“A true friend is someone who will make us do what we can.”
Ralph Waldo Emerson
Today’s my thirty-sixth birthday.
This morning I’m thinking about the most significant gifts I’ve received throughout the years. My family shows its love through gifts, and so there have been oodles. My mama uses her hands to knit rainbows of love for the girls and I to wear and Bubba uses his carpentry skills to create wooden masterpieces for us. He’s like Jesus, but with more Guinness and swearing.
There was the gorgeous antique bed my mom bought me when I turned twenty-one, because nobody thought I’d be leaving the house anytime soon. Then there was the realization that this queenly bed was far too high for my smurf-self to reach. Each night I had to go to the other side of my room, get a running start and LEAP like superwoman into that bed. One night I slid straight through to the other side and off the bed completely, landing on my head on my bedroom floor. And I was SOBER. I remember it hurt badly, and I wanted some sympathy, but it’s really not the kind of experience you can explain well to others without a certain level of embarrassment.
But the next day I did mention to my parents that I couldn’t really see over my bed, and for my next birthday my dad built me a beautiful step stool. It was my first year as a teacher, and there happened to be an old elementary school in our area being torn down. Bubba went to the construction site and collected pieces of wood from the destroyed elementary school and built my step stool. So I could reach things. Never before and never again will there be a step stool with more soul. I still use it. I’m looking at it right now, sitting next to the bed where Craig and I sleep, just waiting to help me into bed. Turns out most (if not all) beds are too high for me.
My kids give me gifts, but you know, they’re still things like play-doh snakes and I’m a little too materialistic to get truly psyched about that stuff. I act psyched, but, you know. Pick up a gift card, Tish, for real.
A few years ago, I was feeling a little empty. Empty because I had three babies, and my littlest wasn’t sleeping, and I felt angry and exhausted all day and then I felt guilty for feeling angry and exhausted instead of grateful for my blessings. Because I knew that children were supposed to make me feel full, but I didn’t really understand that theory completely since it seemed I was always giving, giving, giving to the point at which there was nothing left. Empty. Not a lot of time or space to fill up.
I know, because I hear from you regularly, that there are mamas out there that feel completely fulfilled and filled by mama-ing itty bitty ones. I used to be mad at you – and secretly believe you were lying – but I know better now. I’ve read so many of your stories that I realize you don’t feel this way just to spite me. It’s just that we’re all different, and that is a beautiful thing. It’s okay.
After reading all your mama stories I’ve developed a little theory that maybe we all have different mommy times which will be our favorite times. During which we’ll feel most capable and comfortable. I know many mamas who love pregnancy (what the WHAT?) and some who are brilliant at handling infancy and other who revel in the toddler years. Other prefer school aged littles and some really shine when their kids hit adolescence. Some mamas are really, really great parents to adult children. They know when to step in and out. They know how to share wisdom without making it feel like advice. I have a dear friend who said she thinks she will be an AMAZING mama after she is dead, when she can finally look down at her children with heavenly perspective, knowing she is no longer in charge. Makes sense to me. I guess my point is, if the stage you’re in right now isn’t your favorite mama stage- if you feel like you suck at it, frankly, well maybe it’s just not the stage for which your mama gifts are best matched. Hang in there. Maybe a time will come soon that feels like a better fit.
As for me – three kids under six didn’t seem to fit comfortably. I felt like I needed MORE and LESS at the same time. I felt a little nuts, to tell you the truth.
And one day (everyday) I was crying to Sister on the phone while she was already late for a meeting, and she said, “Sister- what do you think you need? Is there anything that will help?”
And at first I said no, nothing. Because that’s what we say, right? We say that because we are too tired to think and also because we think our problem is OUR PROBLEM and we should be able to fix it magically all on our own. But that day I decided to really think about what would help me. Because sometimes it’s important to really think about that. And I said, “Sister. I think I need to write. I need time to write each day.”
Christmas was the following week, and Sister gave me a brand new, silvery- green (the color of love) laptop. I just learned, last week, that they are not called labtops, Glennon. She wrote me a letter with it. The letter said that nothing would ever be perfect, but that things would be better if I wrote a little each day. She said that I had a gift, and that gifts are to be shared. And she had already talked to Husband about this gift, so he explained that the laptop came with a child free hour every single day that was MY hour. Just for writing.
And so I started writing. From 4:30-6:00 every morning. I explained to Husband that if there was a fire during that time, I would take my laptop to the neighbors and be back at 6 am to help with the children and fire and things. That’s how it was going to be.
A month later I started Momastery.
I am healthier today than I was three years ago, and I say that even though during these years Lyme has tried it’s damndest to wreck my body. I’m healthier because I am doing the thing that I am supposed to be doing. The thing I want to be doing. The thing that keeps my head and heart straight.And it started with a gift, from my best friend, who asked me what I needed and then gave it to me, and then believed in me.
And so I just wanted to tell you that story today, on my birthday, and ask you to really think about what you need, and ask someone for it. If you have no one to ask, ask us.
You know, people talk a lot about how they don’t want to get older. I could not agree less. Teens- nightmare. Twenties- terrifying. Early thirties- still cared too much what people thought of me. Now…36. I am telling you- I am just starting to relax into life. I am starting to feel comfortable in my own skin. I LOVE getting older. I feel a little less afraid each year.
And I evolve more into a Monkee each year. Which is quite funny, when you think about it.
I love you, Monkees. This was the best year of my life. THANK YOU for being a big part of this year’s magic.
Love,
G
[...] Image Source: Momastery [...]
I think other site owners should take this site as an model – very clean and excellent style and design, in addition to the content. You are an expert in this area!
I’m really late to the party. (Why have none of my blog friends told me about you all? They are all friends with you on fb. Not to worry, I will catch up and read all you’ve written this week.) My spiritual gift is speed reading.
This:
“And so I just wanted to tell you that story today, on my birthday, and ask you to really think about what you need, and ask someone for it. If you have no one to ask, ask us.”
…may be one of the most beautiful sentences I have ever read. And something I have finally, I’m 46, learned how to do a bit… that thinking about and figuring out what I need, finding a way to get it, even if it takes the necessary help of another. The understanding and the people helping are saving my soul, if not my life.
So, as I read more and more of who you and your posse are, what you all do, I have come to think of you as soul savers…the way God intended, we be, like Him. Finding the way to help folks be who they were made to be, and wholly so. Being the glue of grace, helping us all put back together, together, our brokenness.
It’s been a joy to be here. It am better for it, more me, less shattered. I’ll do my best to do some soul saving in my neck of the woods as well.
with you,
Kim
[...] other out wonderfully. It was a super duper bonus that Sister was there too. Sister is the one who gave Glennon her laptop and told her to get busy writing. I thanked her for that because ultimately it was a gift to all of [...]
Happy belated birthday G. I hope you had a fantastic day.
with balloons! Cause birthdays just call for balloons!
[...] to help us if we would only tell them how. Glennon recounts how her sister and husband found the perfect daily gift for her sanity and joy. What do you need at this season in your life? Who can you [...]
Thanks for sharing. I treasure your honesty, loved hearing how this blog got started, and am blessed by your writing and esp your thoughts on being a better mama at certain stages and phases. Love, Karyna
Hiya, I am really glad I’ve found this info. Nowadays bloggers publish just about gossip and web stuff and this is really annoying. A good blog with exciting content, that is what I need. Thank you for making this site, and I’ll be visiting again. Do you do newsletters? I Can’t find it.
Glennon, I found momastery just a few months ago, and I have to say, I sure am glad you decided to write down your thoughts, feelings and ideas and it turned into this blog.
I’m single-momming it with my two boys and have been doing so for a long time. I hate having to be in charge all of the time, and I hate how there’s never enough money, and how I don’t feel like we’re a whole family. But, finding your blog has helped to me feel less alone, and part of a bigger mommy movement that includes me.
For all the things that don’t work, the most important things do; like I know God is aware of me and my boys, and I know He loves us. I don’t always agree with what seems to be His plan for us, but I have to trust that it will all work out…
HUGE OOPS! Happy Belated Birthday, dearest G!
I’ve already commented once on this post, but it has been sticking with me. I need time to make music. I used to play the piano and sing, not especially talented at either, but I feel a sense of peace and completeness when it is a part of my life. With my own 36th birthday coming at the end of April, I know what I am asking for this year! Thanks yet again Glennon for your time and thoughts that force me to pause and reflect.
G,
Admittedly, I am sometimes a few days late in catching up with your posts, but somehow I seem to login when I really need to. And, even more miraculously, your entries seem to be what my heart needs to hear at that very moment. I don’t think this is coincidence. Thank you for sharing yourself – for being a mirror – for us (me). You are a gift to us and you make us feel like gifts to you. May this year be the most magical yet – happy belated birthday!
~ Trace
Hey, wait until you hit your 50′s (and menopause). All pretense is truly over! A few weeks ago, I decided I was sick of the time I spent on my hair. My mom liked hair that lay down FLAT. So that was my life. If I wanted my hair to look “acceptable”, I spent 30 minutes on it, after I got out of the shower. A damp day ruined everything. Then a few weeks ago, I had it ALL cut off. Really short. Now, I put a little dab of Be Curly (Aveda — marvelous stuff!) and rub it all around. Whatever curls and flips my hair ends up with, are the curls and flips for that day. From 30-minutes to 30-second! And I have ALL that time left. Right now, I’m using it to sleep a little later. And, wonder of wonders, everyone LIKES it! I get tons of compliments. None before with all the work. Go figure!
Happy (belated) Birthday! You make my heart happy, so glad Sister helped you share your gifts with all of us.
Thank goodness for your sister knowing you so well and caring enough to give you what you asked for.
Sometimes having someone who knows what you need is as lovely as the gift itself.
Happy belated birthday
As someone who has a VERY hard time asking for what she wants, this is something I needed to read. I am so so bad at this. Sometimes even when I am offered help that I actually need or want, I will refuse instinctually, because it is so hard for me to ask for and accept help. It’s not about pride for me, it more like…I don’t want to trouble anyone else. Even when asking for small things, it always feels like I’m asking too much. I know this is not rational. But knowing that your behavior is illogical and actually changing your behavior are two different things.
And this line,
“And so I just wanted to tell you that story today, on my birthday, and ask you to really think about what you need, and ask someone for it. If you have no one to ask, ask us.”
brought tears to my eyes. Thank you so much for creating such a loving online community. Thank you thank you thank you.
I do this too. I feel for some reason that I should be able to handle MY life for mercy sake, and how dare I put the burden of MY life on someone else. As I was reading your comment, I had a moment of inspiration that I wanted to share.
When I ask someone else how I can help them or what I can do to help, I’m not just offering, and when they can actually let me help I feel SO blessed. I feel like my life has meaning and like I am able to make a difference even if it’s just tiny and even if it’s just for one person. So, my epiphany is this: WHY oh why do I feel guilty or incompetent when I allow another of my fellow people to have that kind of joy, the JOY I feel when I can serve. Service is amazing like that, it requires someone to receive. And If I can just humble myself enough to realize that I DON’T HAVE TO do it all by myself even if this is MY freaking life, maybe just maybe I can give the joy of service to another. Then when it’s my turn to serve they can receive. Little by little we can then lift one another out of life’s yuck.
Me too, me too!!!! I will try harder to accept help and even ask for it….
Thanks for this G.
What I really need, only God can give me, and so I’m going to pray for it right here:
Dear God, please help me to be peaceful, content and happy with my life right the way it is now. Please take away my discontent and worry about my life that it’s missing something – that something ELSE would make me feel better or happier. Please give me peace every day and help me to accept just being happy and receiving what you have to give that day and go to sleep feeling good.
In Jesus’ name I pray, Amen!
Thanks G and Monkees!
Cindy, your prayer spoke to my heart!
Time to write. That is exactly what I needed too in these days of mothering a toddler and an infant. My husband agreed to let me hire a babysitter once a week for three hours.Those are MY hours and I spend nearly every second of them writing. It has been one of the most glorious gifts of my life.
Thank you so much for this post. This is truly an answer to prayer for me when I read it. I have a 3 year old and newborn (both wild boys!) and am so exhausted and know that empty feeling you wrote about. I have been praying for God to help me find more love and compassion for my children. It’s not that I don’t love them, but I’m not enjoying this season of my life like I expected I would. Thank you so much for reminding me of all the many wonderful seasons I have yet to experience in this mommy journey. Momastery is such a blessing in my life.
YOU are a gift. Plain and simple.
And we Monkees are blessed to have you in our lives.
Hope your birthday was spectacular, just like your words
xo,
N
i love love love your blog. thank you for writing. thank you for reminding us mamas that we are all gifted in different ways. happy birthday!
Happy birthday, Glennon!
And thanks to Sister, because her gift to you was really a gift to all of us.
I turned 36 last September, and I cannot agree with you more about finally being able to relax.
Are you considering telling us what other Monkees as for in a future post? Because I’d love to see if there’s anything I can give, but….226 comments so far? yikes!
Happy Happy Belated Birthday – or are you still celebrating? I’m glad I found you and your writing…what a difference you make!
Happy Birthday girl! Thanks for reminding me that I’m not the only one out there feeling this way. Luv ya, Andi
LOVED this and what you wrote about getting more comfortable as you get older. I am struck dumb when people talk about wishing they were still 17, 18 etc. SERIOUSLY!?! I barely survived it the first go around and carry the scars, physically and spiritually, to prove it! Each year (and I carry a couple more than you) I am more and more grateful for who and what I AM rather than dwelling on who and what I am not. Thanks for sharing your gift with us, Glennon, and happy birthday!
I need a vacation (none in 6 or more years now). Or a bigger house with my family living waaaaay on the other side and me on one side. A cozy room to excape too. I need space. Quiet. Solitude. My sanity. I love my family but…. I am 50. I am tired. I am of the “new norm” of families. The (two) grown children living with you and a granddaughter as well due — to many factors. All crammed into a tiny townhouse. I am going mad. Blissfully mad, but mad, ha ha! This is the new norm. Anyway. I.need.me. (and I did pick up two lottery tickets today). Pray for me.
Terri
I can relate – will pray!
I don’t know how I missed this the day you wrote it. I NEVER miss a Momastery post. I stalk the site three or four times a day waiting for them. Even weekends.
But I missed it.
And today, sitting at my desk at work trying to bottle up the tears and screams bursting out of me from my 16-year old’s latest betrayal, I saw Glenna’s birthday card picture and it reminded me I hadn’t checked.
And I feel like you punched me. Because right now, I really suck at being a 16-year old Mom. And I hate myself for that because I have never felt that way before.
Thank you for having the words I can’t form.
36 was the year that changed my life. The birthday that I decided the life I was living was NOT the mountain I wanted to die on. I divorced & have struggled everyday since to raise my 3 boys 1,100 miles away from my home & family. What I really need is to move home and raise my boys in the same loving, compassionate small town that created me. I will NEVER get that. I turn 39 this year and I am again at a pivitol period. I am trapped and 100% not in control of my circumstance and I am struggling with how to move forward knowing that the one thing I need as much as oxygen for existence is the one thing I can never have. You are right Glennon, life does get better as you age. I wouldn’t go back to my 20′s. I love that I am nearing 40 because I will find a way, I will have a good life….it’s just gonna take a little time.
Hope your birthday was wonderful, Glennon! I found your blog recently and it has helped me immensely. I’m a mom of nearly 4-yr-old twin boys and, lately, every day feels like a long, hard struggle. Struggle to find my identity and voice amidst all their needs and wants. I know if I don’t care for myself I won’t be any good to them or my husband. But it still feels selfish at times.
I’m so lost I don’t even know where to start. I cried reading of your sister’s gift. She truly heard you.
I guess I just don’t feel like there’s anyone in my life who truly hears my calls for help and cares enough to offer a hand. I guess I have to be that person for myself.
I hear you. What can we do to help?? For tonight, just KNOW that you were heard. And that someone is thinking of you – this night.
I hear you too. Sending love.
Hi Glennon,
Thank you for this. I turned 36 on March 15th and it was the worst day! I was alone with the kids all day, it rained, husband had to work late and there was no food in the house. But you’re right, I LOVE getting older (sans the white hair and receding gums — even that’s not TOO bad) and I love that this season of motherhood is temporary and quite fleeting. I love reminders like yours and God’s “no matter what” grace and family.
Happy birthday! Go 36!
Happy Birthday! Birthdays are a big deal — whether we’re 3 or 53 — we just lose most of our audience over time:)
Thank you, thank you, thank you for sharing all of your ups, downs and in-betweens. Long time follower, first time post.
I’m a 33 yr. old mother of five — yes, it sounds about as crazy as it really is. Life has thrown us some curveballs, but made for an amazing game so far.
Just last night, I was having this same conversation with a good friend. She has spent so much of her last 20 years filling up her mom & wife jars, that she’s lost track of what’s in her jar … her before him and the kids. She’s struggling to find meaning now that everyone’s in school and she’s not the mani/pedi type. She’s struggling to remember her gift.
Gift as in what only she has been given by God; and gift as in what she can only find happiness in sharing.
I think this is every mom’s struggle …. maybe every woman’s. We have the deepest desire to live a life for others, but somewhere along the way our serving begins to define us. God made many wives and mothers for many different families, but there is only one, unique you. In all of time — from the beginning to the end — only you can be who you are and do what you do.
Thank you — you are such a gift –
I’m 34 years old w/ 2 little ones. And on this beautiful spring morning, I looked at myself naked and wet in the bathroom mirror and much to my surprise saw a gorgeous, voluptuous woman looking back. Not in a million years would I want to go back to my uncertain twenties and I look forward to look at myself in the mirror at 60 and still see a gorgeous, voluptuous woman looking back.
Rock on sister!
seriously, rock on!! you are gorgeous. i can just tell.
I love hearing stories of people who find their thing that not only fills their ‘empty’ but also directly taps into a greater energy and spirit and takes on a life of its own. I haven’t found my thing yet.
Glennon, I would love to know: does writing just flow from you? Does it feel freeing and effortless? Or is it hard some days?
I’m hoping your answer will help direct me in answering the question you suggest in this post. IE, how does it feel when you find the answer you’re seeking? Is it a-ha, or does it take a while? I wonder if it change osver time?
Honestly, the answer that comes to me today is, “I need a trusted friend I can talk to on a regular basis.” But that doesn’t sound like the stories I like to hear, where the person finds their gift that helps them answer the eternal question of, ‘why am i here?’
Glennon-Happy Birthday! Seems since that birthday you’ve been giving others so many gifts. Thanks for treating us! I just noticed Kirsten’s comment (#213)… didn’t you call your students “Diamonds” one year? Char
May I ask everyone if you feel that time has been rushing by right after we endstaged the teens? Is that a symptom of trips around the sun or am I just running out of daylight and will there be a slower more acceptable pace that doesn’t feel so rushed and where I don’t feel so torn. Or is my torniss going to subside curing me of feeling rushed? I’m sorry but ever since my girls were born, there just isn’t any freaking time … scary. Could however be just me – I’m told that if I feel I need more hours in the day now, I just need to wait til my kids are in school and you know what that scares me! However I do love birthdays. Time needs to stand still for an upright awesome celebration! Happy birthday (again)
Antje, how old are your kids? I have two who are now 14 and almost 16. I’ll never forget the day when they were around maybe 5 and almost-7 and the strangest feeling hit me: after years of busy-busy-busy, I had a few minutes where I was in the kitchen alone and had nothing I HAD to do. It didn’t even feel refreshing — it just felt strange to have my hands idle for a minute. I just will never forget that moment, and it was definitely a turn for the better in terms of being able to carve out more time for ‘me.’ Unfortunately, time itself (in terms of weeks, months, years) is rushing by even faster than ever. But there’s less busy-ness to take away from the enjoyment of it. (I’m not saying everything is perfect AT ALL — just that one element has gotten better!)
Now that I can wrap my head around.
They are 4 and 1 1/2 and I immensely enjoy this very hard and nerve racking mama stage although there seems to be little if nothing left of me but I get scared that we are living so very fast that it could not be normal. I am very much looking forward to that moment with nothing to do and no pieces to give while everyone is taken care of. Thank you, Mary!
Thanks for responding — it’s nice to know it helped! It’s also not a bad thing to ask even a 4 yr old to ‘help refill mom’s tank’ — I’ve tried that on my kids (to varying levels of success), and sometimes they seem to get that my tank just runs out of gas sometimes, and their love (a hug, a change of attitude, a small show of gratitude, cooperation, anything) fills me back up. Doesn’t always work, but worth a try!
Happy Birthday Glennon!
Thank you for the wonderful gift of your writing! I am inspired and encouraged by it. (My baby sister is my “Lobster” too!)
God Bless you!
Hope you’re having a wonderful birthday filled with lots of gifts, both literal and figurative. Thanks for sharing your writing with us and reminding mothers that there is no one “right” way of thinking about parenting.
Happy Birthday! It’s amazing how God uses people in our life to show us who we should be. Thank you for writing these beautiful posts. EVERY time I read one of your posts I just sit and cry. I’m a stay at home mother to two boys, one and three years old. Most days I wonder why the heck God decided I needed children and there are almost always lots of tears and shouting. I’m struggling so much with dealing with the day to day things in life. And then to add to it all I want to have another child- I really must be crazy! Well anyway, thank you so much for your honest words!
Happy Birthday! I’m coming up on 46 in a week. I LOVED turning 40. I felt like no one could mess with me. Ever. Now, don’t get me wrong, there are some things that I have to accept with aging: like, naked, I just dont look like I used to! I am blessed with a husband who loves me no.matter.what, so what does it really matter? he’s the only one who sees me naked anyway! But, you know, a just-starting-to-slightly-sag body is a VERY small price to pay for the wisdom I feel I’ve gained, for the gift of feeling so at home inside my own skin. Add 12 almost 13 years of sobriety to that and, what the heck! This is a GREAT ride! Cheers to you, your aging, and your sobriety, and your success! http://accidentaldisciple.blogspot.com/
Happy (belated) birthday!!! Love your sister (makes me wish I had one) for knowing your heart and then giving you the means to pursue your gift! It’s awesome that you have scheduled writing time. With a new blog of my own, that’s one I struggle with. So I’m just wondering…..what time do you have to go to bed to be able to get up at 4:30???!! I’m impressed (and just the teensiest bit jealous
)
Glennon – thank you for being one of the greatest gifts God has brought us! A close girlfriend walked over to me as I was reading tyour birthday post and I just broke down telling her how amazing you are and what you have done to change/save/brutify my life and the lives of so many.
Here’s the thing G, I recently asked God for help…but I didn’t even know what I needed. I am where you were a few years ago, struggling to get to the other side of PPD after giving birth to two amazing boys just 15 months apart – loving them desperately but not understanding how I could simultaneously feel so empty and alone. All I could mutter in a tearful, desperate prayer one night was “please save me”.
Literally, within 24 hours and a few ‘accidental’ clicks of a mouse, I found you, Momastery and my Monkees.
(I’ve also since found that our worlds are so small….my sisters having known/grown up with you and Sister! Crazy.)
Thank you dear soul for showing us that WE CAN DO HARD THINGS and LOVE WINS.
Love you!!!
Happy Birthday! Here’s what I need. I need to be making art and I need to be helping people. I need to figure out how to do both while working full time and mothering a two year old. I’m pretty stuck on the art front and it’s been making me crazy lately. Not sure how to get unstuck but hoping that posting it here will help move me forward.
happy birthday from the other side of the world!
i follow your blog since about 4 weeks – and i feel so inspired!!!
you are such a wonderful monkee!
Happy birthday, Glennon!! Another great post that resonates with me. Thank you! I like what you wrote about taking the time to actually THINK about what you need. Now I know I need to do that. It is too easy to just ride this thing called life and let it pass us by. How great to take a little time, think deeply about what we need and then ask for it! And look at where it got you!! Glad you did that!
I have been following your blog for a bit, and as other people have written, I came across your writing just when I needed it and it really made a difference for me. I have actually changed my perspective and now feel more at ease as a mom, just knowing that this parenting thing IS hard for other people, too.
Hope you have a great birthday, celebrate well!
Happy Birthday! I’ll be 36 this year as well and like you said I think I’ve finally found my groove. In my 20′s I NEVER thought that I’d be in my mid-thirties by the time that happened. And so…what do I want? I want happiness and mostly I’ve got it. A loving husband, 2 adorable boys and a house in the suburbs! Ridiculously I still want more…happiness that is. I want happiness for someone in my life that just can’t seem to find it, my mother. Now how to give someone happiness? She loves her grandchildren and would do anything for them but mental illness bogs her down and oh yea…some really bad luck. First I’ll start with trying to find her a place to live because for now she’s homeless. It’s hard to try and lead your own life, raise your own children, protect your marriage and take care of a parent at the same time. This is my goal for the rest of my 30′s…find her happiness. I just hope its possible.
Glennon, I was just recently referred to your site… and wow, you have a gift!
I get goosebumps when God’s timing is unspeakably perfect. Two things encouraged my heart deeply: 1.) Reading this post was like reading words from my own heart. Thank you for the reminder that I’m not crazy for sometimes struggling like I do as a mom
and 2.) This year I have made it my goal to practice my writing skills… because I share your dream in wanting God to use my talents in writing and because my soul NEEDS to write. It was refreshing and motivating to be reminded that it’s ok and necessary to call out and go after what we need and to gather support in achieving that.
Today, I was home with my two small children (3 and 1 years) and even though I’ve made it a goal to write… it’s been a sheepish attempt and I’ve been feeling empty. I just sobbed when I read your post because it hit such a cord in my soul. Thank you for writing with such vulnerability, heart and truth. Today you’ve made me want to be a monkee!
G – I love this post! My 36th is on Saturday and I have felt the same through all these stages and THANKFULLY feel like I am FINALLY chilling out and being me. Thank you for writing what I feel. I love your blog!
After reading this post and your one previous, I’d been thinking a lot about Mom guilt and whatnot–and then I drive by a church yesterday and the sign says, “God’s grace exceeds our guilt.” WOW! Hit me in the face, it did! Combined with your thoughts, I’m just swimming in the “it’s all right, it will all be all right”-ness of these thoughts.
(Just discovered you and your blog recently, so I am a newbie. Have 3 yr old, 4 month old and just back to work full time. Oy!–So I’ve really been hearing/feeling your posts. Thanks!)