Apr 302012
 

 

 

This week shall heretofore be named: Miracle Week.

The theme of the incoming emails in my inbox this past month has been: G : I need a miracle. There are marriages crumbling, children suffering, homes foreclosing, parents dying, addicts spiraling, hearts breaking.

It’s bad. It can get really, really bad out there. Life is hard- NOT because you aren’t doing it right, just because it’s HARD. Whenever I write that, people say “No- that’s so negative- it’s all about perspective. Life is beautiful.” And that always makes me wonder for a bit. I wonder if they’re right, that maybe life isn’t hard, that maybe I’m just experiencing it too hard. But I always come to the conclusion that – Nope, I’m right. Life’s hard. Not just hard, downright impossible, BRUTAL sometimes. And they’re right, it’s beautiful, too. No denying that. And/Both.

So at Momastery, many of us have accepted the truth that life is BRUTIFUL.

LIFE IS BEAUTIFUL was a GREAT movie and a nice bumper sticker, but it doesn’t ring COMPLETEY TRUE to me. Sort of like the “Life is Good” shirts. I mean, I like those shirts. Love them, actually. But I won’t wear mine lately, just in case I run into my friend Anna, who just lost her precious and only son Jack in a freak drowning accident near her backyard. Life is not always good and it is not always beautiful. Life is just NOT OKAY sometimes. But it sure is knock-you-out-gorgeous sometimes, too.

Life is Brutiful. And/Both. That’s the thing. In every moment, things are both awful and good. Our children are healthy, but our friend’s children are not. We got a big promotion at work, but our beloved father is sick and not getting better. We feel blessed to stay home with our kids, but we really want to run away from home sometimes. We feel blessed to work and have good child care, but we miss our kids and feel guilty some days. We have beautiful homes, enough food on the table, and decent health care- but most folks don’t. We have healthy bodies, but we’re ten pound overweight. We have thin bodies, but they won’t work right.

And everybody’s always telling us to BE GRATEFUL BE GRATEFUL BE GRATEFUL and there is something to that. But for me, gratitude comes in moments, all encompassing, out of time moments- Kairos moments- and as a general knowing in the back of my head and heart. Gratitude is not always front and center for me.  And I don’t want to be bossed or guilt-ed into gratitude. Life is beautiful, and there is much for which to be grateful. But life is also tough. The big things are tough –  like I’m sick, and I’m not getting better, and the little things are tough, like – WHY IS THIS PLAYDOH SO FREAKING HARD TO OPEN? The big and the little stuff get me down. And that’s okay. No need to be grateful all the time. Really, it’s okay to notice the brutal. We can feel it, sit with it, and allow ourselves to acknowledge it. It won’t swallow us up forever, if we let ourselves go there, we’ll eventually see the beautiful again. We don’t have to feel grateful all the time, even if we’re living pretty sweet lives in comparison to the rest of the world. Pain is pain, and we all get the privilege of feeling it.

Anyway, my problem with all the pain my Monks share is that I can’t make miracles happen for them. This drives me an itty bit NUTS, as you might imagine. But I CAN use this blog to prove that miracles are possible. That they happen everyday. That there is reason to hope.

 

Kay- If you have a second today: Please reread this essay. Fourteen. It’s important. Don’t cheat and skip ahead.

 

Okay, are you back? Hello, Lovie.

 

So…. I’m at the zoo with the fam last week (one million mom points, done for the month) and I get an email. The email is from Mary Margaret. She has found my blog. She writes the following:

glennon.

 imagine my surprise to be reading the huffington post last week (while my husband was out of town and my son fast asleep in his crib) to stumble upon a blog written by someone named glennon. hmm, this reminded me of my old buddy, also named glennon, and caused me to do a quick google search of glennon doyle. i found your blog. i read your bio. i looked at your photos. i realized that this beautiful and accomplished mom had to be the same sad (but still amazingly fun), confused, teenager i came to adore as my roommate at dominion hospital so many years ago. your accomplishments, family and writing would be inspiring if i did not know you, but are even more so because our paths crossed back in the day. i am sure you get a million and one emails and mine is no different. you may not even remember me and that is fine, but i wanted to tell you that your candor, honesty and genuineness are clearly the real deal. thanks for giving me a new blog to check out and for reminding me that we have come a long way!

 love.

m

 

And I started crying right there in the reptile house.  I wrote back immediately and said, I’m here. I’m here. My heart stopped when I saw your name. Are you okay?

And she wrote back a few looooooong minutes later:

 

i am sorry i started an email conversation with you and then abandoned ship. i had to head out to a yoga class i was about to be late to. i live all the way across the country in washington state. just about 15 miles from seattle (where i used to live pre-child). i am healthy. i am married. my son is beautiful. XO.

 

 

She is healthy. She is married. Her son is beautiful. Please tell me- What are the chances? Sick little girls get better. Not all of them, but many do. In our eating disorder unit, 100 percent of us got healthy –  me and Mary Margaret. That end result was totally against the odds. No one in his right mind would have bet on it- certainly not our doctors- and so I call this a MIRACLE.

 

If you’d like to leave a miracle here, or on the facebook page sometime this week, take the time to do it, please. TRUST ME- there are people reading this who need reasons to hope. And they come here to find those reasons – to read stories to hold in their hearts as they walk tall through their bruitful days.

I LOVE YOU,  MONKS.

Back tomorrow- it’s Miracle Week, folks!!!!

 

LOVE,

G

 

 

 



Carry On, Warrior
Author of the New York Times Bestselling Memoir CARRY ON, WARRIOR
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  216 Responses to “Miracle Week!”

  1. My Dad passed away from a sudden heart attack seven years ago on April 12th. This sent my already struggling sister into a sprial of heavy drug use and alcoholism. Five years to the day she checked herself into rehab and has been sober for two years. A lot of hard work on her part and a little miracle from above has brought back our healthy, happy sister. We could not be more proud of her or her new “brutiful” life!

  2. My miracle is surviving my first day back at work after having our sweet baby girl. Hardest thing I’ve ever done leaving her behind today. But I survived. Thank God

    • I just started back last week. So hard. And each weeknight he has been really fussy, which makes it even harder. Good luck to you!

  3. This post and it’s responses have me smiling and crying. So far in my life I haven’t needed to pray for any miracles for myself or my family. I know I should feel fortunate but this scares me and leaves me with such worry that disaster is just around the corner, especially now that I have a son. I don’t want to live my life worrying.

    Prayers to all of you that have suffered so much! Your strength is so inspiring.

    • I just said to my mother in law today that I am afraid to exhale since my oldest who’s 4 has been born as most of our family and friends enjoy a pretty uneventful life and that’s been my miracle. We have had struggles but my heart breaks for every one dealing with life’s straight up unfair cards. Truly breaks and puts me at awe how lucky I have gotten. So I am with you on that one. Thank you Glennon for keeping us mindful and aware of the good, the bad and the brutiful!

  4. A year ago my husbands nephew, Charlie, who was autistic and epileptic, passed away peacefully in his sleep. The evening of his “celebration” (memorial service) a sweet golden retriever showed up in their yard and went straight to Charlie’s sister and didn’t leave her side. Turns out the dog belonged to a woman who lived very close to the church where Charlie’s celebration was held, not close at all to where our family lives, and she was going through a terrible divorce and her children were going away to boarding school and she couldn’t handle the dog any more. She was thrilled and relieved to have Charlie’s family adopt Angus. All of us in the family believe that dog was sent by Charlie to love his family physically, when he could not. Angus has been such a loving comfort and is helping every day to heal their hearts.

  5. I believe in miracles, but why do some people get miracles and others don’t?

    • And that’s the rub isn’t it? We have to believe that the miracle maybe wasn’t ours to have – and that our tragedy was another’s miracle. Hard to stomach….but it is how I look at that sometimes.

    • I have no answer to this… But I would like to add the thought that – I believe we are surrounded by miracles every day that we miss or overlook or are not evolved enough to recognize and understand. Perhaps one day we’ll be granted the wisdom and insight to look back into our lives and witness Gods true and loving hand in our lives.

    • i don’t know! i have seen so many miracles after my son’s death, but of course i’m wondering, why didn’t we get the miracle we REALLY wanted.

    • Jenny, Anna,

      I can’t imagine the pain you’ve gone through (literally can’t, because to allow myself to simply think about trying to imagine it is much too painful). And I hope you’ll consider what I have to say as encouragement and that I pray you’ll both get your miracles in the future.

      I have lost 2 fathers – my biological father was lost to a drunk driver when I was a small child, and more recently the step-father who raised me to cancer. That means my mom has lost 2 husbands. She’s also lost 2 of her brothers, both of her parents, 4 nephews, and countless other more distant family members. My mom knows loss, and yet with each loss she becomes stronger, not weaker. She embraces life more, not less. She has taught me that while not everything in life makes sense, we can make sense from it. (I like this better than “everything happense for a reason” – because there should be no reason for someone to be taken from us).

      The pain you’ve experienced has changed your life forever. From this point forward, make sense from it. For example, Anna – your blog, your writing, it helps people you don’t even know dealing with loss. Your loss makes no sense, but what you’ve done because of it brings some sense to the world.

      You’ll both see your babies again some day, I truly believe it. Keep that fact in your hearts, and continue to make sense in life until that day comes.

  6. Thank you, Glennon. I am having a bad week/month/year and needed some faith. Usually I do okay, but I am really struggling today. I actually laid in bed this afternoon and said, “I need something to tell me that everything is gong to be ok.” And then I find your post tonight. Thank you.

  7. Just stumbled upon your blog and was really touched by your post. I’m a single mom to a 2 1/2 year old little boy who never runs out of energy. This wouldn’t be such a big deal if I wasn’t 43 years old, work full time… and did I mention single? I’ve been going through a long drawn out divorce process… after his father relapsed multiple times on drugs… and I finally couldn’t keep all the balls in the air. I chose to protect my son first and foremost. I’ve been through all the stages of grief. I’ve been bitter, I’ve been mad, I’ve been angry… I’ve been sad, I’ve complained… a lot. But just a few days ago I heard a story about a woman who touched thousands and thousands of lives, she never left her home… couldn’t because of her disease, but blogged and made friends online and have this incredible attitude. Her motto was “choose joy.” After hearing her story… I couldn’t stop crying. It was then and there I decided to choose joy as well. I could still sit in my mess and complain… because life is hard, things are tough and of all things, I work at a homeless shelter. But life’s too short. It’s not promised. I’m going to choose joy!

  8. I was diagnosed with stage 4 breast cancer in 2008. I’m still alive, in spite of suffering a recurrence in October. I get chemo once a week and will for the rest of my life, provided it keeps working, wrap my lymphademic arm in bandages every night and a compression sleeve every day, and watch my four amazing daughters grow up, I’m not grateful every day, because it’s damned hard living life like this, and my bone-weary fatigue overwhelms me on a regular basis. But I’m really glad I’m alive.

  9. First Thank you G for sharing this story. Beautiful, Brutiful and MUCH more! I am a new Monkee but LOVE the movement and LOVE that is shared amongst complete strangers. We all have experienced some sort of miracle at least once in our lives, perhaps more.
    My little miracle just turned 3 this month. She was born with a speech disorder called Apraxia. It affects the motor movements of speech. Basically her brain doesn’t communicate with her muscles properly and she has a VERY hard time learning how to say sounds and words. BUT God is a healer – he may not perform it in an instant miraculous moment for reasons unknown to us but he HEALS and he is healing my daughter each day a little more. She now has about 50 words and is putting words together into two word phrases. Yes she is about a year behind or more in her speech development but she is thriving and she is beautiful and she has taught me more about life in the past 3 years than I ever knew before. Thank you God for putting her in my life and leading me down a very BRUTIFUL journey with my little angel. :)

    • Elizabeth, Welcome, I love that you have come to be a monkee with us! I love to hear about your miracle! Thank you for being here!

  10. I became a mother for the first time at 43. My son is my walking, talking miracle. We tried to have a family for 11 long years, before he was miraculously given to us. If I connect all of the random points in our 11 year journey (during some very spiritually, financially and mentally bankrupt times) that have led to his sudden appearance in our lives – there is no way you could not believe a Higher Power was at work.

    He is a result of Coincidence & Synchronicity in my life. I was told once upon a time in my spiritual trek to look for God in the coincidence and synchronicities. I have found Him there. And I am blessed. My son turns 2 in 13 days.

    Thank you Glennon for being a brutiful voice… and quite often my voice.

  11. I’m going to go out on a limb and ask for help. Something I hardly ever do. Our family needs a specific prayer to be answered. For us to be able to return home. We’ve been on an expat contract and we desperately want to go home. THIS YEAR. Yesterday would be good too. So there. I’m asking and I’m going to not regret it or feel ashamed, rather going to wipe the tears, get back to work and trust, that it WILL happen. Thank you Monkees and Glennon for an amazing community. xxx

  12. Just like tough things can be really big but also small, miracles also come in many shapes and sizes. I am so amazed and overwhelmed by all of the miracles you have all shared. But I just wanted to share a small miracle. Not the life-changing kind, but the kind that happen to all of us with some frequency. The kind that, if we notice them, can help us to find gratitude. Again, maybe not the big, capital Gratitude, but just the feeling that Someone has our back when we need it.

    One of my little miracles this week was when the only three hours of sunshine after 10 straight days of rain were during my daughter’s birthday party.

    I hope this doesn’t belittle the term miracle. It is such a beautiful thing, and I like the idea of having the opportunity for miracles in our daily lives without requiring huge amounts of pain or problems preceding them. But somehow the two seem like different things. Like putting a dry birthday party and a healthy baby beating the odds in the same category just isn’t right. Maybe we need another new word? I live in Switzerland right now, and they are very fond of adding the suffix “-li” to a word when referring to something small. Perhaps we can try to be grateful for our “miracli” while praying for our “Miracles.”

    • I don’t think it belittles the term Miracle at all and I like your word miracli! It’s perfect Today I had a miracli also, I had really wanted a dutailier glider for when i have my fourth baby in July. But they are very expensive and even on craigslist they go so quickly if it’s a good deal and usually for a bit higher than I can really afford while we’re in the process of moving. Not when i have an old rocker that is perfectly serviceable, you know? But I saw an old listing by chance, over two weeks old, and by craigslist standing that is old indeed! She had spelled the name wrong, so people looking for a dutailier had missed it. I emailed her and within hours the lovely and comfortable glider is in my living room.
      So, like yours it’s not a life-changing miracle but it’s a lovely miracli that felt like a kiss from God. The very glider I so wanted for with this last baby for a price I could afford. It’s like He hid it there for me to find!

  13. I have three miracles to share…
    1- By the time I was 19 I was both diagnosed bi-polar and was bulimic.
    At 29 I am healthy and balanced and healed and free.
    2- In 2010 I had two healthy sons who were 10 and 5 and we decided to have another baby, but instead we had two miscarriages back to back. I had never known hurt like that before. We decided to put off trying again for a while, possibly ever but the very next month got our surprise- Victoria Ann, our Victory baby.
    3- After she was born I did want another baby, I wanted four children, but it didn’t make sense financially. I stay home and we live on one modest income and our home is quite small, there just wasn’t room or money enough for another baby. So my husband got a vasectomy. Then several months later, after we were ‘all clear’ when my daughter was only 4.5 months old I got pregnant anyways. Then my husband got a raise and a promotion. Then God opened door after door and we will be moving into a brand new home that is 1200 sq feet larger than our current home and has more than enough room. Our little miracle Benjamin will be born in July.
    I have my four living children, my two girls waiting for me in Heaven,we have so much love, we will have enough money and enough room. It didn’t make sense when I miraculously got pregnant after the vasectomy but God had a plan to give me all my heart desired even though it didn’t make sense. Life is Brutiful, my miracle is that for now, the beauty is outweighing all else.

    I hope that hearing of my miracles blesses someone.

  14. I was put on bedrest, with both of our daughters, at 32 and 28 weeks respectively, due to utero-placental insufficiency. Our oldest did great. Our second struggled, and it was her own mother that was betraying her. At 33 weeks, i hadn’t felt her move for 24 hours. We rushed to the hospital. My OB happened to be on call and asked the nurse just to do a quick doppler to check the heartbeat. The nurse couldn’t find one. At this point, i was hysterical…out.of.my.mind…hysterical. My normally calm OB yelled for the ultrasound machine…and then…we saw her….and her heartbeat. A strong, beautiful heartbeat. It was one of the worst and best moments of my life. She’s now, 2…and healthy. I just grabbed her and her 4 y.o. sister some animal crackers. They are our miracles.

  15. Dear Glennon,

    I have often thought of writing a comment regarding other topics of discussion, but I must say your current essay has propelled me to share one of my life’s most beautiful miracles. After almost 4 years of waiting for our child to come home from Africa we became a forever family on September 7th, 2011. Our decision to adopt was a very natural progression for us. After 3 years of trying the old fashion way we decided that the most important thing was to have a family. For years I always knew that I would adopt from Africa and when we decided that we would pursue adoption, our continent had been chosen and choice of country came soon after. About 1.5 years into our adoption our agency declared bankruptcy. Lot’s went on in the background that I could write about, but the most important thing is that all 450 families adopting through our agency banded together and brought our agency out of bankruptcy. With that being said we still had a long road ahead of us but at least it was becoming a little more clearer. Finally after another 2 years of waiting we got the call last February that a sweet little boy named “Sitota” had been chosen for us, or should I say we were chosen for him :) Next should have been the news that a court date had been scheduled for us to attend. Then in March the news we did receive was that our file had been flagged because on our 2 year medical update that occured the previous August it had been noted that I was on anti-depressants for anxiety….hmmm, I wonder why I would be treated for anxiety??!! The reason our file had been flagged is because our adopting country had just decided that any parent suffering from any form of mental illness or taking any medications may no longer be able to adopt from their country. Needless to say I jumped on both my computer and phone and was contacting all parties involved with this decision to declare that I was indeed mentally sane and would be cleared by my Dr. Let’s just say that we were living on pure adrenaline and would have walked to the end of the earth and back to prove that I was infact sane…..I treaded lghtly because god forbid my actions to prove my sanity would be mistaken for insanity….lot’s of reiki took place during these couple of months to keep myself centered :) So this takes us to May and we finally receive word that our file will go to court!!! We are still not in the clear though because although we had to travel half way around the world to make an appearance in court that lasted roughly 3 minutes, we were still waiting for a letter that needed to be written in support of our adoption. If that other governing body decided that we were not fit our adoption would not go through. So after we attended court in June 2011 and met our little boy during the same trip (which was they best day of my life aside from the day we received his referral), we waited another 21 days to hear the verdict…..again, lot’s or reiki….then in mid July we received word that “WE PASSED”!!! Apparently I’m not crazy!!! During this one heck of an almost 4 year roller coaster ride, which I would do a million times over, we were finally able to hold our son for the very first time on September 7th, 2011 :) In my son’s country each name is hand selected my birth mom and each meaning is very important, in my son’s case his name being “Sitota”…..aka “gift from god”….enough said. I hope you have enjoyed reading our beautiful miracle story as much as I enjoy reading all that you poor yourself into. I have never read any other essays that have touched me so deeply and I am incredibly grateful that another monkee put me on to your blog :)

    Wishing you love & light,
    Nadine

    P.S Please pardon any spelling or grammatical errors I was just so excited to share my story with everyone :)

  16. Miracles:

    After battling an addiction to opiates, Jesus Christ SET ME FREE after I went to rehab. He changed my heart forever, which is a TRUE miracle, giving me a desire for Him and for a life free from the prison of addiction.

    My daughter, born at 25 weeks gestation, weighing 1 lb. 12 oz. and unable to survive without assistance of machines is PERFECTLY healthy and thriving today. She spent 3 months in the NICU, but is now a bubbling, happy 2.5 year old.

  17. I have several wonderful amazing miracles in my life that I will write and share because sharing them helps you remember and helps those who need to read them, but for now I am asking for prayers in my own miracle – need.

    My husband and I are having a really rough time and are planning to separate this summer after 12 years of marriage. I am devastated and am trying not to look too far ahead, trying not to be discouraged and trying to be strong. He is struggling with depression and addiction issues (diagnosed only by me, he is unwilling to see either) and he has shut himself off emotionally from every one and every thing. Please pray for him and for us (I’ll take the prayers for me too but I already feel very blessed to be surrounded by friends and prayers!)

    Thank you Monkees – 27,000 prayers goes a long way!! :)

  18. My cousin-in-law needs a miracle now: her husband was in a horrible car accident, very, very far from home, and his recovery is uncertain. Or rather, she and her family need a second miracle.

    My miracle was finding the courage to tell the truth about how badly I needed help — before doing anything irrevocable and unforgivable — and finding a person who understood, immediately, what help I needed.

    • I LOVE that your miracle was asking for help. Gave my chills. Love your perspective, and glad someone listened, heard, understood… and helped.

      Positivity for your cousin-in-law.

    • Kew – Prayed for your cousin this morning and for you. Thank you for sharing your story and for being so open and honest. Thanks to God for providing you with a person – we all need a person in life to truly see us and help us. Glad you found yours!

  19. And sometimes the miracles are in the little things…..but they are absolutely miracles!

  20. Thanks, G. As always, you share your heart with us and our hearts are open to receive. Miracles are real and life is hard. I so needed to hear this and it was so reassuring and encouraging. God puts people in our lives and works through them to heal and bless us. Your blog and the Monkee community has been that for me. Love and peace.

  21. Finding a real relationship with God amidst a bruitiful world is my miracle. I grew up in an emotionally and verbally abusive home, where we were Catholic by decree, and all the ‘religious’ hoopla that went with it. We put on an amazing show, and I carried the torch into adulthood. Drinking and cutting to numb the pain when it got to be too much, until I got to the point where I really couldn’t feel anything anymore. Recently we moved into a community where authenticity is really the only standard accepted, and its safe. The walls are coming down, feelings are slowly but surely starting to eek back in, and I’m learning all about the real war we are in, the one no one ever explained to me before. The reason everything is all f’ed up is because there is a force actively opposing ALL the good, pleasing, and perfect will of God. No one ever spoke of that force before this community I’ve found. I’m finally understanding that while God is not the author of evil, he does allow it to occur from time to time, so that he can work ALL things together for the good of those who love him (Romans 8 someplace). So that when his lights continue to shine bright against the most BRUTAL circumstance, so many others will see those beautiful shining lights, and hopefully at one point find their way home.

    • Just felt as though you could use a /hug after reading your post. Glad you’re finding your way through your pain to the other side.

      • Thanks Ingrid :) You are sweet… I found G’s online community shortly after moving as well… It seems this crazy world is just starting to make some sense, and I’m trying to shake that feeling of waiting for the other shoe to drop, but believing when it does, this time I’m not alone. Hope you are having an amazing day!

    • Woah… your story and mine are similar… not the same because no two stories are but here I felt as though I was reading about a piece of myself. It’s Romans 8:28 and that verse is what I live my life on these days. Thankful for you!

  22. When my mother was far along in her pregnancy with my sister, who was born at the end of January, she was driving and hit a patch of black ice. Anyone who has ever driven on black ice knows that it hits suddenly and can be nearly impossible to control. After attempting to turn into the swerve and gain control of her car, to no avail, my mother braced her arms against the steering wheel to protect the baby as best she could, shut her eyes, and prayed. All of a sudden, though she had not moved, the car stopped swerving and sliding, and righted itself into a straight, controlled path.

    Whether you believe that it was god, my sister’s guardian angel, or the universe looking out for her, there is no denying that it was a miracle.

  23. Glennon, I love how you call the world Brutiful– it is so true! 4 1/2 years ago we lost our 3rd child when he was 8 days old to a virus that he contracted some time after birth that went straight to his heart. The miracle, as I see it, is now I can honestly say I am surviving and thriving– we as a family are surviving and thriving after the hardest loss we’ve ever faced. 10 months after losing Graham, I became pregnant with twins and we just celebrated their 3rd birthday yesterday. So while I am happy, I still feel the “brutiful”. There are absolutely days that are really hard, days that I am angry that I don’t get to have my little boy here with me. But there are also days that I see a dragonfly or feel the wind or have some other inkling that he is still with me and that some day I will get to be with him again. And then there are regular old days where we go about our life and that feels good, too.
    Thank you for writing the way you do!

  24. “Fourteen” has stuck with me all these months, and I’ve often wondered about MM and been glad that you had each other during that difficult time. The irreverent “attack the diners/stand there and starve” part makes me laugh every.single.time.

    I am SO HAPPY that you are both here and healthy and talking to each other again. =-)

    As a previous poster said – thanks, Glennon for “embracing the paradoxes of life” and writing about them.

  25. Thank you Glennon for making me feel “ok”. Sometimes I feel my perspective on life is all jacked up. That I’m negative because I hurt when I’m fortunate and others are struggling. It breaks my heart. And, I’m angry when others are fortunate and I am struggling. I know it’s not very grateful, but it’s how I FEEL. I don’t like it, but it’s real.

    I have learned that the tough times do in fact make me stronger and that they haven’t killed me yet. So the old “what doesn’t kill you makes you stronger”, must be true. :) My miracle story, although I have several, is about my husband. Here goes.

    15 years ago I was lonely. I was 29 and everyone around me seemed to be getting married, having children, living life. I was not. I was dating bad men, living alone, working a ton and sad. Not “kind of” sad, but really, really sad. Down in my belly, deep in my heart, can’t keep being sad kind of sad. It was horrible. I prayed hard every day. Prayed that love would come to me. That I would someday have a loving husband, beautiful children, wonderful blessings, and family chaos. It was only a week or so from my darkest night, when I had prayed for guidance. On that night I checked my messages and a man I was friends with called and asked me to have dinner with him. I quickly said “no”, because I never imagined myself with him. I eventually changed my mind, went on a date, and eventually married him.

    Eighteen months after that first date, we married. We married with him on crutches, unable to walk because of a serious injury. The doctor’s were telling us he might lose his foot, but we moved ahead. We had to, right? Two months into our marriage he had surgery to repair the injury. One day later, he lay on our guest bed dying. Suffocating due to a pulmonary embolism. I thought he was resting, but as I made my way up the stairs, trying to be quiet and not wake him, I stopped. I stood at the landing of our stairs, staring at the bedroom door. Should I check on him, or go to bed? If God can physcially nudge you, he did that night. I walked into that guest bedroom, turned on the light and found my new husband blue, barely breathing, dying. I dialed 911, and he was rushed to the hospital.

    One week later I brought him home and our life restarted. We had a totally different perspective on work, love, happiness, etc. We had been given an amazing gift. From a horrible situation came knowledge that made us both more peaceful. That life & love is fleeting and should be appreciated. From bad things come good things.

    I thank God every day that I was nudged into that room. I now have two beautiful children, 3 beautiful dogs and a husband of 13 years. I am so blessed.

  26. I agree it IS miracle week…I could share so many miracle stories here, but what I really want to share it this….I am EXPECTING God to do 3 miracles THIS WEEK!

    1) We are adopting a little girl from Haiti and we have our fundraiser meal this Sunday. We have been praying for God to move our paperwork along in super fast God-time and I think it would be amazing to tell all of our supporters this Sunday that we are through the first part of the process on Haiti’s end (which should take months and months more time). This would be a miracle for sure!

    2) I would also LOVE to see the miracle of the last of our adoption costs covered! We have $8073 left to raise out of our $29,000. Please pray that God would prompt hearts to help us reach that goal in a miraculous way THIS WEEK!!!! Follow our story at: [email protected]

    3) To bring a dear friend and her husband’s marriage that has been separated for almost 2 years now back to terms THIS WEEK for moving forward together. The miracle in this would be the husband turning back whole-heartedly to the God he has decided to question instead of follow.

    Thank you for inspiring us to believe in miracles, to keep our eye out for seeing them right in front of us, to remind us of how many the Lord has truly given to us throughout our lives, and to still know He is making them happen even now–even THIS WEEK!!!!

    Blessings!

  27. God bless you and Mary Margaret. Thank you for sharing your miracle. Here is mine.
    Ten years ago, while pregnant, i became very sick. In a surgery to save my life, I lost my baby girl, Hope. When I woke up without my baby, I was devastated. I questioned God. Why would God force me, His beloved child, to live with the guilt that my baby died so that I could live. The doctors also said that during the surgery my fertility was lost. I went home to dark times, and tried to take of the three beautiful children that God had allowed me to keep. And every hour of every day I wondered if the God of my childhood really was in control.
    THEN, I found out I was pregnant. My OB ordered me in immediately. Told me this was impossible. That something must be very wrong. A very early ultrasound was done, and there was Annie (at that time referred to as Bean). I have always believed that the Bible was God’s love letter to me–His action plan of love for me. But that year He sent me my own personal love letter in my daughter Annie. If ever again I wonder if He is still in control, I just need to look into her sweet face.
    My memory of Hope still brings sadness–she is my tender hip–the reminder of my wrestle with God that will never leave me–a reminder that while this life contains beauty and joy, this is not my Home.

  28. I have 3 miracles in my house!

    Close to 95% of babies born to mothers co-infected with both HIV and Hepatitis C will also contract both viruses which are notoriously difficult to treat together. Our youngest child beat these odds and is free and clear of both viruses today.

    Of babies born to mothers with syphilis, 40% are still-born and a high percent have major medical issues including mental retardation. Our oldest was born with syphilis passed to him by his first mother and today brought home progress reports with all A’s. He has no medical issues.

    Our daughter is one of 3 children in her age group worldwide who just “happened” to meet all the criteria for a study drug for a condition she contracted at birth. Two years later she is off the drug which has almost eradicated the virus from her body.

  29. I had a baby with a guy who had been in prison, an upstanding guy, a smart guy, a guy from our church, who we were all convinced was innocent. I got pregnant while he was out, but before I knew I was, he went back in….to complete the sex offender program and hopefully come home in one year. That didn’t happen. While I was pregnant, I broke it off, and we didn’t converse anymore. I called his parents (whom I still love but never have contact with) when my daughter was born, and they (and his mom’s parents) came to see me in the hospital.
    He got out of prison a long while later. I took my daughter to meet him once or twice, but he never played with her. When he got out, he wanted visitation. He said he wanted to sit in the stands at her soccer game and say, “That’s my daughter.” I put him off, waiting for a lawyer’s advice. We (my lawyer, my new husband, and I) decided we wanted to wait till she was 5. We lost. The guardian ad litem never even met my daughter, but decided that visitation – unsupervised visitation – would be beneficial because he was her father (despite the daddy she already had 24/7). We lost. We lost, we lost, we lost.
    We met with a visitation house and felt comfortable with the women who ran it, who blessedly told us that most fathers get tired of the committment and end up not coming. We felt grateful and we cried, but still felt like we’d lost.
    The morning after I had signed the agreement, put it in an envelope, stamped it, and set it on the desk to go in the mail, I woke up to an email. No explanation from my lawyer except that he “anticipated trouble from me” and he had signed off on his parental rights. Just like that. And I haven’t seen him (or, unfortunately, his parents) since.
    God is SO good. That. Was a miracle.
    And, for the record, she – now 8 years old – couldn’t care less about soccer.

  30. Here is my little miracle story.
    http://aaaplusone.blogspot.com/2011/01/good-ending.html
    He is 8 months old today, He is wonderful & chubby and he looooves his mama.
    Life is brutiful and hard.
    I’m praying for miracles all over today.

  31. i heart this post so much. for mary margaret, for you and for the whole monkee family and beyond.

    love you g. mean it. thank you.

  32. I grew up with an alcoholic mother who would pick us (my sisters and I) up from school/tennis/dance etc… and she would be ripped. It is an absolute miracle that we were NEVER in a car accident and that my sisters and I do not abuse alcohol ourselves. It is also a miracle that my mother, although still an active alcoholic, is still alive and still hasn’t been in an accident. I love her and maintain a relationship with her (only when she’s sober) and that is also a miracle to me. Thanks for the post and if anyone wants to imagine their own miracle, google the miracle question of solution-focused therapy (I was a family/individual therapist before becoming a stay-at-home mama).

  33. My continuing miracle: Three of my very premature quadruplets are still alive and well almost 11 years later. One of them had a very, VERY serious brain bleed. Worst case scenario was she would never walk, talk, learn or doing anything but be in a vegetative state. Today she is a healthy 5th grader who reads above grade levels, competes in spelling bees and sings beautifully with no asthma. Miracles DO happen!

  34. I just wanted to share about my littlest miracle Charlie. All children are miracles, but Charlie has beat all odds to be my living, amazing, smiling miracle. He was born 2 1/2 years ago after suffering a stroke in utero. We were told by our neurosurgeon under no circumstances would he live. It may be a few hours or a few days…but he will not get better and will definitely not live a life where he would be able to interact with us. After a lot of STUFF, Charlie is a talkative, happy little boy with the biggest brown eyes you have ever seen. He loves his brother and sister, loves to play, and crawls all over the house. Life is still tough, it is busy, there are lots of therapy appointments, there are worries that overwhelm me, but he is a daily reminder that miracles do happen everyday.

    • Your miracle hit home for me. My youngest, who turned 5 in February, had a stroke either in utero or during/shortly after birth. Every day, I am thankful that she is here and I am happy to report that she is completely ‘okay’ in every way. She is my daily reminder that miracles do happen and I’m glad that both you and I got to experience that reality firsthand :)

  35. When I was just a few weeks old, God spoke to my mother and told her to go pick me up. So she did. I had been sleeping in my crib, and she hadn’t planned to wake me up. When she picked me up I inhaled like I hadn’t inhaled in a while… I was an adult when Mom told me this story, and she told me at a time when I really needed to know that God wants me here, on this earth, in this family, right now. Two-part time-delay miracle. I seem to recall that story when things are going really well for me, because I’ve been energized by success in my personal and professional life. Those are always touchpoint moments for me that clue me in to my purpose in life, which I’m always discovering, but which I know is important, because, well, it’s a miracle when God speaks to your mama.

  36. I completely agree – Life is Brutiful. There is no better term, actually. I’m a 36 year old imperfect woman, peacefully married to a kind hearted man with whom we made beautiful twin boys a few years ago. It’s not without work though – work on myself. I spent most of adolescence placed on my own pedestal of perfection – high achiever, class president, athletic, etc…. but on the inside I was angry and resentful about many life experiences that were out of my control. It wasn’t until college and a very fateful two month long Outward Bound hiking trip that I began to unravel and inspect the threads that knitted ME together. I found quite few threads that needed repair.

    I went hiking as an irrational girl that shouldn’t feel upset by things, or what people said. That I should be strong, not cry, be fearless. I was just being a ‘girl’ but it turns out unresolved feelings boil to irrational levels and explode over time. On this fateful trip, where survival against the freezing elements was a daily task, I learned to communicate. I learned that I needed to feel things in the moment and acknowledge my feelings as I felt them. I was very COLD, I couldn’t ignore feeling that and we had to work together to all feel WARM. I learned how to say things like “What did you mean by that comment, because this is how I interpreted it.” when something bothers me.

    Up until that trip, I had spent a lot of time hurting people before they could hurt me. I did a lot of running from real feelings. After 3 days camping by myself with just a journal and enough time to hash out my past, present, and future, I came out of that intense meditation with a strong sense of who I had been and who I wanted to be. I realized that I needed to love ME first, and even better, I DID.

    My relationships today are much healthier. I feel things, irrational or not, they are mine alone and I have a right to feel them. No one can read my mind. I am the only one who can make me happy so I try to put myself in situations that encourage my happiness. It’s a much better energy to put out into the universe. Being a friend makes me happy. Finding a way to help someone makes me happy. No one but me completes me. I am married because I want to share my life with someone- the same with our children. Since life is so brutiful and unpredictable, I have learned that what I contribute matters and I try and choose positive contributions whenever possible. This is my miracle.

    • Thank you, Andrea. Your story is my story and you said it so well. I experienced a persistent and lingering sadness over many, many years despite being highly functioning achiever. No amount of success or offering good karma to the world would free me from this hidden suffering. When the sadness would manifest itself in the form of uncontrollable tears, I feared I was forever broken, an irreparable soul.

      It turns out that what was wrong was not allowing myself to acknowledge feelings, to FEEL sad, to be vulnerable, to ask for help, to feel empathy for MYSELF, and to have a voice. I was so afraid of anyone knowing that I had a struggle that fit under the heading of “mental health,” which is such a taboo in our culture.

      I hurt deeply for others who experience issues of mental health, harmful thought patterns, and secret suffering. I make a point to tell them about my experience, although I am still embarrassed by my weakness sometimes (work in progress… trying to convince myself that there is strength in weakness). I feel I now have eyes to see others suffering and am hopeful that I can love them where they are to let them know they are not alone. This all seems lovely and miraculous. It’s also risky and TRUE HEROISM to seek wholeness. We cannot love others or enter into their pain if we are so wrapped up in our own.

      Glennon, your words have been so helpful in continuing to help me, because I believe one of the harmful thought patterns we have in our culture is that life should ALWAYS be awesome, that if we experience pain or hardship we’ve messed up. Pain is not failure, it’s part of life, and something we have to work through. We must learn to hold pain and hope in the same hand. I am learning to embrace the brutal with the beautiful, and there, have found a space for healing and wholeness. When I compare to the half life I lived before and the fact that I didn’t know wholeness was possible, it feels like outrageous grace to me. Miracle.

      • K, blew it in mentioning the true miracles of my experience:
        -finding a wonderful man who loves me as I am and encourages me to be whole
        -finding a faith community that encouraged me to take risks to address my brokenness and to be authentic, that abides in love
        -finding a wise and empathetic counselor who walked with me through all the mess I carried
        -learning that there is work to be done and though it can be SO HARD, shining light on things and working through them can bring freedom
        -friends who loved me unconditionally, and even pursued me
        -having a son who will not have to know “sad” mom
        -beginning conversations with family to address some of the issues that gave rise to the pain, and finding love and support in return, even after years of poor communication
        -reaching out in love to a friend experiencing something similar – and crossing my fingers that in some crazy way telling my story could mitigate another’s suffering

        Also, wanted to say that there are so many in the middle of their pain (in the middle of the storm) and I am so sorry. Sometimes things are hard and they don’t resolve. Facing the hard things (while holding the hands of others tightly) is the heroic part. If you’re in the middle of the storm, hold on.

        • Sarah – Thank you so much for sharing! I feel strength in the connection of our stories and you too beautifully expressed the work and the people behind your miracle. We so rarely walk alone even when we sometimes feel alone. Something I have to remind myself from time to time. Carry on Warrior Monkee!

  37. I think this qualifies as a miracle.

    It’s the story of a young mother and her family having to look at some very hard truths and decide if they would live or deny them. It’s beautiful. It’s hard. It’s BRUTIFUL. And it’s the best love story I’ve heard in a long, long time.

    http://ayoungmomsmusings.blogspot.com/2012/04/unwrapping-onion-introduction.html

    • Holy Wow… is that ever a miracle?!? A long read, to get through all 9 parts of the blog series, but WOW…. I would consider myself a ‘Christian’, and think this is the best story of evolution of the human psyche EVER, on one of the most controversial issues EVER! There is a LOT of content to cover in the Bible, but it was pretty specific, the two biggies, were love God and love others… I think if people could just work on that for awhile, we’d have a whole lot more of the same kind of evolution.

    • Loved, loved, loved. Thanks for sharing, Holly!

  38. As a child and teenager, I suffered unimaginable neglect and abuse at the hands of my father, mother, and subsequently two different stepmothers–but I’m still here, and I have a healthy marriage, a wonderful child, a good job, and great friends.

    At four my birth mother walked out of our lives for good, after three months in which she had custody of me and my brother and failed to care for us–my brother stopped talking for nearly a year after that. She was about to put us in foster care when my father, a chronic marijuana addict (I’m talking smoking 6X/day, while caring for children; I’m talking having his 4 year old daughter sort out the seeds and stems from the marijuana buds because my hands were small and it kept me busy), took custody.

    He married a woman who hated us and told us so daily; I was so miserable that I didn’t eat much and she force-fed me against the kitchen wall. They eventually divorced because of their own issues–my father was and continues to be oblivious– and he married a narcissist who believes children exist to serve their parents. Despite being a straight-A student and working diligently on chores and housework, and rarely if ever breaking house rules, I was constantly in trouble for not anticipating and meeting their needs, for expressing any feeling or need of my own. I was berated and shamed and controlled; they took the paychecks from my 16 hour a week job to ‘pay for my clothing and phone calls’ despite being upper middle class. I spent the years from 12 to 22 extremely depressed, only kept from committing suicide by the fear I would get it wrong and be in even more trouble. I prayed for death regularly. When I was 17 and really close to the edge, my high school guidance counselor said that what my parents did was clearly abuse but because it wasn’t physical or sexual, there was nothing she could do, but she encouraged me to just hang on until college, when I would be free.

    I’ve spent the last 20 years since then working on healing–the last ten, with the help of an incredible therapist and a wonderful husband. I have moderate to severe chronic anxiety, and life is often much, much harder than it needs to be. But the first miracle is this: I found unconditional love from a good man, and unconditional love for myself, an amazing faith community, and friends who treat me like family. I have a beautiful nearly-5 year old boy who will never experience the fear and horror my brother and I faced as children. I’m successful at work, making a fantastic living: my therapist says that the odds of all this rather than my ending up dead, permanently hospitalized due to mental illness, in jail, or homeless, are astounding.

    I’m forging a wonderful life for myself, and as of two weeks ago following yet another horrific visit with my parents (who showed up high at my son’s school during an hour-long presentation by the kids, in front of all the other families, and then berated me for hours about not honoring and respecting them enough), decided to finally let go of my parents emotionally, to drastically limit contact with them, and at last at the age of 37 to let go of trying to forge a good relationship with them. It’s been hard, and I’m struggling with the pain of realizing they never will change, but I’m healing finally. It’s never, ever too late for another miracle.

  39. In need of miracale right now…Reading your post has helped but in all honesty, my faith is shaken..not sure where to turn, what to do or how to feel…Please keep these stories of miracles coming, it really does put a smile on my face, if only for a moment.

    • Kate-

      There are 27000 monkees. Surely we have all been blessed with many strengths and talents. AND we are all part of THIS community and countless others, all rich with a variety of resources! Put us to good use! What do you need? How can we help you?

    • What did you need, sister? Like Karen said, we are here.

    • praying for you sweet Kate.

    • Oh Kate, no matter what it is. No matter what you need. You have over 27,000 Monkees. We will help to carry you. Oh Kate, I feel very very strongly to pray for you right here an right now. I don’t even know if you will come back to see this but I will.

      Dear heavenly Father, I pray to you right now for Kate. I stand fearlessly before your throne, Lord and I ask you to be with Kate right now. I pray that you would take what ever it is that has hurt and shaken Kate to the core and fashion it into blessing, love, and strength for her. Lord Jesus, I know that you heal, and you comfort. I know that you do not leave us alone. When we scream up at the seemingly empty sky, you answer us, not from a distance but right there beside us. We don’t understand your ways. We don’t understand why we have to go through the pain, but Lord you are in control and you work everything together for the good in You. Jesus, bless Kate and hold her close to you as she goes through this deepest ocean. Let her know you are there. Jesus precious name, Amen.
      Love and hugs Kate!

      • I usually don’t check back when I leave a comment, but for some reason this time I did. And I am so glad that I did. I don’t know what to do or to ask for right now, but reading all your supportive comments and prayers has lifted my spirits. As I read them I cried, but it was tears of joy and thankfulness to know that I really am not alone in my struggles. I know in my heart, deep, deep down, that we ( my family) will survive and even thrive after we climb this latest hurtle, but having all you Monkeys as a support system is awesome indeed, and humbling for sure. Thank you :)

  40. […] my new writing crush Glennon Melton posted a piece entitled (what else?) Miracle Week. It is, as usual, phenomenal (make sure you read the other post that she linked within today’s to […]

  41. G, you so often make me smile and cry and feel like it’s important to love and risk and care, even when I don’t know the ‘right’ thing to say or do. Thank you for being you, and for writing about the truth of it. J

  42. Your and/both made me think of what an bible teacher I had in high school used to say about the Kingdom of God. It’s already, but not yet. We see it breaking through in special moments, through special people and revelations, but it hasn’t come in its fullness yet. That’s why the world is brutiful: there is the sweetness of love and God, and the hardship of this life.

    There are miracles. I am one, and so are you. And you, and you and you.

  43. My uncle was in an ATV accident about 3 years ago. It happened on the road – hard concrete – and he wasn’t wearing a helmut…and his head hit hard. It also happened in pretty much the middle of nowhere, but the very first car to happen upon him was a registered nurse (surely, this was Divine Intervention!). She knew all the right things to do to keep him “comfortable” until first responders, ambulance, police and a Life Lion helicopter could arrive to transport him – not to the nearest hospital, but to the nearest “best trauma unit in the state.” The situation was dismal, to say the least. He lost a lot of blood and had a lot of brain damage. Our family joined together and prayed, and we prayed and we prayed. We prayed over him in the hospital, we prayed when we woke up in the morning, we prayed before bed, we prayed at church, in Bible Studies, before meals and every waking second we weren’t doing something else. The doctors said that if he made it past one week, his chances of survival would be better – but, still not hopeful. Today, three years later, my family has joined together to provide 24 hour in-home care for him, but he is regaining strength (still not walking) and working on his language skills (talks minimally). He is the single greatest miracle that I have ever witnessed. The first responders at the scene had no hope for him, but they still did their job and did it well. To this day, some of them still come to visit him because they can’t believe he survived!

  44. I love how you seem to wear your heart on your shoulder and are always willing to share whatever you’re going through. Thanks so much for this amazing community you’ve created. Loved this post and Fourteen always makes me cry.

    You are a Miracle, G!

  45. Bipolar disorder–not too many know the terrible toil that is suffered by those who have it and by their loved ones. My husband had bipolar disorder, and it was the most confusing and frustrating experience of our lives. I say he “had” it because, very miraculously, God chose to restore Him to sanity and to heal him in an instant. How many people get “healed” of bipolar disorder? I only know of one, and I have had the blessing of seeing the transformation firsthand. Our battle with that terrible disease ended 5 years ago, and my husband went from being crippled with depression, drugged to the high hilt, suicidal, and totally unpredictable…to the wonderful, healthy man he is today. He works a full-time job (a manager!), gives endless love and attention to me and our children, takes NO medication, and has re-earned my respect and admiration as a Godly leader in our home. We did nothing to deserve God’s favor, but He has lavished it on us anyway and changed the course of our lives forever. To read our story, you can go to http://www.WhenIRememberThis.com.

    Thanks for your blog on miracles, G! It was special to me for obvious reasons.

  46. I love this post. The power of prayer is amazing. Miracles happen each day.

    I just recently wrote about my little miracle born by Dr. Mericle. :) Here is my post:
    http://suchstoriestotell.blogspot.com/2012/04/our-long-journey-to-become-parents.html

  47. Wow. Wow. Wow. LOVE that she found you and that you’re both thriving.

    I do love me some miracles. Just this morning, Tony Osso, the filmmaker who did the short documentary film of us for The Devotion Project, sent us a 4 minute clip of us discussing our decision not to list Simon for a heart transplant when he was 5 months old (I’ll post a link when it’s public). Simon’s turnaround from when he qualified to be listed for a transplant to today when he has normal heart function is a freaking miracle if I ever saw one. Not sure what the future will hold but just getting to today and Laura and I being still totally in love after going through all that is a miracle if I ever saw one…

    • Jaime – I can’t possibly tell you how much the documentary touched me. Your family is an inspirational example of love and trust and all the reasons the world is such a beautiful place. Since the day I was introduced to your family by Glennon, I have kept you in my mind and tried to live at least a bit more lovingly, and supportively as I go through my days. Thank you for sharing yourselves.

      • Karen,

        *blushing* Thank you for your sweet, sweet words. It’s not all roses and rainbows at our house all the time, as you might imagine, but we do have a pretty good thing going :-)

        • What is so lovely is that you don’t make it look all rosey and rainbowy, you make it look worth the effort.

          Keep that good thing going. I’m in your corner all the way.

          Thanks again.

  48. Love this post, Glennon.

    After four painful miscarriages and a failed adoption, we were able to have two healthy babies. If you are going through fertility issues, please hold on to HOPE for your miracle.

  49. Here is my miracle story from just over a year ago.
    http://harvestingjoy.blogspot.com/2011/04/m-word.html

  50. Actually, I forgot – my brother-in-law had a miracle two years ago today. He came home from the hospital after 3 weeks in ICU and one in recovery, following a motorcycle accident. He was hit nearly head-on by an SUV and suffered massive internal injuries. We were told if the ambulance had arrived on the scene just a few minutes later, he would have bled to death en route. Miraculously, they were already out picking up breakfast at the nearby gas station and were on the scene in only one minute.

    The nurses said they never saw so much blood in the OR. His femoral artery was torn in three places, his diaphragm nearly ripped in half, his left shoulder cuff torn and elbow crushed. He lost his spleen and a foot of colon, and his intestines had to be repaired in several places. They gave him 10 units of blood in the OR and 3 more over the next few days. For a week the doctors refused to discuss any long-term outlook. They said patients like him do not arrive at the hospital alive and they could not predict.

    We lived in the waiting room for the first ten days. And prayed. Everyone we knew prayed.

    Today he is essentially the same person he was before the accident. His mobility is somewhat limited in his left arm, but not seriously. He has some dietary limitations, and the diaphragm repair will likely bring complications in about twenty years, since it’s something they normally do for much older patients and the netting may start to disintegrate. But every day he’s alive is bonus time, really. God answered prayer; and how!

  51. This is a great post. And thank you. Life is not always beautiful and it is so very hard. I am thankful for so many things but when is enough, enough? We all have our struggles no matter how big or how small. And damnit, it sucks sometimes. Down right sucks. I know. You know what I have been through. To each of us they are a struggle and there is no reason for anyone to apologize because someone complained about their own stuff, yet children in Somalia are starving. I do my part but I cannot fix everything but I can make a spark. That is all the man/woman upstairs asks for. Does that make sense?

    So, I just realized that you were in Dominion (Fourteen). So was my daughter.She follows you now. So glad she finally realizes how much you have in common. Actually when I started reading your blog I did so with her in mind. Remember the post about the Christine Aguilara song “Beautiful”? I was anonymous who countered. On our way back from Dominion to drop our baby off. (I was only anonymous because I couldn’t figure out how to create an account).

    Thank you always for being an inspiration to us all. And I am happy that Mary Margaret found her way too and you are in touch. We are all connected.

  52. It’s been said many times, but your posts are always wonderful. But today’s was just the balm I needed. I’m training to be a psychologist (three years down!), and today is the last day of my work with many clients that I have been seeing for the past nine months. The hard thing about being a therapist (especially a fairly transient one as we students are) is that you almost never know what happens after.

    So, as I am prepping for my sessions today, I read this and I cry. Because YES.

  53. Our miracle is still in the works. I’ll keep it in mind for next year. :)

  54. My first baby was born in Sept of ’08, my parents moved across country to be near us (and him). Three months after he was born, on Thanksgiving weekend, my mother was diagnosed with stage four breast cancer. She started chemo on New’s Eve, ’09 looked bleak. By a miracle of all miracles, she has survived. She’s almost three years out of treatment, so healthy her cancer doctor says not to come back for 6 months. In the past three years she has met three more grandbabies (two more of mine). Miracles happen. Life is hard, but life is here.

  55. Glennon, Friends-

    May I begin by saying, I do believe in the power of prayer. Also, I believe that prayer is only one of the many ways we may be able to help each other. I know that we can get things done. Life is hard. How can we make tomorrow easier for those who have an immediate, concrete need for help?

    Can we connect with each other ,and others, to bring each other resources? Can we ask for help in desperate times? Can we get specific, be bold, and ask?

    Glennon, thanks for another great post. It will help many people, you’ve probably already made miracles today with this spark of hope.

  56. Beautiful post…Life is very, very hard and very, very great at the same time. Joy and sorrow are twin sisters. We wouldn’t depend of mircacles or need anything bigger than ourselves actually if this were easy…but hard doesn’t mean impossible…hard doesn’t mean we can not conquer…”We conquer by continuing” and we are able to see the grace in every moment by realizing the hard doesn’t overcome us…Saying life is hard is not negative it is real and if Jesus was anything at all…Jesus was real…he said we would be knocked down, hurt, hated, cheated on, lied to and we would all taste death But…at the bottom of it all is the deep knowledge that we would never be out of God’s hands. Never. The writer of Hebrews commented that “it was a terrible and awful thing to fall into the hands of a living God…” BUT can you imagine falling out? I can’t.

    Again G- timely, lovely, insightful post…
    Kathleen

    Kathleen

  57. I don’t know why, but wonder about Mary Margaret ALL the time and I’m so grateful to hear that she’s fine. I figured she might be alive, but FINE is huge. My only eating disorder friend from high school is also fine, which I never, ever would have predicted 15 years ago. Miracles do happen . . . but then sometimes they don’t. Today I’ll think about the ones that do.

    Love,
    MK

  58. My life is so, so brutiful right now, and I’m in need of a miracle. Thank you for sharing this story, both the brutal parts and the happy ending – I was in tears as I got to the end of this post. It gives me hope for my own story.

  59. why DOES playdoh have to be so hard to open??? seriously though, great post!

  60. I’m not sure what happened to my first message so if it appears twice, my apologies.

    I wrote a guest post here on Momastery way back in the beginning about my life with an alcoholic husband and finding God again through Glennon’s blog. You see, I went to high school with Glennon and if you read that story I wrote, you will understand that Glennon was popular and if she had this strong faith then why couldn’t I. Yes I know even 17 (almost 18 years later, we non popular kids still look up to the popular kids).

    Anyway, my husbands problems with alcohol made for a horrible separation. Our son was only 1, our daughter 6. I told him to leave. My miracle is that he hit rock bottom. while that must have been so hard for him, it was his only way to get back up. He will be 3 years sober this October. He’s back and he’s better than ever. He’s home where he belongs, with me and the kids.

    Praise God!

  61. Glennon,
    Wow tears…Let me just say fourteen makes me weepy everytime I read it..I hurt for the sorrow you must have felt and I feel extremley grateful that you are better. I know it must be a challenge on somedays but you are right the fact that you and mary are better is a honest to God MIRACLE! I love you so much and am so glad you are both healthy,happy lovely women. Thank you for reminding me it is okay to be broken and sad that you don’ t always have to be perfect or live up to everyone else’s standards of us. It has been pretty brutual the last few weeks in my house and you inspired me and gave me hope today. This by the way is not a small thing I thought that my sadness might swallow me whole before I could find my way back again but it won’t and that is partially because of you. I want to say your writting lifts me up and reminds me of the important things. Thank you G just for being you! When I was 21 I got pregnant with my son Alex and was terrified that I would lose him because about six months before hand I had been pregnant with my son Dominic and had a miscarriage at three and a half months pregnant due to placentia previa. I thought this was going to kill me my family thought they were going to lose me it was BAD. When I got pregnant my life was a mess but I knew if I could have this little baby I desired so badly that I would love him forever. On April 29,2005 he was born 5lbs 13 ounces I was enduced because he stopped growing but we thought he was healthy. I was terrified everyday to leave his side for a moment but sleep has to happen. When he was three weeks old he had a seizure in my arms at church and my sister (aka my lobster) and my niece rushed me to the hospital to figure out what was wrong. It turned out he had a brain bleed and they didn’t know why but they put him on oxygen and seizure medication. We spent the next year and a half in and out of hospitals every other week at times because of seizures, sleep apneia, bronchitis,and pnuemonia. I didn’t think he was going to survive and I was pissed at God that he would give me this miracle to just take him back. So I pleaded and screamed at God to make him better three different times he stopped breathing in the hospitial and turned purple as I was holding him. It was AWFUL I was a mess and everyone I knew was trying to help me hold it together. Then the change came my boyfriend bought a house in kansas and we moved from colorado springs to kansas to be with him. Alex’s health slowly but surely got better everyday he would get sick but no hospital stays. His brain healed, his lungs healed,his sleep apneia stopped and he became a healthy happy strong little boy. Today he is completely healthy and that is a miracle because we never knew how it was going to stop or if it would. He turned seven yesterday and as I sat and played with him I thought about all the times I never thought I would have him and the fact that God was faithfuIl despite my lack of faith he did heal Alex. It is my miracle he is my miracle. God is faithful even when we are not and he might not always say yes to our crying and pleading but it isn’t because he doesn’t love us sometimes it is because he knows what is best. I am lucky to be Alex’s mama and will thank God forever for letting me keep him for as long as he does. I know have two more children am married and have a pretty amazing life most days. So I think even when we are at our darkest times if we remeber God is walking with us he is our refuge and our strenth our light in the darkness it sometimes makes it a little easier. I love you monkees and I will pray for your broken hearts..You are important and your sadness belongs to you but know that out here in this world you have people who have never met you that love you for being you and are praying for you and rooting you on. Love you all! Trish

  62. I wrote a guest post here on Momastery way back in the beginning about my life with an alcoholic husband and finding faith again through Glennon’s writing and if you read that guest post you will understand the miracle that came to be.

    My husband (we were going through a separation at the time) is back. He’s sober almost 3 years this October. He hit rock bottom but through the grace of God he is back home with me and our children.

    Praise God!!

  63. Babies seem to be the miracles in my little slice of the world. They were concerned (in-utero) that my daughter had a congenital heart defect or Down’s, but I knew she would be okay and declined testing. She’ll turn 5 on Friday and is amazingly healthy. My son had a heart problem while he was still in my belly that could have taken him from us when I was almost to term, but God, or a little birdie, or somebody whispered in my ear that I needed to get to the doctor (there were no physical symptoms except for some Braxton-Hicks contractions), and the next day I found myself in the hospital for almost a week so they could get his heart rate under control. He was born totally healthy and strong- his heart is fine now.

    Another friend was in the middle of a horrendous custody battle for her 10 year old triplets, complete with false accusations from the father of abuse by her which he manipulated the kiddos into corroborating. She lost custody except for every other weekend, which was nearly the end of her. They were also dealing with the heart-wrenching suicide of her fiancee’s little brother. She “couldn’t” get pregnant naturally- the triplets were concieved by in-vitro, yet they found out that she had indeed gotten pregnant and now has a beautiful, healthy, almost 1 year old who has helped them heal so much.

    And finally, a friend who lost her beautiful “little sister” to leukemia a year ago, and who also “couldn’t” get pregnant because of some health issues, is 5 months along. This is a miracle in and of itself, but she’s a fairly shaky diabetic, and this pregnancy, for the first time, has gotten her ANC numbers where they’ve always been trying to get them, and the baby is totally healthy so far.

    Life is tough. Life is beautiful. God is good.

  64. My daughter is a miracle. She was born exactly one year after I delivered my baby boy that had died. He was a miracle too. Has touched and changed our lives in many beautifully painful ways: http://www.nurturingmedusa.com Glennon, I love that u embrace the paradoxes of life. Not negative, just real and whole. Continuing to trudge through rugged terrain is a miracle. We are all miracles and it is these challenges that can help our souls grow.

  65. ♥ Thanks, I needed this on a brutiful day like today!

  66. thanks for sharing this beautiful email exchange, and a sweet peice of your shared history

  67. What I love most about this post is how you don’t wear your Life Is Good t-shirt now, in case you run into Anna. I love how sensitive you are to others feelings, right down to how what you wear might make someone who has recently lost a child feel if they see it. I kind of feel that way about hearing about other people’s miracles still. I really thought we would get one for our son, but it didn’t happen. Or maybe it did, and I just need to redefine my definition of what a miracle is; I have been thinking about that since he died.

    • I am so sorry for your loss Geri! My heart breaks for you.. I will pray for healing for your heart. It is okay to feel how you are feeling no matter what it is. God loves you just for you even if you are angry and don’t believe in him or don’t want anything to do with him. Love to you Geri and your family as you go through this heartbreaking loss.

    • Geri my heart goes out to you. In June it will be two years since we lost our precious six year old son to a brain tumor. Everyone kept praying for a miracle for us, but we knew it would never happen. A year after Joey died, we had another son. We weren’t planning it, it just happened. Although we had three other children besides Joey, this last one really taught me that life goes on and happiness can always be achieved somehow. I write about it a lot, which helps me, and hopefully others who visit my blog. Sending you the tightest, most understanding hug I can.

      • Thank you Kathy. It will be three years this June that we lost our Nick. We are doing okay, and there are many many happy times. Just not as happy as they once were, but how could they be? I am so so sorry about your Joey too.

  68. What a way to start off my Monday morning! This is just the best story! xoxoxo

  69. The grass knows when to grow.
    An acorn turns into a tree.
    A hummingbird flies.
    We are traveling around at 67,000 mph this very moment.
    The body regenerates every 7ish years. Wow. Seriously. Wow.
    A community loves on Anna, the Donaldsons and their own kids a little more.
    Food turns into fuel in the body.
    Breath. Breathe. Breath.

    “There are only two ways to live your life. One is as though nothing is a miracle. The other is as though everything is a miracle.” -Albert Einstein

  70. Your post today is spot on and whenever I think about the unfairness of life or the hardships so many are forced to face I think about a little card I have tacked to my bulletin board at school that someone gave me last year. It says:

    Our God has not promised smooth sailing…just a safe landing.
    “Blessed are those who trust in the Lord and have made the Lord their hope and confidence.” Jeremiah 17:7

    I just love that. No God has not promised that life will be smooth and easy and sunshine and roses at all times. But the hope we must have is that in the end, the journey will be worth it and we will be rewarded.

    P.S.-I love your word-brutiful-so accurate :)

    Lindsay
    http://lindsay-randomrandom-ness.blogspot.com/

  71. Here’s my little miracle story, She’s now 9 years old, never stops talking, and is the light of my life :)

    http://www.womansday.com/life/personal-stories/real-life-identifying-a-rare-birth-defect-112668

  72. hurray!! its miracle week! We really really want one right now, and are afraid to hope for it, because maybe its not best, or maybe the miracle won’t look the way we want. Thank you, Glennon!

    love,
    Sarah

  73. Thank you for this post today Glennon it is exactly what I needed today xoxo

  74. Oh Glennon! You’ve done it again! You and God just did something fantastic! I sit here headed out to a job I am just about sure I will not get.I am waiting on results of a biopsy for a spot on my back. They are telling me it may be a few weeks before I even hear from them. I am worn out and discouraged and asked God for something to show me there is hope for my little family. Now, not only do I feel hopeful I am going to look and see and share a miricle too… I’ll be back! This is the most…………………………………………………. I don’t even have any words.. just tears………………………………. and hope.

    • Sometimes what I almost love more than reading Glennon’s wise and funny posts on this blog is “listening” to the responses of others. Your reply made me smile BIG and I look forward to reading about *your* miracle later on. :-)

    • I love you Hillary!

    • Hillary, you are always so thoughtful and caring. Your morning messages are so welcome. Sending lots of prayers your way.

  75. My miracle may seem small, but it’s a miracle nonetheless. About four years ago, just a few months into my marriage, I found out I was pregnant. Unplanned, but extremely welcomed. At my 8 week appointment, we discovered that it was a missed miscarriage. I was devastated but my husband and I decided we’d try again immediately. Initially I was very optimistic that we’d get pregnant again quickly. But month after month, my period came. Thus began my downward spiral into depression.

    I was very excited when I finally got pregnant with my son one year later, and he is certainly part of my miracle. However, my miscarriage and the resulting depression refused to allow me to connect to that beautiful life I was carrying and when he was born, I was thrown deep into postpartum depression and anxiety. I didn’t, couldn’t love my son the way I knew I “should”. I had no guilt leaving him with my parents or in laws while my husband and I went out to dinner – I was just happy to be away from him. Nine months later, I found out I was pregnant again. Further I fell down the rabbit hole.

    I finally found the courage to seek out my therapist who had helped me after my miscarriage, and today, after being in once-weekly therapy for 2 years and finally getting my meds right, I am proud to say that I’ve “graduated” therapy and have learned how to manage my anxiety. I adore my children (truly miracles) and I am genuinely happy. Loving motherhood and feeling constant waves of “Oh my, how I love those babies” are my miracles.

  76. I’m sure I’m in the company of many when I tell you that your post today (and your blog in its entirety) give me hope and make me laugh and think and value the reality of “brutiful.” Thank you for this very hope-filled post, and for reminding us that it’s truly okay to recognize the life is hard sometimes.

    My miracle? After 24 years of married life and eleven years of sobriety, I finally accepted the grace and strength offered to me by the universe. I divorced my husband, though we remain good friends, and I accepted the fact that I am gay. As timing, chance and miracles would have it, I now find myself in a committed relationship with one of my best friends from “the program.” I couldn’t have made this up if I’d tried.

    Thank God for miracles, and thank God for allowing us to see them and each other.

    Much love to you, Glennon, and *all* the “Monks”! <3

  77. Love. Really needed this post today to be reminded of the miracles in my life. On March 16th, my moms 68th birthday, she suffered a stroke and heart attack at my house after her birthday dinner. She was in the ICU on life support for a week. We had to make some really really tough decisions that week. She was given a 50% of getting out of ICU alive. I wrote on your Facebook page and so many monkees responded and prayed (thank you!). This week she is moving in with my family!! She is paralyzed on her left side but she told me she walked 1000 feet using a walker yesterday and she is motivated to walk again, my 3 and 2 year old boys being her motivation. I’m scared I wont be able to care for her well enough, but she is an absolute miracle.

    • Theresa, I will keep praying for you and for your momma! You are a miracle too for being so brave when she needed you and letting her come stay with you!

  78. Love this post, my friend. I love that those two hurting girls grew up to be mommas. What a blessing to hear this. I have wondered about Mary Margaret a lot since reading that post. This gives me hope about the future.. xo

    and BTW, my Margaret has a cute Life is Good tshirt. We bought it for her at the beach in Aug and stashed it away for a Christmas present. When she opened it, Tim and I were like “Well………”

    • Anna: Tim, Margaret & you – you’re all a miracle, sister. That you’re breathing in & out, getting out of bed – and, well, LIVING, trusting God – that’s the miracle. That God is using you in so many hearts & lives – that’s another one. That you have such amazing courage & grace? – God’s gift. Praying for you today. xo

    • Life is.
      That’s enough.
      No label.

      LOVE YOU!

    • I agree with Cindy, Anna. You are a miracle, as is your little family. And so was Jack — a miracle gone much too soon. But oh!, what a streak of light and love that he left behind!! I feel honored to be a witness to his miracle, and yours, from reading your blog. Thank you!

    • I pray for you and your family, Anna. Your courage is awe inspiring, as is the fact that you still function. I’m sorry that you go through this. It’s not fair. And I don’t care that life is not fair… i still wish it was.

  79. I am sending this link along to my best friend who needs a miracle as well. It touched my heart, but you always seem to do that. I am so happy that Mary Margaret is healthy, and I am so excited that you get another chance to connect with her. THAT is a miracle too. :)

  80. God Bless the 100%!!! A miracle, indeed. And kudos to brave Mary Margaret for reaching out to you. I think miracles can come from outside of us, but also from within. At Jack’s funeral it felt like we were witness to a miracle coming from somewhere deep inside his mother, aunt, friends, family.
    Yesterday was tough here. The group I advise at our university, one of our women was called home – her mother was quickly loosing her 2-year battle with cancer. She made it home and her mother passed a few hours later. The girl is a senior, she’ll graduate this Saturday. As part of our senior ceremony we have the graduate’s parents write her a letter that we read to her in front of the whole group. Nicole’s mom wrote her letter and it arrived early last week. Although Nicole was home, she asked us to read her mom’s letter. It was brutiful and hard but also a miracle. We were able to bear witness to this perfect love.

    Hope all Monkees can have some divine intervention, kairos, miracle moments today.

  81. I am covered in goose bumps and I have tears in my eyes… what a miracle, indeed. And also a miracle that she found you and reached out to you… incredibly amazing!!

  82. A little over a year after being told I would never have children for various medically verifiable reasons, I found out I was pregnant. Very normal, healthy pregnancy and my son is now almost 12. No birth control for about 15 years, only 1 pregnancy and 1 healthy child. They were right medically that I couldn’t get pregnant but God gave me a miracle.

    Thanks for your blog. It is so encouraging to me and so many others.

  83. Years ago when I wanted to have a baby my husband and I tried for years with no luck. After about 2.5 years we went to a fertility specialist and the doctors ran tests on both of us. With the results of the tests the doctor told us the chance of having a baby was slim to none and we went home to decide what to do next. Before our next follow-up appointment, I was pregnant. Somewhere, somehow, there was one chance left. :)

  84. Thank you of your story, miracle indeed. I am sitting in a my home with my 2 year old child after dropping off my 8 year old. I am sober and happy most of the time in a world that can be imperfect and frankly a lot of hard work. Hard work was nothing I inspired to do; yet I am participating. My miracle, given freely to you and yours.

  85. Your blog is such an inspiration to me. You have helped me to embrace where I am and I feel like someone else out there gets it. Thank you.

  86. I love a good miracle and have been blessed by a real, honest to goodness one. My four year old son, Gavin, was born a mystery to all of his doctors. He has several things going against him since birth – one of which was permanent hearing loss that required hearing aids. As an infant at one point he had a NG feeding tube, oxygen and hearing aids – our first child. What an introduction to parenting!! My husband and I took him to the St. Katharine Drexel Shrine asking for a miracle. The odds were stacked against us. This was the type of hearing loss that was similar to nerve damage – untreatable and no chance that it would resolve.

    Six months later – much to the shock of all the doctors at A.I. DuPont Hospital for Children, Gavin’s hearing showed up completely normal after a sedated ABR hearing test.

    Gavin does not have the easiest life. And my own life has been filled with lots of heartbreak – including the stillbirth of my only daughter, Darcy, in May 2010. But knowing that he has “one less thing” to deal with – against ALL the odds – puts everything in perspective for me.

    Every time I “whisper sing” to my son and he smiles…I get to experience another miracle.

  87. 1. 13 year old daughter diagnosed with stage IV cancer & given a 70% chance of survival.
    2. 13 year old daughter relapses 8 weeks after the end of chemotherapy & given a less than 20% chance of survival.
    3. Daughter turns 14 and develops an infection that requires surgery every other day for 2 weeks – 0% chance of survival.
    4. Miracle #1 – daughter survives and needs a bone marrow transplant.
    5. Donor unavaible – back to 0% chance of survival.
    6. Daughter recieves a compassionate use exemption for a new drug that was initially created for AIDS patients but it failed – a side effect of the drug could help cancer patients who need a bone marrow transplant…. miracle #2
    7. Daughter receives drug – injected into her stomach for 5 days in a row.
    8. Enough stem cells are collected to go to transplant! less than 20% chance of survival.
    9. Bone marrow transplant successful – miracle #3
    10. 4 years later discovered daughter is permanently immunocompromised because of experimental treatments. Daughter’s response, “I’d rather be alive with no B-cells, than dead with a bunch of B-cells.” Brutiful attitude!
    11. 7 years later – daughter studying abroad in England and weeks away from turning 21 years old – miracles #4, 5, 6, 7, 8…………………………………
    It’s a brutiful life~

  88. WoW! That is wonderful! I’m so glad you recieved that gift…that gift of hearing from that roomate. It sent chills up my spine to think of how that must have felt for you…..such a peronal, tangible loving on from Abba! Woooooohoooo!!!

    Miracles are abundant in my life. And, I mean that sincerely, it’s just that pain is sbundant, too…just like you call it, BRUTIFUL! So, I will think on which miracle to share and come back later this week.

    LOVE that you get to share that miracle that took so many years to culminate, but was in the works, all the time!

  89. Love this post. Thank you Glennon.

  90. Yay! Glennon, so glad you two finally connected! I always hoped you would reconnect after I read that story. Amazing!! So, so happy. I am sure that calmed a place of wonder and worry in your heart!

    Andie

  91. I’m a labor and delivery nurse. When I was six weeks pregnant, I was messing around with the ultrasound machine at work. I thought I saw twin heartbeats!! The midwife came to look for me because I was shocked, panicked and thrilled. She said, actually, I had it wrong, there was NOTHING in my uterus that indicated a viable pregnancy. Not one heartbeat, not two heartbeats. I went home and cried. Called the dr. the next morning, they asked me to come in for an HCG (pregnancy hormone) level. It was high enough to be pregnant, but it should double in 72 hrs. Mine did not. I was also experiencing severe pain in my side. They thought perhaps it was an ectopic pregnancy. I had an ultrasound done, and they confirmed that while there was a sac for the pregnancy, there was nothing in the sac and I should go home and prepare for a miscarriage. I cried and prayed, prayed and cried. I came across Psalm 1:1 to 3. In v. 3, it says a few simple words, “. . which yields it’s fruit in season.” For some reason, although I know that bad things happen to good people all the time, God’s peace washed over me and I just KNEW that everything was ok with this pregnancy. The midwife at work the next week did an ultrasound for me, just to see what was going on. And there, the most beautiful image . . a little peanut with a flickering heart. It was a brutal few weeks, and yet a beautiful outcome. BRUTIFUL. (My joyful daughter just turned five a few weeks ago!!)

    • OMG…. This just made my heart stop… I had the same thing… but I listend to the doctors, I let them give me a drug to help ‘pass’ my ‘empty sac’…and I’ve been struggling with wondering if I aborted what would have been a beautiful blessing. I had two boys already, and both of them had been totally normal pregnancies, so when I saw the empty sac for myself, I knew something wasn’t right… but rather than being patient and waiting out the inevitable mis-carriage, I was freaked out about the thought of carrying around what I thought was a dead baby inside of me. Trying not to think about the fact, that had I waited, mine would have been due last week.

      • Julie,
        I am sending you lots of love and light. Please try to honor that wise mama sense in you that was freaked out and felt things weren’t right. You did not abort your baby. We can never know why some pregnancies end, which for me is so, so hard, but you must know that you did what was best for you and your babe.
        A month and a half ago, I also had a missed miscarriage. They sent me home without any options for medical intervention. I began bleeding and had cramps so severe I can only compare them to the contractions I had with my son, and my sweet, baby girl passed 12 hours later. For the next seven days, while I still had to work and parent, cramping, bleeding, infections, confusion from blood loss and physical pain all made it impossible to even begin to grieve.
        I don’t know why so many of us have angel babies, but I do know that feeling of “if only…” and “What if…..” And it sucks. It truly does. And I also know that it had nothing to do with you being inpatient. Maybe your body just couldn’t handle bleeding and an infection. Maybe taking that pill saved you from what could have been a life threatening situation and your boys just need you too much.
        I don’t know if I’m helping at all, but my heart stopped when I read your post… And I just wanted to yell across that universe to you, “No, you did the right thing. You’re okay. Take care of yourself.”
        Honor yourself and the baby you lost, and I’ll be honoring both of you from afar.
        Love to you.

        • Thank you, thank you, THANK YOU Margaret!!! I never usually check back to see if people commented on my comments (cause let’s be serious, I think we’re all on Momastery enough as it is, without continuing to check back on comments), but I’m SO thankful I did today, in our miracle week, your comment was a little miracle for me. I never thought about the otherside of taking the pill, of the negatives that could have been, and were possibly avoided. Thank you for believing in me, and helping me believe in myself! Love you!!!

  92. So happy for you…God is in the business of miracles…Love…

  93. Oh man, miracles. I have been pondering them a lot lately. In June 2008 I was diagnosed with an indolent (slow growing) non-hodgkins Lymphoma. I was told I was incurable, but my disease could be managed and I had every right to expect to live a normal lifetime. (My daughters were 5 & 7 at the time.) Fast forward 2 years. I had a remission, a relapse and several unsuccessful treatments. So much for being treatable, though not curable. I found myself looking down the barrel of a bone marrow transplant. Miracle #1: though my brother was not a match, I had 40 potential matches. Unheard of! 10,000 people each year need a transplant. Only 5,000 get one because the other 5000 don’t have a match. Those who do have 1-3 potential matches. Transplant goes smoothly. 40 days post transplant, I have an upper respiratory infection that causes Graft vs. Host Disease in my lungs and destroys my lung function. Definitely not a miracle. I am an active person. I used to dance ballet, spin, ski, practice yoga, walk every day and my doctor is telling me to get a scooter and the only exercise option for me is isometrics. What??!! We ask for a miracle. We ask everyone to pray for a miracle. In the next year, my lung function continues to decline. BUT, I am able to complete a 20 mile bike ride. I go back to work. I can care for my family. I am functional, don’t need oxygen and have a much better quality of life than my doctors expected. I realize this is miracle #2, though it took me a year to figure that out. Sometimes, miracles unfold slowly and we need to give Him time and trust that it will happen. Miracle #3: this past week, we found out my lung function has improved 10% since December. Miracles do happen, just not always the way we want or expect them to.

  94. that’s amazing that Mary Margaret found you! And now you both know that you’ve survived and thrived :) love it!

  95. A miracle happening right now…. My MIL has suffered 50 years of physical and mental abuse at the hands of her husband. She has left him, been to court to get a 2yr restraining order, has set up a new household, and is in the process of divorcing her angry, mean husband. She is blossoming. She finally has her own opinions, thoughts, and can make her own decisions. Woo hoo! A miracle I never thought we’d see…. Please pray for her continued strength!

    • I am praying for her!! I was in a mean marriage and left. Now I am married to a KIND man, I am free to think and do as I please. Mean husband did not want kids. I had my daughter at age 43, she is now 5 and a complete joy! Dreams come true, miracles happen, life is good.

  96. Love all your posts. I had my third baby in the front seat of my car, at 2am, on a rural highway with no one but my Hubby to deliver and 911 talking him through on his cell phone. Baby was born 3 weeks early, cord wrapped 2x around the neck…and my baby is now 6 yrs old. :) A miracle to me!
    My blog post about that night
    http://allgoodinmommyhood.blogspot.com/2010/10/craziest-night-of-my-life.html

  97. Thank you Glennon for sharing, for not editing when it feels wrong and for editing when it feels right. Your blog always touches me!

  98. Thank you for this post…and your “Fourteen” post too. I am so glad I found this blog <3

  99. Your posts are always an inspiration. . this one made me tear up at work. . .thank you for being so open, honest, genuine, and unabashed with your life and your struggles. We all have a story to tell, and I’m so glad you’ve found a way to tell yours.

  100. Love this post…and always love a good miracle ;)

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