During dinner the next night, we said to the kids, “Our family time is very important, and we want to spend it wisely and carefully. We’re not sure the TV is the best use of our time, so, for now, it’s gone.” We braced ourselves for hysterics. Instead we got, “Oh, ok. That’s weird. What’s for desert?” It was no big deal to them then, and it isn’t now- it’s their new normal. A week after our dinner announcement Chase said, “Mommy, without the TV I’m bored.” I expressed what a fortuitous delight it was that he didn’t have enough to do because I had too much to do… and I handed him the broom and some Windex and told him to go clean his bathroom. Look mommy, no more bored! Now they look to each other to figure out what to do next. Their reward for a long day at school is to build forts, play outside, or lie around and stare at the walls and sigh together. They are learning much earlier than I did that boredom is the place creativity begins.

I’ve never been comfortable with silence. I spend much of my day wishing for peace and quiet, and then as soon as it presents itself, I kill it with noise. I turn on the TV, the radio, the computer…anything not to be left alone with myself. When we got rid of the TV, I decided to actually give peace and quiet a chance. And in these periods of stillness I have discovered another life – a creative, reflective, spiritual life which is now layered on top of my daily existence as a mother. It’s when I am able to transcend the immediate and urgent needs of my kids and home and allow God to take my thoughts wherever He wants them to go, uninterrupted. It’s when I listen for and hear His voice. For me, the danger of constant input is that in the absence of that still small voice, any voice will do. So these days when the kids are off playing, when I’m doing the dishes, in the early morning and late evening… I discipline myself to keep everything off and just be for awhile. And sometimes I actually get some of that peace I’m always chasing.

Craig agrees that life without the TV is more peaceful. He reads more, and worries less…he’s discovered that our 401ks will be the same whether or not we allow our hearts to rise and fall with the Dow Jones. He’s proud that we, along with the Amish, seem to be the only Americans who didn’t know a single detail about Michael Jackson’s funeral. He also tells me that he feels closer to me lately. Like the kids, we have to depend on each other now for entertainment. He does note a few flaws in our experiment thus far. Our credit card bills suggest that my shopping habit hasn’t changed yet… so I ask him for patience, hoping that it just takes time to detoxify the ego and soul and to redirect the minivan’s trajectory. He also mentions that we don’t seem to be having all that frequent hippy sex that was predicted. When he removed the TV from the wall, he couldn’t commit to putting it away for good, so he slid it underneath our bed. Craig and the TV hang out in our bedroom together a lot, dreaming of their glory days and wishing someone would come in and turn them on.

  7 Responses to “Rage Against the Machine, 3- The Quiet”

  1. I know you wrote these back in ’09. I just wanted you to know I totally identify and am grateful that you wrote out these thoughts. It encourages me to know I am not the only one who feels like this. It inspires me to listento that inside voice that says to turn it off.

  2. "For me, the danger of constant input is that i the absence of that still small voice, any voice will do."This is so much of what's wrong with the world. So true. Turn it off…keep it off.If you ever do get TV again, save yourself some money and don't get cable. Get a Tivo…and fast forward through all the commercials. :)

  3. Jennifer, I cannot believe you remember that! In eighth grade my dad bet me $500 that I couldn't go a year without the TV. He is actually not paying me this time, though I asked him to.Also, thank all of you lovely people for leaving comments. I love them. They make my day.

  4. I still remember when we were in high school and an article was written about you not watching TV for a month. The picture was of you sitting at your kitchen table with 90210 on the TV in the background. I guess some things never change huh. Good for you though, I wish I could just chuck the TV out the window.

  5. I totally get the need for silencing the noise, but unfortunately my right brain needs the background noise to silence the incessant chatter of my left brain…and tell Craig that after the children grow up and go off to college there will be plenty of time for you to think about having fabulous hippy sex with him! LOL

  6. Thank you for writing about the silence, Sister.

  7. I just love your writing girl. It speaks to my heart!

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