, “Yes, I think it’s time.” And my sweet Uncle Joe asked him, “So what’s going to happen?” And the priest said to him, “Heaven is going to open and the angels are going to come down and wrap themselves around you and take you straight to the heart of God.” He said that he took that in and thought for a minute and then said…”HOLY SHIT!” There wasn’t a dry eye in the church but we laughed through our tears (as I’m doing now almost 20 years later!).
“holy shit” coming out of a priest’s mouth must have been shocking. Good for that guy. My kinda priest!
Good tears of joy. Your writing instills the beauty of love and reaffirms to me each time I read that the world and the people in it are intrinsically good and lovely. It’s each person’s fear that makes our love waiver. Here’s to kicking fear in the rear and taking each day head on like Megan and Mindy had to do. I feel amazingly inspired today!
Much love coming from the D!
Sister on, Monkees! It even works over long distance!
Beautiful! My heart is so full. Thanks for sharing, Glennon and Megan.
Beyond-words-touching-story from two beautiful and strong ladies. Thank you, Megan and Mindy for sharing your journey with us. May God bless both of you beyond all comprehension. Love and prayers for you two.
What a beautiful letter and how heartfelt. Glennon you are such a blessing and amazing for creating such an incredible support system for the world to be a part of. xoxo
I love the word tethered. This has me thinking what am I tethered to that is both positive and destructive. The ideas of spinning out of control but knowing you are tied to something that won’t let go of you is comforting but the idea of not being able to be free of something and always being pulled back in by something that is destructive is scary. I have them both in my life right now. I love coming here to hear and pray for others but I always walk away with some type of change or insight into myself as well. Love you all!
Amazing. Inspiring. Touching. Remarkable. God put these two women together through the chemo doctor. He always knows what we need even if we don’t. That’s one of the many things I love so much in Him. G- thank you for being so authentic and transparent in your walk and talk with God. It lets others of us out here know that when we pray, we don’t have to be perfect. When we believe, it doesn’t have to be perfect. Of course it doesn’t. If we were perfect, why would we even need God? Thanks for being a great example of being who you are and knowing that it is enough. I needed that today!
This is exactly what this place is all about. I believe He cries with us in our sufferings. I don’t know why he heals some and not others..I only know that I believe his plan is far greater than what we can see. I do believe that we are called to pray and that there is power in prayer. There is also power in a testimony. Thank you for sharing these from beautiful Megan and Mindy…what an encouragement.Thank you G!
Thank you for starting my week with hope and love and faith. I send you blessings and prayers for your new life, post-cancer. Hugs, too. Air hugs, but hugs, nonetheless. Hugging you in the air right this very minute.
Dear G. We’ve never met but I am a devoted Monkee and I really love you. I love how you can nail so many unspeakables right on the head and say them out loud. Thank you for putting yourself out there and sharing with us. I am praying for you and hopefully I have faith at least as big as a mustard seed. I already know that God is working amazing miracles through you!
We MIGHT always have to deal with cancer on this side of heaven, but we WILL always have God to use each and every one of us for His amazing glory. This is the perfect example of how God uses cancer.
With love to you all,
Patty
Oh wow.
This did make me teary and wistful but also mad at myself. I recently quit drinking (yes, I have read all of your recovery posts—thank you thank you thank you!) and I did it for much the same reason expressed in Mandy’s letter:
YOU worry you won’t get to see your babies grow up, that you may not get to fix your baby girl’s veil on her wedding day or see your son become a father. And only a mother’s heart can hurt that badly over those thoughts.
But I still feel sorry for myself and put upon at times, and then I felt awful about evening thinking that once I read this post, because these women have CANCER and I have what seems like such a selfish disease of I WANT MORE.
So I was struggling with all of this sturm and drang and not even knowing what I would say about it when I scrolled down a teeny bit more and saw the title of your previous post: Not Worth Comparing.
Love and love and love to everyone who makes Momastery what it is.
You showed up and started a movement…one I feel so blessed to be some small part of (yes I ended a sentence with a preposition). I am never so proud to be a mom, a woman, a human, than when I read your posts and see what we can all do for each other.
I struggle sometimes when I wonder what my purpose is, or what is my talent ( when I’m doing laundry, shuffling kids, etc) and I know that is stupid ego talking, but when I confided this to my rosary group – talk about a fun group of girls who like to pray! – we realized that our big contributions don’t have to be big, and that it is the small things that are the big things. Our interactions with every single person, and leaving people better than when you met them. I take that to heart (most of the time) and it makes every thing I do feel important.
But you put all those little interactions and personal intentions together in monkeedom………..and SHABAM! You got yourself a movement! I love that.
Thanks:)
Jennifer,
As a working mommy of two young kids I have struggled with that same feeling. What can I contribute? How can I make an impact? What skills or gifts did God give me that can be used to His glory? (I could go on and on) Someone sent me a story years ago that I read whenever I feel that way, hopefully it will help you as much as it does me..
http://www.parenthood.com/article-topics/perspective_on_motherhood_the_invisible_woman.html/full-view
From a fellow builder. God Bless!
I’ve read this before, and thank you for reminding me! I struggle with this concept (that darn ego again!), but really it is what I should aspire to, right? I don’t want to be invisible to my family, but I do want what i do to be a monument to my family and to God and not to myself. I think what makes this whole essay come home for me is the comment about the kid taking his friend home for Thanksgiving, and saying that you will love it at my Mom’s house – everything is perfect. Message received…
Thank you!
J
Best letter ever…probably because it was written by a redhead.
What a way to start the day. G, there are no words. Just that lifty feeling thingy. xo
LOVE this!! Thank you Glennon, Mindy and Megan for sharing your lives with us. Megan – I hope you share this with your doctor, because it was his thought to hook you and Mindy up that started you on this particular path, and he should know the good he did! Maybe he’ll pass the word to OTHER doctors and this kind of thing will become normal behavior for them and help so many other people get through their hard times together.
Laura
Thank you so much for sharing Megan’s words. I sit here with tears streaming down my face. I needed to read this tonight (in Japan), as my friend goes in for breast cancer surgery this morning (in Florida). It’s so hard to be far and not able to do anything but pray. I pray for a lot of things for her, but after reading this, especially that she has the kind of support that Megan and Mindy have given to each other…because Megan is right, we have no idea unless we’re the one going through it. Thanks for fostering such a sharing community here. *HUGS* to you.
hugs, Carrie, sending you and your friend love and light today!
beyond brutiful.
Sitting all by myself in my kitchen with my coffee and my dog and sobbing. What a beautiful post.
What a beautiful letter and story. Once again I sit at my desk at work with tears welling in my eyes… thank you for sharing with us.
This letter from Megan, and everything I read on your blog, Glennon, reminds me of that saying, “We are all angels born with one wing, and the only way we fly is to hold onto one another.”
“Thank you” seems like much too small a phrase to offer you, Megan, Mindy and all the other Monkees, for what you do each and every day with love, but it’s all I have. That, and loads of love and prayers!
THANK YOU!!!!!
I will pray for continued recovery for both Megan and Mindy. As I experienced last week in my own life, prayers can have a HUGE effect in one’s life. Thank you once again Glennon for this incredible community and thank you to all you Monkees whose thoughts and prayers can bring such a deep sense of comfort and love to those in need.
Oh Glennon, I know I responded, but I can’t tell you how very very much I needed this today. Megan and Mindy are beautiful and I am so happy for them. I’m so sorry if you’re mad at me Glennon…. for talking too much…. but I thought once I got a job I would be all better. Instead, God gave me a job that makes me need you all and love you all so much more. I love you Glennon and I pray for you in my head and heart all the time! Thank you for showing up. Thank you so much!
What a beautiful letter. Thank you for reminding me of the power of our prayers this morning. This has touched my heart deeply…
Much love!!!
Oh. *happy tears*
Tears. Inspired.THIS was a great reminder to me that when my days seem hard… someone else’s may be harder. I love your heart Glennon and I thank you for continuing to come here and do this thing even when you are not feeling like doing it.
You are both so strong! Bruitiful letter. Big hugs xxxx
mornin’ G, thank you for sharing Megan and Mindy, they are amazeballs!! I’m not of the praying type, but there are days when I do reach up for something, especially on the days when the kids are hard, and I just want a nice soundproofed room to put myself into. much love, G!
do you reach up for wine? diet coke? ive been reaching up for kombucha energy drinks lately. It’s like a three hour vacation from my exhausted self.
usually for enough patience so I don’t play whack a mile before bedtime, that or an iced tea with lemonade
course that was supposed to be ‘mole’ LOL
Glennon,
There’s a verse that says that the Holy Spirit intercedes on our behalf with “sighs that can’t even be expressed”. I’ve always thought that since God can see our hearts – hearts that are so much more pure than our thoughts or emotions – he must look deep inside and see that we’re at least talking to him. Even if our minds are filled with “how the heck could this possibly work”, our hearts are for him and he relates to us based on the deepest cry of our hearts – those sighs that can’t even be expressed. Somewhere down there, if we’re talking to him, we trust. How’s that for comfort?
love, mj
YES Mandie JOY. YES! Also, you are aptly named.
Love, G